She curled her fingers around his t-shirt and responded sweetly, but he sensed tension in her body.
He pulled back, looked in to her eyes. “You OK?”
She nodded. “I was thinking…”
“About what?”
“About Jenny.”
He leaned back. “Yeah. Chris moved in this morning, huh?’
“He did. She’s just so determined to do this, you know? To get on with her life, to get past it all.”
“I know.”
“Yeah. You do.”
Their eyes met. Dallas knew exactly what had happened to Jenny six years ago, and even though he and Olivia had never really talked about it, she knew he knew. She wondered how much Chris knew now, when Jenny would tell him everything.
“Anyway,” she said. “I was thinking… if Jenny can be this brave and face down her demons, then what’s stopping me? I mean, hers are way worse than mine, right?”
Dallas looked up. “Hey, this is not a competition, and it’s not a race. People face things when they’re ready. Jenny wasn’t ready before now, and I don’t want you pushing yourself to do anything. Don’t compare yourself to her, and don’t feel bad if you need more time.”
“But you…” she said softly.
“What about me?”
“Will you really wait until I’m ready?”
“Hell, yeah, baby.” He kissed her. “You know that, don’t you?”
“Sometimes.” She spoke in a small voice.
“Well, I want you to know it all the time. You hear me, Olivia? I can wait. I will wait. You tell me when you want to make love, and I’ll be there with bells on and nothing else, sweetheart. Before then? I’m just happy to get in to bed and hold you every night. I need you next to me, Olivia, I need to know that you’re safe and whole. And that’s all I need.” He held her brown eyes. “OK?”
“OK,” she whispered.
“I love you,” he said. “I want you close to me. I need to hold you. Everything else, it can wait.”
**
Jenny looked over at Chris and smiled. They’d spent the whole day at home together, watching movies, cooking, talking. She was astounded that she was as relaxed and comfortable as she was. She hadn’t had a single moment of panic – not even when Chris’ hand accidentally brushed against hers as she handed him the plate of food she’d just dished out for him. She had jumped a bit at the shock of contact, but then she’d looked up into his warm eyes and it had passed.
Chris looked over at her now and smiled back.
“So,” he said. “I think I’ll start to get ready to turn in.”
Jenny glanced at the clock. “This your usual bedtime during the work week?”
“Yeah, mostly. I like to get up early and go to the gym before heading to the garage.”
“Huh.” Her eyes ran over his chest and shoulders in his white t-shirt. “So that’s how you’ve held on to your muscles since leaving active duty.”
He grinned. “Yep. This body doesn’t come naturally, girl.”
She grinned back.
Chris got to his feet and hovered for a few seconds, unsure. “I really want to give you a hug goodnight, but I know it’s way too soon. Can I just touch your hand again?”
Jenny nodded and extended her hands to him, no hesitation at all. He came over to the chair she was in, took both hands gently in his, pulled her to her feet slowly. She went willingly, but then a small stab of fear pulsed in her chest before she could stop it.
Chris stood still, both of her small hands in his huge ones, looking down at her. They stayed like that, just breathing and gazing at each other, and then he carefully squeezed her hands.
“Goodnight, Jenny.”
“Goodnight, Chris.”
She watched him head for the stairs and she sat again, her knees a bit weak under her. She still couldn’t quite believe that she was able to touch him without losing her mind, that she’d let him close to her. More surprisingly, she’d found herself looking at his body all that day, taking note of his chest, his back, his arms.
She knew damn well that in her life before – before it had all
He pulled back, looked in to her eyes. “You OK?”
She nodded. “I was thinking…”
“About what?”
“About Jenny.”
He leaned back. “Yeah. Chris moved in this morning, huh?’
“He did. She’s just so determined to do this, you know? To get on with her life, to get past it all.”
“I know.”
“Yeah. You do.”
Their eyes met. Dallas knew exactly what had happened to Jenny six years ago, and even though he and Olivia had never really talked about it, she knew he knew. She wondered how much Chris knew now, when Jenny would tell him everything.
“Anyway,” she said. “I was thinking… if Jenny can be this brave and face down her demons, then what’s stopping me? I mean, hers are way worse than mine, right?”
Dallas looked up. “Hey, this is not a competition, and it’s not a race. People face things when they’re ready. Jenny wasn’t ready before now, and I don’t want you pushing yourself to do anything. Don’t compare yourself to her, and don’t feel bad if you need more time.”
“But you…” she said softly.
“What about me?”
“Will you really wait until I’m ready?”
“Hell, yeah, baby.” He kissed her. “You know that, don’t you?”
“Sometimes.” She spoke in a small voice.
“Well, I want you to know it all the time. You hear me, Olivia? I can wait. I will wait. You tell me when you want to make love, and I’ll be there with bells on and nothing else, sweetheart. Before then? I’m just happy to get in to bed and hold you every night. I need you next to me, Olivia, I need to know that you’re safe and whole. And that’s all I need.” He held her brown eyes. “OK?”
“OK,” she whispered.
“I love you,” he said. “I want you close to me. I need to hold you. Everything else, it can wait.”
**
Jenny looked over at Chris and smiled. They’d spent the whole day at home together, watching movies, cooking, talking. She was astounded that she was as relaxed and comfortable as she was. She hadn’t had a single moment of panic – not even when Chris’ hand accidentally brushed against hers as she handed him the plate of food she’d just dished out for him. She had jumped a bit at the shock of contact, but then she’d looked up into his warm eyes and it had passed.
Chris looked over at her now and smiled back.
“So,” he said. “I think I’ll start to get ready to turn in.”
Jenny glanced at the clock. “This your usual bedtime during the work week?”
“Yeah, mostly. I like to get up early and go to the gym before heading to the garage.”
“Huh.” Her eyes ran over his chest and shoulders in his white t-shirt. “So that’s how you’ve held on to your muscles since leaving active duty.”
He grinned. “Yep. This body doesn’t come naturally, girl.”
She grinned back.
Chris got to his feet and hovered for a few seconds, unsure. “I really want to give you a hug goodnight, but I know it’s way too soon. Can I just touch your hand again?”
Jenny nodded and extended her hands to him, no hesitation at all. He came over to the chair she was in, took both hands gently in his, pulled her to her feet slowly. She went willingly, but then a small stab of fear pulsed in her chest before she could stop it.
Chris stood still, both of her small hands in his huge ones, looking down at her. They stayed like that, just breathing and gazing at each other, and then he carefully squeezed her hands.
“Goodnight, Jenny.”
“Goodnight, Chris.”
She watched him head for the stairs and she sat again, her knees a bit weak under her. She still couldn’t quite believe that she was able to touch him without losing her mind, that she’d let him close to her. More surprisingly, she’d found herself looking at his body all that day, taking note of his chest, his back, his arms.
She knew damn well that in her life before – before it had all
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