look at her feet and ignore me. So that was cool.
I pretty much forgot about that, though, when I ran into Austin. We nearly crashed head-on in the hallway, looked up, saw each other, and then did everything we could to hastily side-step each other and move on. As he walked away, I heard some guy shout something to him that I couldn’t quite make out. I spent my next class period wondering if Sarah and I’s lie had had negative consequences for Austin somehow, and I walked around with a heavy heart for the rest of the day.
Sarah wasn’t much help, and the reason for that was obvious: Sam Heath spoke to her. It was while we were at her locker together, and it wasn’t much: just a sly “cute” as he eyed the two of us up and down while on his way to class, but I thought Sarah might burst out into song at any moment, and I had to elbow her in the side to remind her she was supposed to be into me and not Sam. It wasn’t until Sarah’d already gone off to her next class that I saw Jessa glance at me from just a few lockers down, and realized that if she’d seen that entire exchange, we were probably screwed.
And as if that wasn’t nerve-wracking enough, I also had a pop quiz.
It all wasn’t as bad as yesterday had been, but it wasn’t great, either, and I still left school feeling terrible. Sarah and I walked out to her car together; she planned to drive me home today so we could finally share what we’d learned last night. Before we could get into her car, however, the last person I expected to see trying to talk to me jogged over to us.
Austin’s hands were shoved into his pockets and his lanky form was hunched over just slightly, like he was trying to humble himself. His eyes darted back and forth between us as he cleared his throat uncomfortably, and I nearly jumped when I felt Sarah’s arm snake possessively around my waist.
“What do you want, Austin?” she asked him, and I could practically sense her eyes narrowing at my side. I wondered how hilarious she was finding this, inwardly.
“Uh… can I talk to you, Katie?” he asked, his voice quiet. “I promise it’ll be quick.”
“It’s fine,” I said, both to him and to Sarah, and he nodded his thanks, turning and walking away. I followed, and when we were out of Sarah’s earshot, he paused and faced me, letting out a sigh and squeezing his eyes shut.
“Okay.” He looked at me. “The whole school’s saying you and Sarah are…”
“Yeah,” I interrupted swiftly, biting my lip. “I know.”
“So that… back there, she was-” He cut himself off and glanced behind me, where Sarah stood, probably watching us. “I just wanted to know if that… if that was why we… why you ended things with us.” His eyes found his feet. “Everyone’s saying I turned you gay.”
I watched him carefully for a moment. The heavy feeling in my chest intensified, and I didn’t know what to tell him. Which was better: To lie and tell him I’d left him for Sarah, or to be honest and say I’d left him because I just didn’t want to be with him? I wasn’t even sure being left for a girl was preferable to being left for no one at all.
“You didn’t turn me gay, Austin,” I said at last. “People either are gay or they aren’t. Anyone who tries to tell you you ruined guys for me is full of crap.”
That answer didn’t seem to satisfy him. “Look, all I’m saying is that you broke up with me without any explanation. I’m trying to get one now.”
“Why now?” I asked him. “I wanted to talk to you right after it happened, but you ignored me.”
“Yeah, I was a little pissed,” he shot back. “Can you blame me? You were the girl of my dreams and you dumped me.”
I sighed, trying to keep calm. “I get that. I do. But I still wanted to be friends. I still want to now .”
“Well, I don’t know if I’m ready for that,” he said. “But it might help to know that at least you were just gay and I didn’t do anything wrong. You
I pretty much forgot about that, though, when I ran into Austin. We nearly crashed head-on in the hallway, looked up, saw each other, and then did everything we could to hastily side-step each other and move on. As he walked away, I heard some guy shout something to him that I couldn’t quite make out. I spent my next class period wondering if Sarah and I’s lie had had negative consequences for Austin somehow, and I walked around with a heavy heart for the rest of the day.
Sarah wasn’t much help, and the reason for that was obvious: Sam Heath spoke to her. It was while we were at her locker together, and it wasn’t much: just a sly “cute” as he eyed the two of us up and down while on his way to class, but I thought Sarah might burst out into song at any moment, and I had to elbow her in the side to remind her she was supposed to be into me and not Sam. It wasn’t until Sarah’d already gone off to her next class that I saw Jessa glance at me from just a few lockers down, and realized that if she’d seen that entire exchange, we were probably screwed.
And as if that wasn’t nerve-wracking enough, I also had a pop quiz.
It all wasn’t as bad as yesterday had been, but it wasn’t great, either, and I still left school feeling terrible. Sarah and I walked out to her car together; she planned to drive me home today so we could finally share what we’d learned last night. Before we could get into her car, however, the last person I expected to see trying to talk to me jogged over to us.
Austin’s hands were shoved into his pockets and his lanky form was hunched over just slightly, like he was trying to humble himself. His eyes darted back and forth between us as he cleared his throat uncomfortably, and I nearly jumped when I felt Sarah’s arm snake possessively around my waist.
“What do you want, Austin?” she asked him, and I could practically sense her eyes narrowing at my side. I wondered how hilarious she was finding this, inwardly.
“Uh… can I talk to you, Katie?” he asked, his voice quiet. “I promise it’ll be quick.”
“It’s fine,” I said, both to him and to Sarah, and he nodded his thanks, turning and walking away. I followed, and when we were out of Sarah’s earshot, he paused and faced me, letting out a sigh and squeezing his eyes shut.
“Okay.” He looked at me. “The whole school’s saying you and Sarah are…”
“Yeah,” I interrupted swiftly, biting my lip. “I know.”
“So that… back there, she was-” He cut himself off and glanced behind me, where Sarah stood, probably watching us. “I just wanted to know if that… if that was why we… why you ended things with us.” His eyes found his feet. “Everyone’s saying I turned you gay.”
I watched him carefully for a moment. The heavy feeling in my chest intensified, and I didn’t know what to tell him. Which was better: To lie and tell him I’d left him for Sarah, or to be honest and say I’d left him because I just didn’t want to be with him? I wasn’t even sure being left for a girl was preferable to being left for no one at all.
“You didn’t turn me gay, Austin,” I said at last. “People either are gay or they aren’t. Anyone who tries to tell you you ruined guys for me is full of crap.”
That answer didn’t seem to satisfy him. “Look, all I’m saying is that you broke up with me without any explanation. I’m trying to get one now.”
“Why now?” I asked him. “I wanted to talk to you right after it happened, but you ignored me.”
“Yeah, I was a little pissed,” he shot back. “Can you blame me? You were the girl of my dreams and you dumped me.”
I sighed, trying to keep calm. “I get that. I do. But I still wanted to be friends. I still want to now .”
“Well, I don’t know if I’m ready for that,” he said. “But it might help to know that at least you were just gay and I didn’t do anything wrong. You
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