Deep Surrendering: Episode Six by Chelsea M. Cameron Page B

see what you did there.”
    “Do you approve?”
    “Of a random Friends reference? Always.” We started talking about other things, and I felt the tension that had seized my body last night ease up a little.
    “This makes me really want to go swimming, and not in a pool.” The beach was another place where I hadn’t been in a long time. When had I stopped doing things like that? Probably when I entered college and didn’t have time for things like fun and sleep anymore.
    I’d had fun with Fin. He loved doing goofy things. Hell, our first date had been on a Duckboat.
    “You’re smiling, so I’m guessing you’re thinking about him,” Chloe said, picking up on my thoughts. I was so easy to read, and I hated it.
    “Yeah. On our first date, he rented an entire Duckboat. I thought he was crazy and that it was too expensive, but he didn’t seem to care.”
    Chloe sighed. “Listen. I can’t tell you what to do in this situation. I really can’t. But here’s the thing. Sometimes you can make decisions and choose a path, and you end up on another one anyway. I don’t really believe in fate, but I do believe that some things happen for a reason and we need to give up and let go of control. You’ll drive yourself insane if you try to control life. You can’t. I mean, you can’t control if you walk outside and are hit by a taxi, or if you get cancer, or fall in love, or lose your job or a million other things. What’s going to happen will happen. That’s what I think about you and Fin. But if you’re unhappy, then you should definitely not stay with him. It’s okay to put yourself first when it comes to relationships. I learned that one the hard way.” Her face fell, and I knew exactly who she was talking about. Harmony, her ex, made her life miserable, but she’d been too blinded by love to see it.
    “Anyway, that’s my two cents. Take it or leave it.” I leaned toward her and she put her arm around me. “Things will work out. They don’t for everyone, but I think they will for you. I have a feeling.” She rubbed my shoulder, and I inhaled her perfume. Chloe might not be a very conventional girl, but she always wore Chanel No. 5. I asked her why, but she never told me.
    “And what about you?” I asked.
    She paused before she answered, “I don’t know. I thought I had my great love, and it turned out not to be. I guess I’m just trying to accept the fact that I could be alone, and that’s okay. I might meet someone, but if I don’t, I can deal with being by myself. I couldn’t for a long time, but I think I can now. Or I’m just going to end up with a shit ton of cats.”
    I lifted my head from where it rested on her shoulder. “But you’re allergic to cats.”
    “Exactly.”
     

     
    Watching the jellyfish did help me stop thinking for a little while and get a bit of mental clarity. After that, Chloe and I went to the movies for a double feature of Grease and Footloose (the original, thank you very much). We sang along and danced in the aisles, and generally had a foolish and fun time.
    “We need to do things like this more,” I said as we left the theater and tossed our empty popcorn buckets in the trash. We’d decided to have “dinner” at the theater which consisted of popcorn, Milk Duds, and Starburst. Chloe had a grand explanation of how popcorn was made from corn, which was a vegetable, and butter was dairy, and Starburst were fruit, and that somehow made it a healthy meal. I just went with it.
    “Yeah, we do. Definitely. We also need to play hooky more. I didn’t realize how fucking stressed I was until I got out of that place.” Funny that managing a spa would be a stressful job. You’d think all the deep breathing and calming energy would make it a chill place to be. But no.
    “I don’t know about that, but we need to make more time for just the two of us.”
    She nodded and gave me a greasy smooch on the cheek. “You know I love you, right?” she said.
    I put my arm