Dying to Have Her by Heather Graham

… a brother. A spoiled, willful brother. Or perhaps the child she didn’t have—and had thought that she had wanted with him.
    Andy looked her way, smiled, squeezed her hand. She felt guilty. In his way, Andy was a really good guy. He still wanted to get remarried. He brought it up now and then. Hey, Serena, want a cup of coffee? Hey — how about getting married again? Man, it would be so good for the show’s ratings!
    “You okay?” he asked quietly.
    “Yes, of course. In fact …”
    “In fact?”
    “I’m feeling a bit guilty,” she admitted. “I barely knew her.”
    “Well none of us knew her that well. She was just starting with us. But … well, it was terrible,” Andy said. He waved a hand in the air and spoke softly. “An act of God.”
    An act of God! She had heard that term so many times now. But the police had been crawling over the set since the event, so she had heard.
    Seated in the pew behind Andy, with others in the cast and crew of Valentine Valley, Jay Braden sniffed loudly. It was, in fact, Serena decided, a snort.
    “An act of a merciful God!” he muttered.
    “Jay!” Kelly, seated next to him, chastised him swiftly. Serena was surprised; she had seldom heard Jay make such snide comments.
    “She’s dead!” Jennifer whispered to Jay. “Don’t be terrible.”
    “I’m not being terrible. I’m being honest. You guys should never have hired her!” Jay continued, tapping Andy on the shoulder. His voice seemed loud; Serena prayed that it hadn’t carried.
    “Hey! This is a funeral, for God’s sake!” Serena reminded him.
    “She was on a roll. She seemed a good choice at the time,” Andy said dolefully, still looking forward.
    Silence fell over them, and Serena heard the funerary liturgy of the priest, smelled the death-room smell of too many lilies, and breathed in the smoke from the candles that filled the church.
    Dust to dust. Ashes to ashes.
    There was a brief eulogy, given by an old acting teacher. That surprised Serena. If she had been the one killed in an accident, her sister would have spoken for her—or Jennifer. Or even one of these guys. They might have been crude, but their words would have had some emotion in them.
    Soon the service ended. They all stood up and started filing out to the center aisle.
    “A great funeral. Jane would have loved this! Will you look at the crowd!” Joe said.
    “Hey,” Andy murmured, “everyone loves a good funeral.”
    “Everyone loves a good wedding, gentlemen,” Jennifer cut in. “Will you people please behave!”
    “Of course, Jennifer, of course. You’re so right,” Andy said and immediately fell into a semblance of gravity and dignity.
    “What on earth is this going to do to our plot line?” Jim Novac said as they were walking out.
    “We’re not changing anything,” Andy said. “Much.”
    “That’s not what I heard,” Serena said, kicking herself. This was a funeral. And here she was, getting drawn into the conversation. “Allona said on the phone last night that she was going crazy rewriting everything—”
    “Every scene that had Jane in it,” Jim murmured.
    “Our big deal is love and death by Valentine’s Day. The other soaps will be pointing fingers at us, saying, ‘Death—they really mean it over there!’” Serena pointed out.
    “Maybe we should change things,” Andy said.
    “We can’t!” Joe Penny insisted suddenly. “All of our teasers are out already in the soap magazines, the women’s magazines, and newspapers. We have Valentine’s Day contests going on— Who’s the Killer? Who’s the Lover? It All Comes to Light on Valentine Valley!”
    “Who’s the victim has already happened,” Serena said dryly.
    “She isn’t a victim. There was an accident. A very sad accident,” Andy told her. His voice was full of the proper pathos. He doesn’t mean a word of it! she thought. The three of them! They’re all just worried about how a death was going to affect their livelihood!
    Accident.