Fudge-A-Mania by Judy Blume

point!" Sheila turned and ran from the room.
    I sure hoped things would improve before tonight, when Jimmy Fargo gets here!
    After breakfast, Mom helped get my room ready for Jimmy. She moved Fudge's things down the hall, into the room Grandma is sharing with Tootsie. She set up a rollaway bed for Fudge right next to Tootsie's crib. "I hate crowding you in like this," Mom said to Grandma.
    "I don't mind," Grandma said. "Sleeping in the same room as my grandchildren is a privilege. It's a lot more fun than sleeping in a room by myself."
    "You should get married, Grandma," Fudge said. "Then you wouldn't have to sleep in a room by yourself." He jumped on the rollaway bed.
    "That bed isn't designed for jumping," Mom told him. "It's going to collapse if you don't stop."
    Fudge tumbled off the bed like some Olympic gymnast and landed on his feet. If I tried that I'd probably break a leg. "Do you still snore, Grandma?" he asked.
    "Fudgie!" Mom said. "That's not a polite question."
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    But Grandma didn't mind. She said, "I really don't know, Fudge. You'll have to tell me."
    "Snoring keeps the monsters away," he said.
    "Yes," Grandma said, "I'm sure it does."
    "When I get married I won't have monsters in my room," Fudge said.
    "Says who?" I asked.
    "You don't get monsters when you sleep in a bed with somebody else." "That's why you want to get married?" I said. "So you won't get monsters in your room?"
    "Why else would I get married?"
    "You should talk to Mitzi," I told him. "She's got monster spray."
    "Monster spray?"
    "Mitzi's Monster Spray," I said in a deep voice, trying out my commercial. "Made from a grandmother's secret formula. Spray twice a day and melt your monsters away"
    "Really, Peter..." Mom said.
    But Fudge liked the idea. He jumped back onto the rollaway bed and bounced up and down singing, "Monster spray melts your monsters away!"
    "Fudgie..." Mom warned. But it was too late. Both ends of the rollaway bed sprang up, catching Fudge in the middle.
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    I imagined the headline in tonight's paper:
    FIVE-YEAR-OLD FLATTENED BY ROLLAWAY BED
    "Get me out of here!" Fudge yelled.
    "Okay... okay..." Mom and Grandma held the bed apart and I pulled him out.
    "Stupid... stupid... bed!" Fudge cried, kicking it. "If you do that to me again I'm going to chop you up in little pieces!"
    "Let's not blame the bed," Mom said.
    Later, when we were out in the backyard, Fudge told Buzzy Senior what had happened.
    "Those beds can be very tricky," Buzzy Senior said.
    Fudge nodded. Then, out of nowhere, he said, "Do you snore, Buzzy?"
    "I used to snore," Buzzy Senior said, as if Fudge's question were perfectly natural. "But since I sleep alone now I really don't know."
    "How come you sleep alone?"
    "Because my wife died."
    Fudge got this serious look on his face. You could tell he was thinking hard. But after a minute his face lit up and he said, "You should sleep with Grandma!"
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    "Fudge!" Mom said.
    "Well, they're best friends," Fudge told her. "Like Pete and Jimmy. And Jimmy's going to sleep in Pete's room... right?"
    Buzzy Senior and Grandma looked at each other and laughed.
    That afternoon the sky turned gray and it started to drizzle. The Tubmans decided to drive to Bar Harbor. That's the town where all the tourists go. It's got hundreds of little shops selling T-shirts with sayings about Maine, like Cool as a Moose in Bar Harbor or Maine , Fifty Miles from Nowhere.
    "Count me out," Libby said. "I've got to be at work by three."
    "Count me out, too," Sheila said. "The Hatchers depend on me to baby-sit Fudge."
    But Mom convinced Sheila she deserved an afternoon off. If you ask me everyone was feeling sorry for the Cootie Queen just because Mouse got sick and couldn't come to Maine. Everyone but me, that is.
    Still, I felt relieved when the Tubmans left. I hope they go out for a pizza and catch a late movie, I thought. I hope they like the action in Bar Harbor so much they decide to stay for a week!
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    They still weren't back when Mr.