were really expensive and hard to get – Jack was always going on about it. He’d
have killed for Alex’s spare ticket.
I had no idea what to do. I sat staring at the screen, while the cursor blinked furiously at me. Go on, it dared. Blink. Make a decision. Write back to Alex. She’ll know you’re home
now and will have read her message. She’s waiting for you. Go on. Blink.
Hard as I tried, I couldn’t make up my mind what to do. I toyed with a few possible responses:
I’d love to come,
I typed.
Unfortunately, we’re going on holiday on Friday. And
I wanted to add,
we’re never coming back.
Delete.
I would have liked to come but I have terrible toothache and Saturday afternoon is the only time I can get an appointment with the dentist.
Delete.
I’d love to meet you, but I might have forgotten to mention that I have this embarrassing skin condition that makes me come out in great, big puss-filled boils, and the doctor says it
might be contagious.
Delete.
Did I say I liked football? Well, I lied. And, by the way, my name isn’t really Laura, it’s Lily. I’m not your friend. I’ve been using you to get information about
your ex-boyfriend.
Funny how the most outlandish, absurd excuse of all was the true one. Seeing my confession spelled out in black type made me feel sick. I left it sitting on the screen for a while, daring myself
to send it, a part of me wanting to send it and end the charade. A little fly – too tiny even to scare me – was buzzing around the room and I wondered what would happen if it landed on
the return key and took the decision out of my hands. I watched it as if flew towards me, but as it neared the keyboard it seemed to change its mind and spin around, heading for the window.
‘Well, you’re no help!’ I called after it. ‘Useless insect.’ Maybe fate could help. I took a coin out of my purse. ‘Right, heads I go to the match. Tails I send
this message and probably have to leave the country.’ It landed tail side up. ‘All right, best of three.’ Tails again. ‘Best of five, then . . .’
In the end, I did what I always do when I can’t make a decision on my own: I rang Katie.
‘You’ve got to go,’ she said, after repeating, ‘Oh my God!’ about thirty times, each time sounding a fraction more excited. Her attitude towards my deception had
changed since I’d heard back from Alex. Now, she wanted the whole thing over with as quickly as possible. ‘You’ve been messaging each other for weeks and you still haven’t
found out anything juicy. Meet her and you’ll finally be able to get the dirt on Jack.’
I tutted. ‘I’ve told you, I can’t just ask her straight out. The subject hasn’t come up.’ If I sounded irritated, it was because Katie asked me whether Alex had
told me anything about Jack yet virtually every time I brought her name up. It was almost as if she wanted to know more than I did. She didn’t understand how difficult it was to steer our
conversations round to personal things I wasn’t even supposed to know about.
‘Yeah, but if you meet her, you might get the opportunity to ask. And at least you’ll get to know her a bit better.’
‘That’s true. But I feel really bad about the idea. Talking to someone on the net isn’t like real life. I mean, I know it is, but people sort of accept that you’re not
completely being yourself when you message them, don’t they? Everybody is cleverer and funnier and has a better personality online. Everyone lies a bit. If I meet Alex I have to lie to her
face and I’ll be letting her dad pay for my ticket, and that seems really wrong.’
‘Making up Laura in the first place was bad. Pretending to be Alex’s friend was bad. Why is meeting her any worse?’
‘I guess you’re right. It’s not worse, it’s just more real. So maybe I should just bail out now. I could delete Laura’s account, make her disappear, and Alex
wouldn’t be able to find any trace of
have killed for Alex’s spare ticket.
I had no idea what to do. I sat staring at the screen, while the cursor blinked furiously at me. Go on, it dared. Blink. Make a decision. Write back to Alex. She’ll know you’re home
now and will have read her message. She’s waiting for you. Go on. Blink.
Hard as I tried, I couldn’t make up my mind what to do. I toyed with a few possible responses:
I’d love to come,
I typed.
Unfortunately, we’re going on holiday on Friday. And
I wanted to add,
we’re never coming back.
Delete.
I would have liked to come but I have terrible toothache and Saturday afternoon is the only time I can get an appointment with the dentist.
Delete.
I’d love to meet you, but I might have forgotten to mention that I have this embarrassing skin condition that makes me come out in great, big puss-filled boils, and the doctor says it
might be contagious.
Delete.
Did I say I liked football? Well, I lied. And, by the way, my name isn’t really Laura, it’s Lily. I’m not your friend. I’ve been using you to get information about
your ex-boyfriend.
Funny how the most outlandish, absurd excuse of all was the true one. Seeing my confession spelled out in black type made me feel sick. I left it sitting on the screen for a while, daring myself
to send it, a part of me wanting to send it and end the charade. A little fly – too tiny even to scare me – was buzzing around the room and I wondered what would happen if it landed on
the return key and took the decision out of my hands. I watched it as if flew towards me, but as it neared the keyboard it seemed to change its mind and spin around, heading for the window.
‘Well, you’re no help!’ I called after it. ‘Useless insect.’ Maybe fate could help. I took a coin out of my purse. ‘Right, heads I go to the match. Tails I send
this message and probably have to leave the country.’ It landed tail side up. ‘All right, best of three.’ Tails again. ‘Best of five, then . . .’
In the end, I did what I always do when I can’t make a decision on my own: I rang Katie.
‘You’ve got to go,’ she said, after repeating, ‘Oh my God!’ about thirty times, each time sounding a fraction more excited. Her attitude towards my deception had
changed since I’d heard back from Alex. Now, she wanted the whole thing over with as quickly as possible. ‘You’ve been messaging each other for weeks and you still haven’t
found out anything juicy. Meet her and you’ll finally be able to get the dirt on Jack.’
I tutted. ‘I’ve told you, I can’t just ask her straight out. The subject hasn’t come up.’ If I sounded irritated, it was because Katie asked me whether Alex had
told me anything about Jack yet virtually every time I brought her name up. It was almost as if she wanted to know more than I did. She didn’t understand how difficult it was to steer our
conversations round to personal things I wasn’t even supposed to know about.
‘Yeah, but if you meet her, you might get the opportunity to ask. And at least you’ll get to know her a bit better.’
‘That’s true. But I feel really bad about the idea. Talking to someone on the net isn’t like real life. I mean, I know it is, but people sort of accept that you’re not
completely being yourself when you message them, don’t they? Everybody is cleverer and funnier and has a better personality online. Everyone lies a bit. If I meet Alex I have to lie to her
face and I’ll be letting her dad pay for my ticket, and that seems really wrong.’
‘Making up Laura in the first place was bad. Pretending to be Alex’s friend was bad. Why is meeting her any worse?’
‘I guess you’re right. It’s not worse, it’s just more real. So maybe I should just bail out now. I could delete Laura’s account, make her disappear, and Alex
wouldn’t be able to find any trace of
Similar Books
