Don't Stop Me Now by Jeremy Clarkson Page B
Authors: Jeremy Clarkson
Tags: Humor / General, Automobiles
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drove me mad before I was even out of Knightsbridge.
These, though, are niggles, and I’ll find just as many in any car. Overall, there is no single reason why you should not buy or dream about buying this car. Unfortunately, there is also no single reason why you should.
With the new Phantom, BMW seems to have captured the essence of Rolls-Royce, but I have to say that VW has failed to pull off a similar trick with the Continental. Put simply, it feels like a big, fabulous, fast, well-engineered Volkswagen.
I couldn’t help thinking, as it hauled me down the A303, that I’d have enjoyed the drive more in an Arnage. Oh, it would have been noisier and less fast and it would have fallen apart on the twisting lanes of Devon, if it had got that far without breaking in some way.
But the old Brit Bruiser has a grandeur that the Continental lacks somehow. There’s no sense of occasion when you step inside. It’s a car you can respect, but not love.
Let me put it this way: as I drove away from that beachthe other night, in a rented Nissan Primera, I wasn’t saddened that I’d had to leave the Bentley behind. It had been, when all is said and done, just another car.
Sunday 26 October 2003
Porsche Cayenne Turbo
Last week it was disclosed that a company which once held shares in a firm that made the cyanide gas for the concentration camps is helping to build Germany’s Holocaust memorial. And of course, there was much brouhaha.
I wonder how much longer this sort of thing will go on. Am I to be prevented from drinking Red Stripe because my great-great grandfather was bosun on one of the slave ships? Should you be ejected from your local curry house because your great-uncle’s second cousin fired some of the shots at Amritsar?
If so, then it will be awfully difficult to buy a new car. Obviously a Volkswagen, BMW or Mercedes are right out because they powered the U-boats and built the tanks and made the planes that dropped the bombs.
So how about a Subaru Impreza, or a Mitsubishi of some kind. I’m sorry. Have you forgotten about the bridge over the River Kwai? Do you not recall Alec Guinness in that box?
And you can forget about a new Fiat. First, it comes from the country that gave the world Mussolini, and second, it will break down.
I’d like to say that you can have a Saab. But we can’t pretend the story of Reeve Beaduheard didn’t happen.He met what he supposed was a fleet of Norse trading ships and directed the sailors to the nearby royal estate. For his troubles he was rewarded with an axe in the face. It’s hard to forgive and forget that sort of thing.
And that’s before we get to the muddy wartime history of Porsche. Although the founder of the company, Ferry Porsche, was cleared of any wrongdoings by everyone except the French, he was undoubtedly involved in the Nazi apparatus.
Having served as Archduke Ferdinand’s chauffeur, a job with no future, Porsche met Hitler at a race meeting in the 1920s and the two became friends. His company made military vehicles, tanks and parts for V-1 rockets. And Porsche was an honorary SS officer. But if you’re looking for a good reason not to buy one of the new Cayennes, you can do better.
It has been on the market for some time now and, to be honest, I haven’t bothered reviewing it. I didn’t see the point. People, I figured, will not dream about owning a car as ugly as this, and even if they are immune to its aesthetic forcefield they will be stumped by the
£
70,000 price tag.
What was Porsche thinking of? An SUV off-roader? That’s like the board of directors at Lurpak deciding to branch out into video recorders. What’s more, I keep reading stories in the specialist press about the problems Porsche is having. Demand, apparently, was massively overestimated, and now smaller-engined, cheaper alternatives are being rushed into production to take up the slack.
However, there’s no getting away from the fact that the damn things are everywhere.
These, though, are niggles, and I’ll find just as many in any car. Overall, there is no single reason why you should not buy or dream about buying this car. Unfortunately, there is also no single reason why you should.
With the new Phantom, BMW seems to have captured the essence of Rolls-Royce, but I have to say that VW has failed to pull off a similar trick with the Continental. Put simply, it feels like a big, fabulous, fast, well-engineered Volkswagen.
I couldn’t help thinking, as it hauled me down the A303, that I’d have enjoyed the drive more in an Arnage. Oh, it would have been noisier and less fast and it would have fallen apart on the twisting lanes of Devon, if it had got that far without breaking in some way.
But the old Brit Bruiser has a grandeur that the Continental lacks somehow. There’s no sense of occasion when you step inside. It’s a car you can respect, but not love.
Let me put it this way: as I drove away from that beachthe other night, in a rented Nissan Primera, I wasn’t saddened that I’d had to leave the Bentley behind. It had been, when all is said and done, just another car.
Sunday 26 October 2003
Porsche Cayenne Turbo
Last week it was disclosed that a company which once held shares in a firm that made the cyanide gas for the concentration camps is helping to build Germany’s Holocaust memorial. And of course, there was much brouhaha.
I wonder how much longer this sort of thing will go on. Am I to be prevented from drinking Red Stripe because my great-great grandfather was bosun on one of the slave ships? Should you be ejected from your local curry house because your great-uncle’s second cousin fired some of the shots at Amritsar?
If so, then it will be awfully difficult to buy a new car. Obviously a Volkswagen, BMW or Mercedes are right out because they powered the U-boats and built the tanks and made the planes that dropped the bombs.
So how about a Subaru Impreza, or a Mitsubishi of some kind. I’m sorry. Have you forgotten about the bridge over the River Kwai? Do you not recall Alec Guinness in that box?
And you can forget about a new Fiat. First, it comes from the country that gave the world Mussolini, and second, it will break down.
I’d like to say that you can have a Saab. But we can’t pretend the story of Reeve Beaduheard didn’t happen.He met what he supposed was a fleet of Norse trading ships and directed the sailors to the nearby royal estate. For his troubles he was rewarded with an axe in the face. It’s hard to forgive and forget that sort of thing.
And that’s before we get to the muddy wartime history of Porsche. Although the founder of the company, Ferry Porsche, was cleared of any wrongdoings by everyone except the French, he was undoubtedly involved in the Nazi apparatus.
Having served as Archduke Ferdinand’s chauffeur, a job with no future, Porsche met Hitler at a race meeting in the 1920s and the two became friends. His company made military vehicles, tanks and parts for V-1 rockets. And Porsche was an honorary SS officer. But if you’re looking for a good reason not to buy one of the new Cayennes, you can do better.
It has been on the market for some time now and, to be honest, I haven’t bothered reviewing it. I didn’t see the point. People, I figured, will not dream about owning a car as ugly as this, and even if they are immune to its aesthetic forcefield they will be stumped by the
£
70,000 price tag.
What was Porsche thinking of? An SUV off-roader? That’s like the board of directors at Lurpak deciding to branch out into video recorders. What’s more, I keep reading stories in the specialist press about the problems Porsche is having. Demand, apparently, was massively overestimated, and now smaller-engined, cheaper alternatives are being rushed into production to take up the slack.
However, there’s no getting away from the fact that the damn things are everywhere.
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