if you come here and I’m not sober, you’ll never come back.” She paused, but he didn’t say anything. He certainly wouldn’t lie and deny it. “And if I don’t drink, I can see you and be a part of the life you have now.”
“I have one more question. Has he ever come back?”
“No.” She shook her head. “After a few years, the people from the state helped me go through the divorce process so I could get assistance. I haven’t heard from him since . . . that night.”
The night Sam fought back. The night he was finally big enough and strong enough to take the belt away from his old man. It was also the night his mother finally dropped the bottle and tried to intercede. She’d begged Sam not to hurt his father because he’d only make it worse.
The old man had taken off. He got picked up and spent the night in the drunk tank and left town as soon as they let him out. Sam might have taken off, too, but he knew if he took off, his mother would drink herself to death within days. It was the rage at himself for not hating her enough to do it anyway that made him drink for the first time.
Two years later, it was Coach looking him in the eye at the police station and telling him he believed in him that made him drink for the last time.
“I want to know about your life
now
,” he told his mom. “I want to know where you work and what kind of movies you watch and your favorite television shows.”
A genuine, happy smile lit up her face and Sam let himself bask in the warmth of it. Today they were both better and stronger. It wasenough.
05
J en heard her phone’s text message tone dinging and knew it was either Kelly or Gretchen. Her alarm clock went off at six in the morning and it was fifteen minutes after, which meant one of her friends had given her enough time to pee and stumble to the coffee brewer before texting.
Her friends had no way of knowing she’d tossed and turned half the damn night, trying not to think about Sam and sex and failing miserably, or that she’d already hit snooze once and had intended to hit it again.
But it was Friday and she liked her job, so she threw back the covers and sat up. After scrubbing her face with her hands and shoving her hair out of her eyes, she picked up her cell phone and unhooked it from the charging cable.
WTH? Spill.
It was a group text started by Kelly, and Jen guessed Gretchen had already seen it and was waiting for a reply. Even though the Walker farm hadn’t had cows to milk in years, they still did the “early to bed and ungodly early to rise” thing.
She typed a response. Had a biz meeting.
After tossing the phone on the bed, she went into the bathroom for a few minutes and wasn’t surprised to hear it dinging when she came back out. She grabbed it on her way to the kitchen and read their responses while waiting for her coffee to brew.
Biz meeting? Please. That was Kelly.
Gretchen started her message with a monkey emoji. Monkey business? Then there were more monkeys and a banana.
Jen rolled her eyes. Since Alex would be traveling at times, he’d bought his fiancée her first smartphone so texting would be easier for her and they could video chat. Jen wasn’t sure if Gretchen had mastered video chatting yet, but she was sure as hell enjoying the emojis.
No bananas involved. Then she sent the cheeseburger emoji.
I’m disappointed , Kelly texted.
Gretchen sent a sad face. Jen responded with the coffee cup and alarm clock emojis.
Then she set the phone down so she could add sugar and milk to her coffee. It was too early in the morning for group texts and pictograms. Her friends seemed to have taken the hint, so she watched the news while she drank the first cup. Then she showered and made another.
She’d just finished drying her hair when she heard the phone go off again. Assuming it was Gretchen or Kelly, shetook the extra couple of minutes to put on the tinted sunscreen she wore every day and a little lip gloss.
It wasn’t
“I have one more question. Has he ever come back?”
“No.” She shook her head. “After a few years, the people from the state helped me go through the divorce process so I could get assistance. I haven’t heard from him since . . . that night.”
The night Sam fought back. The night he was finally big enough and strong enough to take the belt away from his old man. It was also the night his mother finally dropped the bottle and tried to intercede. She’d begged Sam not to hurt his father because he’d only make it worse.
The old man had taken off. He got picked up and spent the night in the drunk tank and left town as soon as they let him out. Sam might have taken off, too, but he knew if he took off, his mother would drink herself to death within days. It was the rage at himself for not hating her enough to do it anyway that made him drink for the first time.
Two years later, it was Coach looking him in the eye at the police station and telling him he believed in him that made him drink for the last time.
“I want to know about your life
now
,” he told his mom. “I want to know where you work and what kind of movies you watch and your favorite television shows.”
A genuine, happy smile lit up her face and Sam let himself bask in the warmth of it. Today they were both better and stronger. It wasenough.
05
J en heard her phone’s text message tone dinging and knew it was either Kelly or Gretchen. Her alarm clock went off at six in the morning and it was fifteen minutes after, which meant one of her friends had given her enough time to pee and stumble to the coffee brewer before texting.
Her friends had no way of knowing she’d tossed and turned half the damn night, trying not to think about Sam and sex and failing miserably, or that she’d already hit snooze once and had intended to hit it again.
But it was Friday and she liked her job, so she threw back the covers and sat up. After scrubbing her face with her hands and shoving her hair out of her eyes, she picked up her cell phone and unhooked it from the charging cable.
WTH? Spill.
It was a group text started by Kelly, and Jen guessed Gretchen had already seen it and was waiting for a reply. Even though the Walker farm hadn’t had cows to milk in years, they still did the “early to bed and ungodly early to rise” thing.
She typed a response. Had a biz meeting.
After tossing the phone on the bed, she went into the bathroom for a few minutes and wasn’t surprised to hear it dinging when she came back out. She grabbed it on her way to the kitchen and read their responses while waiting for her coffee to brew.
Biz meeting? Please. That was Kelly.
Gretchen started her message with a monkey emoji. Monkey business? Then there were more monkeys and a banana.
Jen rolled her eyes. Since Alex would be traveling at times, he’d bought his fiancée her first smartphone so texting would be easier for her and they could video chat. Jen wasn’t sure if Gretchen had mastered video chatting yet, but she was sure as hell enjoying the emojis.
No bananas involved. Then she sent the cheeseburger emoji.
I’m disappointed , Kelly texted.
Gretchen sent a sad face. Jen responded with the coffee cup and alarm clock emojis.
Then she set the phone down so she could add sugar and milk to her coffee. It was too early in the morning for group texts and pictograms. Her friends seemed to have taken the hint, so she watched the news while she drank the first cup. Then she showered and made another.
She’d just finished drying her hair when she heard the phone go off again. Assuming it was Gretchen or Kelly, shetook the extra couple of minutes to put on the tinted sunscreen she wore every day and a little lip gloss.
It wasn’t
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