told her again and again that she didn't need to worry, but she knew Tanya would anyway.
Saying goodbye to the girls was hard, but it was worse saying goodbye to Peter. She clung to him like a motherless child, and he gently helped her into the limo, and teased her when he saw the colored lights inside that Megan had objected to. It was tacky, but he thought it was funny. “Maybe I should ride to L.A. with you, and let the girls drive home on their own,” he said, teasing her. She smiled, and then he kissed her.
“I'm going to miss you so much tonight,” she said softly. “Take care of yourself. I'll see you Friday.”
“You'll be so busy you won't even miss me.” he said, although in spite of himself, he looked sad, too, but he was glad she was doing this. He wanted it to be great for her, and had every intention of doing all he could to make it work for her.
“Call me when you get home,” Tanya said softly.
“It'll be late”—closer to one than midnight now. Their goodbyes had taken a long time. She could hardly bear to let them go.
“I don't care. I'll worry till I hear from you.” She wanted to know that they were home safe and sound. She didn't expect to get a lot of sleep that night without him. “I'll call you on your cell phone in the car.”
“Why don't you relax, go for a swim, get a massage. Order room service. Hell, take advantage of what you've got. Before you know it, you'll be home cooking for us again. You're never going to want to come home to Marin, after the high life in Beverly Hills.”
“You're my high life,” she said sadly, sorry that she had agreed to write the script. All she could think of now was who wouldn't be in L.A. and what she'd be missing—her husband and children and the good times they shared.
“We'd better go.” He could see that the girls were getting restless. Megan was fuming, and Molly looked sadder by the minute, and Tanya could see it, too. She kissed him one last time, and reached out to the girls. She and Molly kissed through the limo window, and Megan stared at her and turned away. There was sadness mixed with anger in her eyes, and a terrible look of betrayal, and then she got into the van. Molly climbed into the front seat next to her father, and all three of them waved as he started the van. Tanya sat watching them with tears rolling down her cheeks, and then with a wave, they rolled away. She kept waving to them from the window, and the limo followed Peter out of the parking lot. They drove toward the freeway side by side, and then Peter headed north, and the limo headed south. Tanya waved until they were out of sight, and then laid her head back against the seat and closed her eyes. She felt their absence like a physical pain, and then with a start she heard her cell phone ring. She found it in her handbag and answered it. She wondered if it was Jason, telling her he had forgotten something. She could turn back and get to the dorm in a few minutes if he needed help. She suddenly wondered if Peter had remembered to give him enough money, in case he needed cash. He had his first checking account, and a credit card. It was a first step into grown-up life. Responsibility had begun.
It wasn't Jason, it was Molly. “I love you, Mom,” she said with her characteristic sweetness. She didn't want her mother to be sad, or her sister to be angry, or her father to be lonely. She always wanted to make things right for everyone. She was always quick to sacrifice herself. Tanya always said she was a lot like her father, although she had a sweetness all her own.
“I love you too, sweetheart,” Tanya said softly. “Have a safe drive home.”
“You, too, Mom.” Tanya could hear the music blaring in the car and missed it. She would have felt foolish turning it on in the limo, particularly their kind of music, but she would have liked to. She was already lonely, traveling in solitary grandeur. She could no longer remember why she'd done this, or why it had
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