out in order to remove a wad of gum. I must hasten to add, lest one waste too much time feeling sorry for Caroline Sha, that she has the most beautiful face I have ever seen.
Alice shook her head, no doubt commiserating to herself that HELL HATH NO CURRY
47
I was wasting her time by just stating the obvious. “Of course she has no hair, but that doesn’t stop her from being drop-dead gorgeous.”
“I wouldn’t say she’s all that pretty.”
“Any other woman, given her condition, would wear a scarf, or a wig, but Caroline knows that this would detract from that flawless face of hers.”
“Flawless is stretching it a bit, don’t you think?”
“Come on, Magdalena, admit it. You’re a beautiful woman, but Caroline is downright stunning.”
I sighed. “Okay already, she’s a looker. So Cornelius was seeing Caroline as well. First, how do you know that?”
“Ha! I caught them—well, how shall I say this so as not to offend your tender ears—I caught them engaged in the act.”
“For your information, my ears are not so tender.”
“Magdalena, you’re a prude. Don’t deny it.”
“Just because I’m not a tramp, like some people I know.”
“You’re a rude prude.”
Sometime it pays to swallow one’s pride, no matter how bitter the taste. “Whatever you say, dear. Can you think of any reason that Caroline might want her lover dead?”
“They weren’t lovers, for goodness’ sakes! Their relationship was purely physical.”
“How do you know?”
“Because Cornelius told me so.”
“He did? When?”
“The night he broke off our engagement. I think he was trying to let me down as easy as possible—at least from his point of view. He said I shouldn’t feel bad because I wasn’t the only one he’d been stringing along. There were plenty of others that would be getting the same news and feeling the same way. He wanted me to comfort myself with the knowledge that he’d actually loved me. The others, like Caroline Sha—that’s when he mentioned her name—were just notches in his belt.”
48 Tamar
Myers
“That’s disgusting!”
“That’s Cornelius in a nutshell.”
I thanked Alice for her time, and gently pointed out that my visit might have been a tad more pleasant had she offered me some refreshments. Alice, who supposedly has a great sense of humor, was not amused.
Having skipped brunch at the Sausage Barn, and not getting even so much as a brownie from Alice, I was starving. Thank heavens there is always one place where they have to feed you, and that, of course, is home. I could smell yeast rolls baking the second I opened the kitchen door. Freni was standing at the table, her back to me, brushing shortening on a pan of rolls to make them glisten.
“Yoo-hoo,” I called pleasantly. “ ’Tis I, your comely, and clever, cousin.”
Freni paid no attention to me.
“Lost in thought, are we, dear?”
Still no response.
I walked over and tapped her on the shoulder. “Earth to Freni—”
That’s when my dear cousin left the earth. Freni jumped so high that, had she been a good three feet taller, she would have connected with my eight-foot ceiling.
“Ach, du lieber !” she gasped, after several gasps that were solely for oxygen intake.
“Relax. It’s only me, your very own Magdalena, as big as life and twice as ugly—no, make that beautiful.”
“For shame, Magdalena. I think maybe you use seven of my lives, yah?”
“That’s what you said the last two times I scared you. That puts you twelve lives in the hole.”
She appeared to be staring at my mouth. “And now the tricks,” she said.
HELL HATH NO CURRY
49
“Tricks?”
“It is a child’s game, Magdalena. You move the lips only, but I know you say nothing. I have been around the blocks; I am not such a spring pullet.”
“Blocks? Chickens? What on earth are you talking about?” A split second after saying that I noticed the huge balls of dough protruding from her ears like heads of
Alice shook her head, no doubt commiserating to herself that HELL HATH NO CURRY
47
I was wasting her time by just stating the obvious. “Of course she has no hair, but that doesn’t stop her from being drop-dead gorgeous.”
“I wouldn’t say she’s all that pretty.”
“Any other woman, given her condition, would wear a scarf, or a wig, but Caroline knows that this would detract from that flawless face of hers.”
“Flawless is stretching it a bit, don’t you think?”
“Come on, Magdalena, admit it. You’re a beautiful woman, but Caroline is downright stunning.”
I sighed. “Okay already, she’s a looker. So Cornelius was seeing Caroline as well. First, how do you know that?”
“Ha! I caught them—well, how shall I say this so as not to offend your tender ears—I caught them engaged in the act.”
“For your information, my ears are not so tender.”
“Magdalena, you’re a prude. Don’t deny it.”
“Just because I’m not a tramp, like some people I know.”
“You’re a rude prude.”
Sometime it pays to swallow one’s pride, no matter how bitter the taste. “Whatever you say, dear. Can you think of any reason that Caroline might want her lover dead?”
“They weren’t lovers, for goodness’ sakes! Their relationship was purely physical.”
“How do you know?”
“Because Cornelius told me so.”
“He did? When?”
“The night he broke off our engagement. I think he was trying to let me down as easy as possible—at least from his point of view. He said I shouldn’t feel bad because I wasn’t the only one he’d been stringing along. There were plenty of others that would be getting the same news and feeling the same way. He wanted me to comfort myself with the knowledge that he’d actually loved me. The others, like Caroline Sha—that’s when he mentioned her name—were just notches in his belt.”
48 Tamar
Myers
“That’s disgusting!”
“That’s Cornelius in a nutshell.”
I thanked Alice for her time, and gently pointed out that my visit might have been a tad more pleasant had she offered me some refreshments. Alice, who supposedly has a great sense of humor, was not amused.
Having skipped brunch at the Sausage Barn, and not getting even so much as a brownie from Alice, I was starving. Thank heavens there is always one place where they have to feed you, and that, of course, is home. I could smell yeast rolls baking the second I opened the kitchen door. Freni was standing at the table, her back to me, brushing shortening on a pan of rolls to make them glisten.
“Yoo-hoo,” I called pleasantly. “ ’Tis I, your comely, and clever, cousin.”
Freni paid no attention to me.
“Lost in thought, are we, dear?”
Still no response.
I walked over and tapped her on the shoulder. “Earth to Freni—”
That’s when my dear cousin left the earth. Freni jumped so high that, had she been a good three feet taller, she would have connected with my eight-foot ceiling.
“Ach, du lieber !” she gasped, after several gasps that were solely for oxygen intake.
“Relax. It’s only me, your very own Magdalena, as big as life and twice as ugly—no, make that beautiful.”
“For shame, Magdalena. I think maybe you use seven of my lives, yah?”
“That’s what you said the last two times I scared you. That puts you twelve lives in the hole.”
She appeared to be staring at my mouth. “And now the tricks,” she said.
HELL HATH NO CURRY
49
“Tricks?”
“It is a child’s game, Magdalena. You move the lips only, but I know you say nothing. I have been around the blocks; I am not such a spring pullet.”
“Blocks? Chickens? What on earth are you talking about?” A split second after saying that I noticed the huge balls of dough protruding from her ears like heads of
Similar Books
