again.
But she didn’t know. She didn’t
have a clue.
See the beginning of that day, at
the carnival, I’d hung around her and Finn and tried seeming sad that Jade
Silver and I had recently broken-up. Like I had liked Jade a lot or something. I don’t know exactly why I did that. Just to bug Zoey, I
guess. Make her think I was into someone that wasn’t her. But it was pathetic
and sad, of course. Because I didn’t like anyone but her.
I spent a lot of time that day
wincing at the carnival. I couldn’t help it. I’d wince whenever Zoey and Finn
would get cuddly—which was constantly. Wince when Zoey would laugh at
Finn’s lame jokes, or smile at him, or look at him. Yeah, I spent basically the
whole morning wincing. Real fun.
Then I saw it—the sign at the
Basket Ball Toss: Five dollars—one kiss . My eyes popped open wide. It was
just a joke, I figured. It was hand-written at the bottom of our school’s
fundraiser booth sign, under the real message:
One dollar—two throws
Two dollars—five throws
I didn’t mention the sign to Zoey.
Instead, I ran a hand over my face, trying my best not to crack a grin. “Hey,
Jones, weren’t you going to work one of the booths for a while?”
She made a face. “Yes. Why? You
want to get rid of me?”
For a second, it seemed like she
was going to get mad. For real. But she
didn’t—not really. She just gave me a fake grimace. “Fine. Whatever. Have
Finn to yourself for a while. I get it—guy time.” She gave Finn a playful
kiss on the tip of his nose. It was so cute.
I didn’t mean to watch. But I did,
anyway. I couldn’t tear my eyes away, though it made the pit of my stomach
crush with an ache and longing that I didn’t quite understand—though
sadly, in a way I did. Enough that I felt doomed.
Zoey caught me looking at them and
laughed, totally misunderstanding my expression. “Wow. We really do make you sick,
huh?”
For some reason
she thought I hated her. Maybe it was because I said things like I
answered that day, “Well, you guys are pretty disgusting.”
She laughed and kissed Finn
again—just to taunt me. And it worked. I was taunted, big time. Just not
the way she thought. She thought she was grossing me out. Only, it was the
total opposite. Total. Opposite.
I watched her glittery pink lips
press against Finn’s and I felt all the blood drain out of my face.
“Wow!” Zoey said when she playfully
glanced my way. I was probably all pale—I felt pale.
My throat was all
tight and tremors wracked through my body.
Zoey’s lips formed an “O.”
The muscles in my jaw tensed. “Are
you going to go or what?”
Whoa,
ease up Riley. It’s not her fault you’re a goon with a crush on her. Still,
all I said was, “Your booth is waiting.”
It wasn’t really that I wanted to
kiss my best friend’s girl. (Okay, I did want to—bad … but I wasn’t really planning on it.)
I tried telling myself I just
wanted to see Zoey squirm when guys lined up to get a kiss. Like it was just
supposed to be funny. Only the thought made me sort of sick. So, the joke was
more like it was on me.
See, I was really screwed up. Big
time. And I did stupid stuff like that all the time. I had no idea why. I was
just seriously messed in the head from having a crush on my best friend’s
girlfriend.
That crush—it tortured me.
Haunted me. Made me do crazy, stupid, heart-killing things.
No doubt—I was crushed by the
crush.
***
While Zoey worked at the Basket
Ball Toss, Finn and I rode the tilt-a-whirl a bunch of times. Then he got
nauseous. While he went to the bathroom to throw up—or whatever he
planned to do in there—I watched Zoey from afar as she worked at the
booth. It was by the bathroom, so it wasn’t exactly stalking. Well, okay it was
totally stalking.
Watching her, I held my breath. It
was like the other day when I sat listening to her read her poem in class with
my heart aching—no, actually breaking. She loved my best friend.
But she didn’t know. She didn’t
have a clue.
See the beginning of that day, at
the carnival, I’d hung around her and Finn and tried seeming sad that Jade
Silver and I had recently broken-up. Like I had liked Jade a lot or something. I don’t know exactly why I did that. Just to bug Zoey, I
guess. Make her think I was into someone that wasn’t her. But it was pathetic
and sad, of course. Because I didn’t like anyone but her.
I spent a lot of time that day
wincing at the carnival. I couldn’t help it. I’d wince whenever Zoey and Finn
would get cuddly—which was constantly. Wince when Zoey would laugh at
Finn’s lame jokes, or smile at him, or look at him. Yeah, I spent basically the
whole morning wincing. Real fun.
Then I saw it—the sign at the
Basket Ball Toss: Five dollars—one kiss . My eyes popped open wide. It was
just a joke, I figured. It was hand-written at the bottom of our school’s
fundraiser booth sign, under the real message:
One dollar—two throws
Two dollars—five throws
I didn’t mention the sign to Zoey.
Instead, I ran a hand over my face, trying my best not to crack a grin. “Hey,
Jones, weren’t you going to work one of the booths for a while?”
She made a face. “Yes. Why? You
want to get rid of me?”
For a second, it seemed like she
was going to get mad. For real. But she
didn’t—not really. She just gave me a fake grimace. “Fine. Whatever. Have
Finn to yourself for a while. I get it—guy time.” She gave Finn a playful
kiss on the tip of his nose. It was so cute.
I didn’t mean to watch. But I did,
anyway. I couldn’t tear my eyes away, though it made the pit of my stomach
crush with an ache and longing that I didn’t quite understand—though
sadly, in a way I did. Enough that I felt doomed.
Zoey caught me looking at them and
laughed, totally misunderstanding my expression. “Wow. We really do make you sick,
huh?”
For some reason
she thought I hated her. Maybe it was because I said things like I
answered that day, “Well, you guys are pretty disgusting.”
She laughed and kissed Finn
again—just to taunt me. And it worked. I was taunted, big time. Just not
the way she thought. She thought she was grossing me out. Only, it was the
total opposite. Total. Opposite.
I watched her glittery pink lips
press against Finn’s and I felt all the blood drain out of my face.
“Wow!” Zoey said when she playfully
glanced my way. I was probably all pale—I felt pale.
My throat was all
tight and tremors wracked through my body.
Zoey’s lips formed an “O.”
The muscles in my jaw tensed. “Are
you going to go or what?”
Whoa,
ease up Riley. It’s not her fault you’re a goon with a crush on her. Still,
all I said was, “Your booth is waiting.”
It wasn’t really that I wanted to
kiss my best friend’s girl. (Okay, I did want to—bad … but I wasn’t really planning on it.)
I tried telling myself I just
wanted to see Zoey squirm when guys lined up to get a kiss. Like it was just
supposed to be funny. Only the thought made me sort of sick. So, the joke was
more like it was on me.
See, I was really screwed up. Big
time. And I did stupid stuff like that all the time. I had no idea why. I was
just seriously messed in the head from having a crush on my best friend’s
girlfriend.
That crush—it tortured me.
Haunted me. Made me do crazy, stupid, heart-killing things.
No doubt—I was crushed by the
crush.
***
While Zoey worked at the Basket
Ball Toss, Finn and I rode the tilt-a-whirl a bunch of times. Then he got
nauseous. While he went to the bathroom to throw up—or whatever he
planned to do in there—I watched Zoey from afar as she worked at the
booth. It was by the bathroom, so it wasn’t exactly stalking. Well, okay it was
totally stalking.
Watching her, I held my breath. It
was like the other day when I sat listening to her read her poem in class with
my heart aching—no, actually breaking. She loved my best friend.
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