"Can I join you for a minute?"
"Please."
Ford sat, folding his hands in front of him, careful to place his back to the table of doctors he had abandoned. He spoke at once, in order to forestallparalysis. "I wanted to thank you again for what youdid the other day. Duringthe accident."
Danstillwatched his cereal. "I reallydidn't do verymuch."
A line of red crept up Dan's neck into his face. At once, understanding Dan's fear, Ford lost sight of his own. He said, "I think you did enough."He wanted to make Dan look at him, and continued, "But that isn't whyI sat downhere."
Dan nodded. "I figured that." His voice almost vanished. "I've beenstaringat youever since I sat down. I'msorry."
The statement stunned Ford. An ache welled up in him, and he said, "I came over here to ask you to go to dinner with me. Sometime soon."Speaking now to keep his own breath even. "I was lookingat you, too, youknow."
Ford could detect each change in the man's lowered face, initial disbelief giving way to comprehension. Dan's grip on the cereal spoon tightened till his knuckles were white. He took a longbreathand looked at Ford.
They watched each other in silence. Not since McKenzie had Ford read so much in another face. He felt himself opening and relaxing, drawn to the body across the table as if they were falling toward each other. Ford laughed. "Well. Answer my question."
"Yes, I want to have dinner with you."Shock stillregistered in Dan's expression. "Have youbeenplanningthis for a while?"
"Since last week.Whenever the accident was."
Dan shook his head in wonder. "I've been watching you for a longtime. Since youwere a medicalstudent. I can't believe it."
Ford blushed himself, as if no one had ever admired him before. He glanced back at the table ofphysicians stillengrossed intheir medicaldiscussion. Turningto Danagain, he said, "I need to get back to my ongoing learning experience before my senior resident comes after me. Whencanwe do this?"
They negotiated the date, shy of watching each other but drawing out the process in spite of Ford's need to return to his duties across the cafeteria. Ford was on call for several nights running, and Dan was busy with rehearsals for a musical at a local community theater. They settled on a Friday evening in a week, and Ford noted the engagement in his pocket calendar. This business finished, theysat.
"I don't particularlywant to go right now,"Ford said.
"I don't either,"Dan replied. "I haven't eaten very much of my breakfast. But if I don't get back to my office, I'll never dig myselfout fromunder the morningmail."
They rose from the table together. Standing, Ford could feel the intense charge between his body and Dan's, acute now that the gates had opened. He could find no words delicate enough for the moment, but Dan said, "Thank you for doing this. May I callyouFord?"
"Yes. Please."
"Thank youfor doingthis, Ford. I've wanted to talk to you for a longtime, but I've never had the guts to do anythingabout it."
"I never would have either,"Ford said, "before now. So listen, I'll call you next week about arrangements, right? You'll be here?"
here?"
Allison Roe greeted Ford coolly as he adjusted his chair. "Getting acquainted with hospital administrators, Dr. McKinney?"
"I was just thanking him for his help with the beds last week when we had the bus accident."Ford made a business of getting his napkininplace.
This exchange seemed small enough at the time but took on more significance as days passed. The short walk across the cafeteria divided his life by apprehension, beginning withAllison Roe's silken remarks. What would she say ifshe knew Ford had asked the administrator to dinner? Worse, if she knew the reasonfor the asking? Ifhis other friends found out?
In his pleasant kitchen on a morning when he was free of hospital duties, he understood his courage to be failing. He poured a second cup of coffee and drank it in the early quiet on his side porch, wrapped in a thick sweater against the slight December chill.
"Please."
Ford sat, folding his hands in front of him, careful to place his back to the table of doctors he had abandoned. He spoke at once, in order to forestallparalysis. "I wanted to thank you again for what youdid the other day. Duringthe accident."
Danstillwatched his cereal. "I reallydidn't do verymuch."
A line of red crept up Dan's neck into his face. At once, understanding Dan's fear, Ford lost sight of his own. He said, "I think you did enough."He wanted to make Dan look at him, and continued, "But that isn't whyI sat downhere."
Dan nodded. "I figured that." His voice almost vanished. "I've beenstaringat youever since I sat down. I'msorry."
The statement stunned Ford. An ache welled up in him, and he said, "I came over here to ask you to go to dinner with me. Sometime soon."Speaking now to keep his own breath even. "I was lookingat you, too, youknow."
Ford could detect each change in the man's lowered face, initial disbelief giving way to comprehension. Dan's grip on the cereal spoon tightened till his knuckles were white. He took a longbreathand looked at Ford.
They watched each other in silence. Not since McKenzie had Ford read so much in another face. He felt himself opening and relaxing, drawn to the body across the table as if they were falling toward each other. Ford laughed. "Well. Answer my question."
"Yes, I want to have dinner with you."Shock stillregistered in Dan's expression. "Have youbeenplanningthis for a while?"
"Since last week.Whenever the accident was."
Dan shook his head in wonder. "I've been watching you for a longtime. Since youwere a medicalstudent. I can't believe it."
Ford blushed himself, as if no one had ever admired him before. He glanced back at the table ofphysicians stillengrossed intheir medicaldiscussion. Turningto Danagain, he said, "I need to get back to my ongoing learning experience before my senior resident comes after me. Whencanwe do this?"
They negotiated the date, shy of watching each other but drawing out the process in spite of Ford's need to return to his duties across the cafeteria. Ford was on call for several nights running, and Dan was busy with rehearsals for a musical at a local community theater. They settled on a Friday evening in a week, and Ford noted the engagement in his pocket calendar. This business finished, theysat.
"I don't particularlywant to go right now,"Ford said.
"I don't either,"Dan replied. "I haven't eaten very much of my breakfast. But if I don't get back to my office, I'll never dig myselfout fromunder the morningmail."
They rose from the table together. Standing, Ford could feel the intense charge between his body and Dan's, acute now that the gates had opened. He could find no words delicate enough for the moment, but Dan said, "Thank you for doing this. May I callyouFord?"
"Yes. Please."
"Thank youfor doingthis, Ford. I've wanted to talk to you for a longtime, but I've never had the guts to do anythingabout it."
"I never would have either,"Ford said, "before now. So listen, I'll call you next week about arrangements, right? You'll be here?"
here?"
Allison Roe greeted Ford coolly as he adjusted his chair. "Getting acquainted with hospital administrators, Dr. McKinney?"
"I was just thanking him for his help with the beds last week when we had the bus accident."Ford made a business of getting his napkininplace.
This exchange seemed small enough at the time but took on more significance as days passed. The short walk across the cafeteria divided his life by apprehension, beginning withAllison Roe's silken remarks. What would she say ifshe knew Ford had asked the administrator to dinner? Worse, if she knew the reasonfor the asking? Ifhis other friends found out?
In his pleasant kitchen on a morning when he was free of hospital duties, he understood his courage to be failing. He poured a second cup of coffee and drank it in the early quiet on his side porch, wrapped in a thick sweater against the slight December chill.
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