judged.
I cleared my throat and
then said, “What if this is just a rebound for me?”
“What do you mean?”
“After…being widowed.
What if I don’t really like him? I just think I do because I’m not use to being
alone?”
The thought had struck
me late last night as I drifted off to sleep. Who hadn’t heard of rebound
relationships? What if I was throwing a job away and risking myself and someone
else because I thought I really liked this guy?
Once the thought was in
my head, I couldn’t get rid of it. It was as though it rattled around in my
head like a bunch of marbles, clanking and rolling in my brain. Maybe I was
over thinking things, which was something I excelled at. But it could be that
this was real — and what if I kept thinking like this and it psyched me out
completely? Was it too late to turn back?
Cathy peered at me, “I
don’t think so, Serena.”
“Why not?”
“I’ve known you a long
time. I’ve seen you when you thought guys were hot, even when you were married
and didn’t want to admit you were checking them out. I’ve seen how much you
loved your husband and how completely ruined you were when he passed away. The
way you’ve been attempting to hide how you feel about your boss for weeks now
was so clearly obvious to me that it was hard to keep quiet. Hey, do you think
they’d let me smoke here?”
I rolled my eyes,
“Cathy, it’s a playground.”
She waved her hand,
“Fine, fine. Anyway, Serena, your feelings are valid and so are your concerns.
But if you back away from this…I just don’t want you ten years down the line
when Greg is nearing his twenty-first birthday and you’ve bought your tenth cat
because you’re alone to wonder man, what if I had gone after my hot boss?”
In spite of the
seriousness of the subject, I laughed, “I guess so.”
“You have to do what
you have to do for yourself. You put Greg first and that’s amazing — that’s
what mothers are supposed to do. But make sure you leave time for yourself
too.”
I smiled at her,
feeling a bit better. I looked back at Greg who was pretending to be a pirate
in front of a giant wooden ship replica that the playground had put up last
summer. If it wouldn’t have embarrassed him, I would have gone over at that
moment and hugged him with all my might. But I knew he’d scrunch up his face
and be annoyed with me so I held back. I realized he’d only be getting older
and that would result in having to back off more and more. The thought saddened
me and I put it out of my mind.
“How about lunch?” I
said to Cathy.
Chapter 10
I went in to the office
Monday morning with slight trepidation that Winter would be there, ready to
brawl in the office. But it was quiet and she wasn’t there. Bradley’s office
door was open a crack and I could hear him typing away. Relieved that Winter
wasn’t there, I peeked my head into his office.
“Good morning.” I said.
He looked up from his
computer screen and smiled, “Hey, Serena.”
“No Winter this
morning?” I joked.
Bradley shook his head,
“No. I heard she was meeting with her lawyer this morning so we should be safe
till this afternoon.”
I laughed a little and
stepped inside, “I brought you a coffee.”
“Oh, thanks.” He
replied as I walked over to his desk and placed it next to his hand.
“How was your weekend?”
“I tried to lay low,”
Bradley said, “I didn’t feel like dealing with anyone this weekend. Stayed in.
What about you?"
“Took Greg to the
playground. We went out for lunch and to the movies too. It was nice.”
He smiled, “You look
pretty today.”
In spite of myself, I
blushed, which caused him to laugh, “You look nice too.” I said.
“Listen, I was
wondering if you’d be able to get a sitter for Greg sometime this week and we
could go out for dinner.”
“Are you sure? Won’t
people see us?”
“Business dinner, we
can tell them, if anyone cares enough to ask.”
“Sure. Let me find
I cleared my throat and
then said, “What if this is just a rebound for me?”
“What do you mean?”
“After…being widowed.
What if I don’t really like him? I just think I do because I’m not use to being
alone?”
The thought had struck
me late last night as I drifted off to sleep. Who hadn’t heard of rebound
relationships? What if I was throwing a job away and risking myself and someone
else because I thought I really liked this guy?
Once the thought was in
my head, I couldn’t get rid of it. It was as though it rattled around in my
head like a bunch of marbles, clanking and rolling in my brain. Maybe I was
over thinking things, which was something I excelled at. But it could be that
this was real — and what if I kept thinking like this and it psyched me out
completely? Was it too late to turn back?
Cathy peered at me, “I
don’t think so, Serena.”
“Why not?”
“I’ve known you a long
time. I’ve seen you when you thought guys were hot, even when you were married
and didn’t want to admit you were checking them out. I’ve seen how much you
loved your husband and how completely ruined you were when he passed away. The
way you’ve been attempting to hide how you feel about your boss for weeks now
was so clearly obvious to me that it was hard to keep quiet. Hey, do you think
they’d let me smoke here?”
I rolled my eyes,
“Cathy, it’s a playground.”
She waved her hand,
“Fine, fine. Anyway, Serena, your feelings are valid and so are your concerns.
But if you back away from this…I just don’t want you ten years down the line
when Greg is nearing his twenty-first birthday and you’ve bought your tenth cat
because you’re alone to wonder man, what if I had gone after my hot boss?”
In spite of the
seriousness of the subject, I laughed, “I guess so.”
“You have to do what
you have to do for yourself. You put Greg first and that’s amazing — that’s
what mothers are supposed to do. But make sure you leave time for yourself
too.”
I smiled at her,
feeling a bit better. I looked back at Greg who was pretending to be a pirate
in front of a giant wooden ship replica that the playground had put up last
summer. If it wouldn’t have embarrassed him, I would have gone over at that
moment and hugged him with all my might. But I knew he’d scrunch up his face
and be annoyed with me so I held back. I realized he’d only be getting older
and that would result in having to back off more and more. The thought saddened
me and I put it out of my mind.
“How about lunch?” I
said to Cathy.
Chapter 10
I went in to the office
Monday morning with slight trepidation that Winter would be there, ready to
brawl in the office. But it was quiet and she wasn’t there. Bradley’s office
door was open a crack and I could hear him typing away. Relieved that Winter
wasn’t there, I peeked my head into his office.
“Good morning.” I said.
He looked up from his
computer screen and smiled, “Hey, Serena.”
“No Winter this
morning?” I joked.
Bradley shook his head,
“No. I heard she was meeting with her lawyer this morning so we should be safe
till this afternoon.”
I laughed a little and
stepped inside, “I brought you a coffee.”
“Oh, thanks.” He
replied as I walked over to his desk and placed it next to his hand.
“How was your weekend?”
“I tried to lay low,”
Bradley said, “I didn’t feel like dealing with anyone this weekend. Stayed in.
What about you?"
“Took Greg to the
playground. We went out for lunch and to the movies too. It was nice.”
He smiled, “You look
pretty today.”
In spite of myself, I
blushed, which caused him to laugh, “You look nice too.” I said.
“Listen, I was
wondering if you’d be able to get a sitter for Greg sometime this week and we
could go out for dinner.”
“Are you sure? Won’t
people see us?”
“Business dinner, we
can tell them, if anyone cares enough to ask.”
“Sure. Let me find
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