dinghy, with only a compass bearing to guide us back to Explorer , feels to me the flimsiest part of our plan. Dev has more faith than I in both the compass and Lara.
“And make sure you hide the boat well. If anyone finds it, you’ll be trapped.”
I sigh. His faith seems not to extend to me. “We will be careful, Dev.”
“I know, I know.” His smile holds both apology and apprehension.
“We’ll be on the island for less than a day, and we probably won’t need to go any farther than Leewood,” I assure him. “Even if we do, it’ll only be to Merryn’s. And while we’re there, the dinghy will be safe in the cave at Skellap Bay.” My heart sings as I say it, even as my belly lurches.
My emotions have been pulled back and forth so many times they don’t know where to settle. Knowing that I’ll soon see my brother and cousin sends delight fizzing through me, but within my anticipation lurks a corner of doubt. I can’t guess how things might have changed in my absence, or how Ty and Sophie will react. I try not to let myself expect too much.
“You should get some rest,” Lara says, coming up beside Dev. She’s been happier since we set sail, and it occurs to me that she likes the tainted air and crowds of Vidya no better than I. “I’ll take us as close as I can so you’ve less distance to row, but it’ll be a slow tack with the wind against us. You’ve hours to wait yet.”
My eyes roam the sea horizon. The skerries are fading from view in the withering light, the smudge of island already lost. My belly dips and sways like the ocean below us. Above, wind snaps in the sail. “I doubt I’ll be able to sleep.”
“Try at least. It’ll be a long day tomorrow by the time we pick you up, and who knows whether you’ll get the opportunity after you land.” Lara links her arm through Dev’s. As our eyes meet she smiles.
Last night she made me promise that I’d keep myself safe. “Devdan wouldn’t forgive himself if anything happened to you, Ness. You should have seen him last summer when news of the Paras’ attack on Ebony Hill arrived in Vidya. He blamed himself that you were there.” For all that she’d been aiming for off-hand, I’d caught the intensity underlying her words. Her smile had been lopsided. “It matters to me, that he’s happy,” she’d added.
Dev’s happiness matters to me as well, though I’ve understood for a year that my feelings are different from Lara’s. With a last glance towards the horizon I bid them goodnight.
Even though I’ve grown accustomed to the shift and sway of the ship, I can’t settle. An image of my Pa creeps into my head: Pa with his strong arms and fanciful stories, his smile broad in his weathered face. But I recall also the sadness that engulfed him, that would send him up Cullin Hill to stare out across the ocean. I’ve sometimes wondered why he stayed on Dunnett after Mama died. But then, where would he have gone? We’d heard what had happened on his home island of Tay. He was lucky he’d been at sea when the sickness swept through his people.
Or perhaps it wasn’t lucky to be alive when nearly everyone you knew and cared for was dead. An image of Ronan, alone on an empty sea, jostles for a place beside Pa, bringing a premonition of disaster leaping up within me. Spreading my fingers wide, I press my palm against the wall above my bunk, so that I can feel the sea’s pulse like a heartbeat. “Be with us, Pa,” I whisper. Who knows whether he hears me.
It’s a relief when Lara’s hand shakes me out of my tattered dreams. In the galley, Kush slides a heaped plate towards me. The bread tastes doughy and damp on my tongue, the beans soggy with egg. I push the food away half-eaten.
“You’ll need the energy,” Kush says. He’s fine-boned and tall, his skin dark like Dev’s, his nose too long for his face. His eyes are watchful as a gull’s, but softer.
“I’m not hungry.”
Ronan reaches for the plate. It was
“And make sure you hide the boat well. If anyone finds it, you’ll be trapped.”
I sigh. His faith seems not to extend to me. “We will be careful, Dev.”
“I know, I know.” His smile holds both apology and apprehension.
“We’ll be on the island for less than a day, and we probably won’t need to go any farther than Leewood,” I assure him. “Even if we do, it’ll only be to Merryn’s. And while we’re there, the dinghy will be safe in the cave at Skellap Bay.” My heart sings as I say it, even as my belly lurches.
My emotions have been pulled back and forth so many times they don’t know where to settle. Knowing that I’ll soon see my brother and cousin sends delight fizzing through me, but within my anticipation lurks a corner of doubt. I can’t guess how things might have changed in my absence, or how Ty and Sophie will react. I try not to let myself expect too much.
“You should get some rest,” Lara says, coming up beside Dev. She’s been happier since we set sail, and it occurs to me that she likes the tainted air and crowds of Vidya no better than I. “I’ll take us as close as I can so you’ve less distance to row, but it’ll be a slow tack with the wind against us. You’ve hours to wait yet.”
My eyes roam the sea horizon. The skerries are fading from view in the withering light, the smudge of island already lost. My belly dips and sways like the ocean below us. Above, wind snaps in the sail. “I doubt I’ll be able to sleep.”
“Try at least. It’ll be a long day tomorrow by the time we pick you up, and who knows whether you’ll get the opportunity after you land.” Lara links her arm through Dev’s. As our eyes meet she smiles.
Last night she made me promise that I’d keep myself safe. “Devdan wouldn’t forgive himself if anything happened to you, Ness. You should have seen him last summer when news of the Paras’ attack on Ebony Hill arrived in Vidya. He blamed himself that you were there.” For all that she’d been aiming for off-hand, I’d caught the intensity underlying her words. Her smile had been lopsided. “It matters to me, that he’s happy,” she’d added.
Dev’s happiness matters to me as well, though I’ve understood for a year that my feelings are different from Lara’s. With a last glance towards the horizon I bid them goodnight.
Even though I’ve grown accustomed to the shift and sway of the ship, I can’t settle. An image of my Pa creeps into my head: Pa with his strong arms and fanciful stories, his smile broad in his weathered face. But I recall also the sadness that engulfed him, that would send him up Cullin Hill to stare out across the ocean. I’ve sometimes wondered why he stayed on Dunnett after Mama died. But then, where would he have gone? We’d heard what had happened on his home island of Tay. He was lucky he’d been at sea when the sickness swept through his people.
Or perhaps it wasn’t lucky to be alive when nearly everyone you knew and cared for was dead. An image of Ronan, alone on an empty sea, jostles for a place beside Pa, bringing a premonition of disaster leaping up within me. Spreading my fingers wide, I press my palm against the wall above my bunk, so that I can feel the sea’s pulse like a heartbeat. “Be with us, Pa,” I whisper. Who knows whether he hears me.
It’s a relief when Lara’s hand shakes me out of my tattered dreams. In the galley, Kush slides a heaped plate towards me. The bread tastes doughy and damp on my tongue, the beans soggy with egg. I push the food away half-eaten.
“You’ll need the energy,” Kush says. He’s fine-boned and tall, his skin dark like Dev’s, his nose too long for his face. His eyes are watchful as a gull’s, but softer.
“I’m not hungry.”
Ronan reaches for the plate. It was
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