nodded. It had never crossed her mind that he might have minded waking up to find her gone. She thought guys preferred that, actually.
“Second…” He hesitated. “I want to know why you didn’t have sex for almost five years.”
She went very still. “I think that violates rule number one – not telling each other anything too personal.”
Dean looked at her face; it was cold and distant. She looked like she was shutting down on him, and he reached out and took her hand. She tensed.
“Emma,” he said softly. “I’m asking for a very good reason, OK?”
“What is it?”
“I’m worried that something happened to you – that you had a bad experience five years ago. If somebody hurt you or forced you sexually, I do need to know that. You can see that, right?” He touched her cheek. “If you were attacked, and I’m the first guy you’ve been with since it happened, there may be times when you’d feel scared or freaked out. And I’d need to understand what’s going on.”
She stared at him. It had never occurred to her that he’d see her abstinence that way.
“You don’t have to go in to details,” he said. “Just tell me if somebody hurt you.”
She shook her head. “Dean, I was never raped or abused. What happened five years ago wasn’t about that. It was – it was awful. But it had nothing at all to do with sex.”
His eyes held hers. “Yeah? You’re telling me the truth?”
“Yes. I promise you. I wasn’t hurt in that way.”
“You weren’t beaten or… I don’t know… injured? Nothing that I may trigger by accident while we’re in bed together?”
“No.”
He was quiet for a few seconds. “But you won’t tell me what happened?”
“No,” Emma said. “I’ve told you what it wasn’t, and that’s all I’m going to say. Can you live with that?”
Dean looked at her. “Yeah. I can.”
“One more condition,” she said. “Last one.”
“OK.”
“Either one of us can end it at any time. No reasons given, no explanations offered, no guilt or hysterics from the other person. But it does have to be clearly stated. No disappearing forever without a word. We at least owe each other a face-to-face conversation about it being over for good. Deal?”
“Deal,” Dean said. “So. Do we shake on it?”
She shook her head and stood up. “No. We seal this deal another way. Back at your place.”
He stood up too and threw some money on the table. “Sounds good.” He was hard already. “Sounds very good.”
**
Emma felt hands on her back, gently stroking her awake. She made a small sound in her throat, snuggled deeper in to the warmth surrounding her. She raised her hand to adjust her pillow and touched a hard surface. It was breathing. Her eyes popped open and she gasped when she realized that she was lying on a broad chest with blond hair softly tickling her cheek. She lifted her head and looked in to bright green eyes.
“Hey, there,” Dean said in a sexy morning voice, all rough and deep. “How you doing today?”
“Good.”
“Oh, yeah?” His hands were moving lower now, across her hips, over her ass, down the backs of her thighs. “You sleep OK?”
She nodded. “You?”
“Yeah, pretty good.” His hands slid inside her thighs, pressed them apart. “I was damn tired out.”
Their eyes met and they remembered the night before: they had gotten in to the shower together and taken turns going down on each other under the hot spray. They had both collapsed back against the wall, their hands fisted in the other’s hair, their cries echoing in the steamy shower cabin. After they had recovered, they had fallen in to bed and started things up again. Dean had flipped her over and taken her from behind, his hands holding her firmly in place. Emma had been pinned between the bed and his body and she had loved every second of it.
Dean rolled her on to her back now, his hands between her legs. She moaned as his fingers parted her lower lips, stroked inside
“Second…” He hesitated. “I want to know why you didn’t have sex for almost five years.”
She went very still. “I think that violates rule number one – not telling each other anything too personal.”
Dean looked at her face; it was cold and distant. She looked like she was shutting down on him, and he reached out and took her hand. She tensed.
“Emma,” he said softly. “I’m asking for a very good reason, OK?”
“What is it?”
“I’m worried that something happened to you – that you had a bad experience five years ago. If somebody hurt you or forced you sexually, I do need to know that. You can see that, right?” He touched her cheek. “If you were attacked, and I’m the first guy you’ve been with since it happened, there may be times when you’d feel scared or freaked out. And I’d need to understand what’s going on.”
She stared at him. It had never occurred to her that he’d see her abstinence that way.
“You don’t have to go in to details,” he said. “Just tell me if somebody hurt you.”
She shook her head. “Dean, I was never raped or abused. What happened five years ago wasn’t about that. It was – it was awful. But it had nothing at all to do with sex.”
His eyes held hers. “Yeah? You’re telling me the truth?”
“Yes. I promise you. I wasn’t hurt in that way.”
“You weren’t beaten or… I don’t know… injured? Nothing that I may trigger by accident while we’re in bed together?”
“No.”
He was quiet for a few seconds. “But you won’t tell me what happened?”
“No,” Emma said. “I’ve told you what it wasn’t, and that’s all I’m going to say. Can you live with that?”
Dean looked at her. “Yeah. I can.”
“One more condition,” she said. “Last one.”
“OK.”
“Either one of us can end it at any time. No reasons given, no explanations offered, no guilt or hysterics from the other person. But it does have to be clearly stated. No disappearing forever without a word. We at least owe each other a face-to-face conversation about it being over for good. Deal?”
“Deal,” Dean said. “So. Do we shake on it?”
She shook her head and stood up. “No. We seal this deal another way. Back at your place.”
He stood up too and threw some money on the table. “Sounds good.” He was hard already. “Sounds very good.”
**
Emma felt hands on her back, gently stroking her awake. She made a small sound in her throat, snuggled deeper in to the warmth surrounding her. She raised her hand to adjust her pillow and touched a hard surface. It was breathing. Her eyes popped open and she gasped when she realized that she was lying on a broad chest with blond hair softly tickling her cheek. She lifted her head and looked in to bright green eyes.
“Hey, there,” Dean said in a sexy morning voice, all rough and deep. “How you doing today?”
“Good.”
“Oh, yeah?” His hands were moving lower now, across her hips, over her ass, down the backs of her thighs. “You sleep OK?”
She nodded. “You?”
“Yeah, pretty good.” His hands slid inside her thighs, pressed them apart. “I was damn tired out.”
Their eyes met and they remembered the night before: they had gotten in to the shower together and taken turns going down on each other under the hot spray. They had both collapsed back against the wall, their hands fisted in the other’s hair, their cries echoing in the steamy shower cabin. After they had recovered, they had fallen in to bed and started things up again. Dean had flipped her over and taken her from behind, his hands holding her firmly in place. Emma had been pinned between the bed and his body and she had loved every second of it.
Dean rolled her on to her back now, his hands between her legs. She moaned as his fingers parted her lower lips, stroked inside
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