Hawk's Way Grooms by Joan Johnston

flesh-and-blood woman around.
    And when it was some other woman besides Jewel. It wasn’t going to do him any good getting aroused by thoughts of her, because she was the last person he could have sex with.
    Hell, his leg was killing him. He had some exercises he was supposed to do at night that he hadn’t done to relax the muscles. He needed to lay his leg flat in bed. He needed…he needed to know he could function as a man. The situation with Eve had been disturbing because it had never happened to him before. What if something was wrong with him? What if all those operations had done something to his libido?
    You don’t have any problem responding to Jewel.
    He recalled his feelings for Jewel, the ones that had sent him off in search of another woman. They weren’t as comforting as they should have been. He had felt the same sort of semi-arousal with Eve before he kissed her, but when it came time for action, his body had opted out.
    Mac cut the pickup engine at the back door to the cottage. No lights. At least he’d be spared the ignominy of Jewel seeing him sneaking in at two in the morning. He didn’t want to have to make some explanation about why he was home early. He wasn’t about to tell her the truth, and he hated like hell to lie.
    He eased the kitchen door open—Western doors were rarely locked, even in this day and age—and slipped inside.
    â€œHi.”
    Mac nearly lost his balance and fell. “What the hell are you doing sitting here in the dark?”
    He reached for the light switch, but Jewel said, “Don’t.”
    The rough, raw sound of her voice, as though she had been crying, stayed his hand. He remained where he was, waiting for his eyes to adjust to the dark. He finally located her in the shadows. She was sitting with her elbows perched on the kitchen table, her face buried in her hands.
    He limped over, scraped a chair closer and sat beside her. He felt her stiffen as he laid an arm across her shoulder. “Are you all right?
    â€œI’m fine.”
    â€œYou don’t sound fine. You sound like you’ve been crying.”
    â€œI didn’t think you’d be back tonight.”
    Which meant she had expected to have the privacy to cry without being disturbed. It didn’t explain why she had been crying. She tried to rise, but he kept his arm around her and pressed her back down. “I’m here, Jewel.”
    â€œWhy is that, Mac? I can’t imagine any woman throwing you out. Which means you left on your own. What happened?”
    This was exactly the scene Mac had been hoping to avoid. “She…uh…we…uh…”
    â€œDon’t tell me Eve didn’t make a pass.”
    â€œShe did,” Mac conceded reluctantly.
    â€œThen why aren’t you spending the night with her?”
    â€œI…uh…that sort of thing can give a woman ideas.”
    â€œI see.”
    â€œYou do?”
    â€œSure. Spend the whole night in a woman’s bed, and she tends to think you might be serious about her. Everyone knows you’re a love’em and leave’em kind of guy.”
    â€œI am? I mean, I suppose I am. I haven’t found a woman I’d want to settle down with who’d have me.” That was certainly no lie.
    Eve had wanted him, all right. It should have been the easiest thing in the world to take her in his arms and make love to her. The situation had been perfect: willing woman, intelligent, not a total stranger, attractive—hell, absolutely beautiful. And it had been absolutely impossible.
    Mac bit back the sound of frustration that sought voice.
    â€œYou should go to bed if you’re going to get up early and walk tomorrow,” Jewel said.
    â€œI’d rather sit here with you,” Mac replied.
    â€œI’d rather be alone.”
    â€œAre you sure?”
    â€œI’ll be fine.”
    Mac leaned over to kiss her softly on the temple. Her hair smelled of