they headed back to base. My mission planning software would update in real time and I monitored it to make sure the second mission had what it needed.
* * *
The second mission would take full advantage of the destroyed scanning post and hit the main air base on the island with an intensive air to ground assault. As far back as basic officers school we are told to use the equipment we had in the most efficient manner when planning offensive missions. If your best planes were ground pounders, then plan accordingly. In this case, the Swifts were much better at hitting ground based targets then mixing it up with KiVs in a furball. The fact that the previous commander had used it as a fighter and not an attack weapon was probably more a product of his ego and Fleet mentality than anything. It simply wasn’t sexy hitting ground targets. Fleet pilots were air to air or air to space fighters, not ground pounders.
I never thought of trying to kill anyone as being sexy. It was a horrific crime outside of war. The only thing that made it tolerable for me was the fact that we were at war. I never let the desire to win blind me to what I was actually doing. Killing. Sure they were not the same as me, they were not even human, but they were living beings. Had we not been at war, I would have treated them with the utmost respect that any sentient life commanded.
Of course I didn’t start the war thinking like that. After Hap was killed before my eyes I became blinded by revenge and hatred for the enemy. My first several years in the military were spent trying to avenge her death by killing as many Votainions as I could. I was ruthless and I was deadly. Sometimes I went too far and crossed over the line to murdering them. But I had to live with my mistakes and that turned out to be more than I could handle. As a result I suffered nightmares that robbed me of sleep and tormented my days.
Mental disabilities would ground a pilot faster than she could check her six. So I kept my pain inside and never reported it. I’m quite certain that one day I won’t be able to deal with that anguish in a proper manner and it will be the end of me. But until then, I will carry on alone in my struggle to maintain my sanity. It helps to occupy myself with positions of leadership. Being in command forces me to think of others instead of myself. This keeps my own demons at bay and focuses me. Otherwise I’d be sitting in a mental hospital right now. Or worse.
After the first mission landed and the pilots were debriefed I gathered in Ops with the second mission’s pilots and started their briefing. It was not as long as the first one, everyone in the single flight would be hitting ground targets and then turning tail for home. If we were successful, the enemy would be on edge and wondering when the next attack would come and that would cause them to increase patrols to defend themselves. This is what I wanted. More opportunities to take them down in their own backyard instead of fighting them in our yard.
I lead the second attack with Sweetness as my wingman. She was just as aggressive in the air as she was in the weight room. By the time our flight was finished the enemy base looked like it was completely on fire. We destroyed hangers, fuel dumps and about half a dozen KiVs on the ground. According to our Intel, not all the KiVs were at the base, which meant they were airborne and probably looking for us.
Sure enough, as we headed back home and regained our altitude we encountered them coming at us.
There were six of them and only four of us. We didn’t have the element of surprise because it looked like they were expecting us judging by their aggressive stance. We were engaging before anyone could get set. Sweetness stayed on my wing as I engaged the first set of three enemy fighters. They immediately tried to turn with us but we didn’t play their game, we played
our
game and tore through them with guns blazing. In a matter of seconds I had
* * *
The second mission would take full advantage of the destroyed scanning post and hit the main air base on the island with an intensive air to ground assault. As far back as basic officers school we are told to use the equipment we had in the most efficient manner when planning offensive missions. If your best planes were ground pounders, then plan accordingly. In this case, the Swifts were much better at hitting ground based targets then mixing it up with KiVs in a furball. The fact that the previous commander had used it as a fighter and not an attack weapon was probably more a product of his ego and Fleet mentality than anything. It simply wasn’t sexy hitting ground targets. Fleet pilots were air to air or air to space fighters, not ground pounders.
I never thought of trying to kill anyone as being sexy. It was a horrific crime outside of war. The only thing that made it tolerable for me was the fact that we were at war. I never let the desire to win blind me to what I was actually doing. Killing. Sure they were not the same as me, they were not even human, but they were living beings. Had we not been at war, I would have treated them with the utmost respect that any sentient life commanded.
Of course I didn’t start the war thinking like that. After Hap was killed before my eyes I became blinded by revenge and hatred for the enemy. My first several years in the military were spent trying to avenge her death by killing as many Votainions as I could. I was ruthless and I was deadly. Sometimes I went too far and crossed over the line to murdering them. But I had to live with my mistakes and that turned out to be more than I could handle. As a result I suffered nightmares that robbed me of sleep and tormented my days.
Mental disabilities would ground a pilot faster than she could check her six. So I kept my pain inside and never reported it. I’m quite certain that one day I won’t be able to deal with that anguish in a proper manner and it will be the end of me. But until then, I will carry on alone in my struggle to maintain my sanity. It helps to occupy myself with positions of leadership. Being in command forces me to think of others instead of myself. This keeps my own demons at bay and focuses me. Otherwise I’d be sitting in a mental hospital right now. Or worse.
After the first mission landed and the pilots were debriefed I gathered in Ops with the second mission’s pilots and started their briefing. It was not as long as the first one, everyone in the single flight would be hitting ground targets and then turning tail for home. If we were successful, the enemy would be on edge and wondering when the next attack would come and that would cause them to increase patrols to defend themselves. This is what I wanted. More opportunities to take them down in their own backyard instead of fighting them in our yard.
I lead the second attack with Sweetness as my wingman. She was just as aggressive in the air as she was in the weight room. By the time our flight was finished the enemy base looked like it was completely on fire. We destroyed hangers, fuel dumps and about half a dozen KiVs on the ground. According to our Intel, not all the KiVs were at the base, which meant they were airborne and probably looking for us.
Sure enough, as we headed back home and regained our altitude we encountered them coming at us.
There were six of them and only four of us. We didn’t have the element of surprise because it looked like they were expecting us judging by their aggressive stance. We were engaging before anyone could get set. Sweetness stayed on my wing as I engaged the first set of three enemy fighters. They immediately tried to turn with us but we didn’t play their game, we played
our
game and tore through them with guns blazing. In a matter of seconds I had
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