hear the music of the party thudding through the walls. I focus on that, trying to think beyond my spinning head.
‘No, I want to go back downstairs,’ I say.
I try to pull away but he won’t let me and starts kissing my neck. Suddenly I’m scared. This should not be happening, not here, not with me like this. He’s moving way too fast but I can’t stop him.
‘I mean it, Lucas. I don’t want to do this.’
He still won’t stop.
‘Are you listening? Get off me!’ I push him, just as Christian walks into the room. He grabs Lucas, shoves him against the wall.
‘What is your problem?’ Lucas scowls and I get a flash of all the times he’s turned his nose upat people before. I see the faces of all my friends as they’ve politely avoided saying they don’t like him. And I was wondering why they didn’t give him a chance. Now I know. He’s called
Diplobrat
for a reason.
‘My friend wants you to leave,’ says Christian.
All I can do is nod. I want him out of here and out of my home. He pushes past Christian and out of the room.
Christian drags me out to the garden to get some fresh air. It’s where I used to play on the swings we had when I was a little girl. I remember swinging backwards and forwards, making myself go higher and higher till the frame started rocking on the grass. I’d keep going, shifting the whole frame, until someone made me stop.
I can’t believe I’ve been so stupid, but in case I don’t realise it, Christian reminds me. ‘You’re stupid, Kat,’ he says.
‘You’re stupid,’ I say back.
‘What are you doing drinking like that? Do you think it makes you cool?’
‘No,’ I say.
Christian seems really angry. ‘Cause it doesn’t. It wrecks things. And that guy – did you like him?’
I start to say yes and then I realise that’s not true. ‘Not really. I just wanted someone to like me for once.’ And then I burst into tears again. It must be the alcohol. I don’t do tears normally.
Christian passes me a bottle of water and makes me drink. ‘I’ll get Ethan,’ he says.
‘No, he’d freak. Anyway, he’ll be with Tara … because she’s perfect and he’s perfect and perfect people attract each other. I’m seriously not perfect.’
‘Don’t worry, I’m not perfect either.’ Christian smiles at me.
‘Nope. I’ve always thought that you and I are the same.’
He looks at me, in a way that Lucas never did, like he sees me, not just the good time.
‘Seriously un-perfect,’ I say, and it’s the greatest compliment I can pay. He’s a real person with faults and moods and problems. Right now, real is what I need more than anything. I kiss him, a very real kiss.
It’s a total moment of un-perfection that blocks out Lucas, the party, my head, my pink cakey skin, everything. Until Christian pulls away from the kiss. In the distance I see Tara’s finally arrived at the party. She’s standing with Ethan but then she runs off when she sees Christian and me. Christian goesafter her. By the time I get to Ethan, Christian and Tara have both vanished. Could my party get any more surreal?
‘Did I miss something? What just happened?’ I ask Ethan. He has no idea. He’s as confused as I am.
‘I’ll call her,’ I say. When I look at my phone there’s a message. It’s been beeping at me for a while but I’ve ignored it. When I open it there’s a picture attached which explains why they’ve both disappeared. Someone’s sent me a photo of Christian and Tara on the beach, kissing.
CHAPTER 10
Not forgetting that birthday party in a hurry. The police end up being called and there’s a fight. It seems like at least fifty per cent of the jelly shots didn’t make it into anyone’s mouths and are staining Natasha’s pure wool Persian rugs. Bad news travels fast. She hears about ‘the night to forget’ even in Estonia and attempts some strict parental authority over the phone.
Everyone gets detention from Mr Kennedy and I’m put on probation.
‘No, I want to go back downstairs,’ I say.
I try to pull away but he won’t let me and starts kissing my neck. Suddenly I’m scared. This should not be happening, not here, not with me like this. He’s moving way too fast but I can’t stop him.
‘I mean it, Lucas. I don’t want to do this.’
He still won’t stop.
‘Are you listening? Get off me!’ I push him, just as Christian walks into the room. He grabs Lucas, shoves him against the wall.
‘What is your problem?’ Lucas scowls and I get a flash of all the times he’s turned his nose upat people before. I see the faces of all my friends as they’ve politely avoided saying they don’t like him. And I was wondering why they didn’t give him a chance. Now I know. He’s called
Diplobrat
for a reason.
‘My friend wants you to leave,’ says Christian.
All I can do is nod. I want him out of here and out of my home. He pushes past Christian and out of the room.
Christian drags me out to the garden to get some fresh air. It’s where I used to play on the swings we had when I was a little girl. I remember swinging backwards and forwards, making myself go higher and higher till the frame started rocking on the grass. I’d keep going, shifting the whole frame, until someone made me stop.
I can’t believe I’ve been so stupid, but in case I don’t realise it, Christian reminds me. ‘You’re stupid, Kat,’ he says.
‘You’re stupid,’ I say back.
‘What are you doing drinking like that? Do you think it makes you cool?’
‘No,’ I say.
Christian seems really angry. ‘Cause it doesn’t. It wrecks things. And that guy – did you like him?’
I start to say yes and then I realise that’s not true. ‘Not really. I just wanted someone to like me for once.’ And then I burst into tears again. It must be the alcohol. I don’t do tears normally.
Christian passes me a bottle of water and makes me drink. ‘I’ll get Ethan,’ he says.
‘No, he’d freak. Anyway, he’ll be with Tara … because she’s perfect and he’s perfect and perfect people attract each other. I’m seriously not perfect.’
‘Don’t worry, I’m not perfect either.’ Christian smiles at me.
‘Nope. I’ve always thought that you and I are the same.’
He looks at me, in a way that Lucas never did, like he sees me, not just the good time.
‘Seriously un-perfect,’ I say, and it’s the greatest compliment I can pay. He’s a real person with faults and moods and problems. Right now, real is what I need more than anything. I kiss him, a very real kiss.
It’s a total moment of un-perfection that blocks out Lucas, the party, my head, my pink cakey skin, everything. Until Christian pulls away from the kiss. In the distance I see Tara’s finally arrived at the party. She’s standing with Ethan but then she runs off when she sees Christian and me. Christian goesafter her. By the time I get to Ethan, Christian and Tara have both vanished. Could my party get any more surreal?
‘Did I miss something? What just happened?’ I ask Ethan. He has no idea. He’s as confused as I am.
‘I’ll call her,’ I say. When I look at my phone there’s a message. It’s been beeping at me for a while but I’ve ignored it. When I open it there’s a picture attached which explains why they’ve both disappeared. Someone’s sent me a photo of Christian and Tara on the beach, kissing.
CHAPTER 10
Not forgetting that birthday party in a hurry. The police end up being called and there’s a fight. It seems like at least fifty per cent of the jelly shots didn’t make it into anyone’s mouths and are staining Natasha’s pure wool Persian rugs. Bad news travels fast. She hears about ‘the night to forget’ even in Estonia and attempts some strict parental authority over the phone.
Everyone gets detention from Mr Kennedy and I’m put on probation.
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