and I looked for someplace to sit down but everything wascars and barkdust and asphalt. And my neck started to tingle and stars came in my head and I had to kneel down really fast so I wouldnât fall. Then I went to a different place, a place totally away from Hillside and Darcy and everyone. It was peaceful there and nice but then I came back and I was in the gym and all these people were running around and waving air at me and sticking stuff in my face. And Mrs. Schroeder was giving me water and telling everyone to stand back. And Darcyâs dad was there and he was slapping my hand and Mrs. Schroeder told him not to worry, that every year someone fainted at graduation, it was just such an exciting moment for young people.
9
Once school was out the big question became, what would I do over the summer? My parents thought I should go back to Camp North Pacific. It was up in the San Juan Islands above Seattle and my mom knew someone who knew someone and they had sent me there for two summers in junior high. But I was sixteen now and I was too old to go there as a camper, even if I wanted to, which I definitely did not. So then they suggested I be a counselor but I was way too late to apply. So then they said I could go on the grounds crew or something and they were serious. In fact they were adamant. I was like,
the grounds crew
? Their argumentwas what else was I going to do? And they were obviously worried about me hanging out downtown and wearing weird clothes and Cybil shaving her head, though they wouldnât admit it. And I was totally caught off-guard and didnât have any arguments against them. And my mom still knew the someone who knew someone. So they won. I got signed on to the maintenance crew. I was going to wash dishes and cook and do laundry for ten weeks for almost no money. I felt like I was being sent into exile.
The first week was the worst. The people on the maintenance crew were the lowest people in the whole camp. They were from Harperâs Ferry, the little town nearby, and they had accents like Canadians, like âay?â all the time. There was an older woman named Rita and a boy about my age named Brad who looked like Scott Haskell, blond and with freckles but sort of dopey and not really as cute. And the girl counselors were all girl-counselor types, rich and perky and cheerful. And the boy counselors were the same, big teeth and Izod shirts and just too perfect. And being on the maintenance crew they wouldnât even notice me anyway except some who remembered me from before and they just looked at me like
What happened to you
?
The work was super hard and at first I was so tired I could barely stay awake at night. Iâd eat dinner and crawl in my bunk and that was it. But after a while I would read some, just whatever books and magazines were lying around, and then Rita started giving me better books. One was about these artists in Paris who had sex all the time. I read that one a lot but it made me horny which made me lonely which made me depressed. But then after the first couple weeks I got used to everything and it wasnât so bad. Our building was separate from the rest of the camp and we could stay up as late as we wanted and we had a little porch and steps to hang out on.And one day I passed one of the counselors with a group of screaming camper brats and I was actually glad I was on maintenance.
By July I felt pretty settled. It was getting hotter at night and weâd sit outside and Rita would smoke and Brad would read comic books and 1 would write letters to Darcy and Cybil. Darcy was working at The Gap at Sunset Mall. She had a sort of boyfriend named Michael who worked in the mall except she thought he was gay because he would never touch her except sometimes he would let her give him back rubs. She said it was driving her crazy and she was so horny she thought she might explode. Cybil was practicing with Richard and Greg and trying to get a job. She
9
Once school was out the big question became, what would I do over the summer? My parents thought I should go back to Camp North Pacific. It was up in the San Juan Islands above Seattle and my mom knew someone who knew someone and they had sent me there for two summers in junior high. But I was sixteen now and I was too old to go there as a camper, even if I wanted to, which I definitely did not. So then they suggested I be a counselor but I was way too late to apply. So then they said I could go on the grounds crew or something and they were serious. In fact they were adamant. I was like,
the grounds crew
? Their argumentwas what else was I going to do? And they were obviously worried about me hanging out downtown and wearing weird clothes and Cybil shaving her head, though they wouldnât admit it. And I was totally caught off-guard and didnât have any arguments against them. And my mom still knew the someone who knew someone. So they won. I got signed on to the maintenance crew. I was going to wash dishes and cook and do laundry for ten weeks for almost no money. I felt like I was being sent into exile.
The first week was the worst. The people on the maintenance crew were the lowest people in the whole camp. They were from Harperâs Ferry, the little town nearby, and they had accents like Canadians, like âay?â all the time. There was an older woman named Rita and a boy about my age named Brad who looked like Scott Haskell, blond and with freckles but sort of dopey and not really as cute. And the girl counselors were all girl-counselor types, rich and perky and cheerful. And the boy counselors were the same, big teeth and Izod shirts and just too perfect. And being on the maintenance crew they wouldnât even notice me anyway except some who remembered me from before and they just looked at me like
What happened to you
?
The work was super hard and at first I was so tired I could barely stay awake at night. Iâd eat dinner and crawl in my bunk and that was it. But after a while I would read some, just whatever books and magazines were lying around, and then Rita started giving me better books. One was about these artists in Paris who had sex all the time. I read that one a lot but it made me horny which made me lonely which made me depressed. But then after the first couple weeks I got used to everything and it wasnât so bad. Our building was separate from the rest of the camp and we could stay up as late as we wanted and we had a little porch and steps to hang out on.And one day I passed one of the counselors with a group of screaming camper brats and I was actually glad I was on maintenance.
By July I felt pretty settled. It was getting hotter at night and weâd sit outside and Rita would smoke and Brad would read comic books and 1 would write letters to Darcy and Cybil. Darcy was working at The Gap at Sunset Mall. She had a sort of boyfriend named Michael who worked in the mall except she thought he was gay because he would never touch her except sometimes he would let her give him back rubs. She said it was driving her crazy and she was so horny she thought she might explode. Cybil was practicing with Richard and Greg and trying to get a job. She
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