If I Could Be With You

If I Could Be With You by Mary Mamie Hardesty

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Authors: Mary Mamie Hardesty
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love to talk about what’s happening with someone who knows the whole story.”
    Melanie looked down and checked the small, classic gold watch that wrapped her wrist. “It’s almost six, but I don’t have to meet Eric until eight. I guess I could just stay in this dress. You think it’ll work for a romantic dinner in little Italy?” She tried to twirl in the short black outfit.
    “Watch it,” an older man in a suit and tie growled at her as he loosened his tie from the heat.
    She fell into Hannah giggling.
    “Let’s go. There’s a place about a block from here that Eric and I love.”
    She followed Melanie up and out through the maze of people making their way home from work and those heading out for a summer evening of fun. As they left the subway Hannah was surprised to feel such a dramatic difference in temperature. The sweltering above ground heat almost felt like air conditioning, for a second anyway. A few minutes later, they stepped into the actual cool air of a small, shotgun style bar with black and white tiles on the floor and a huge polished oak bar that ran the length of the room.
    “There’s a booth in the back that’s pretty private. I’m assuming you want to talk- talk, right?” She emphasized talk in a way that let Hannah know Melanie understood exactly what this was about.
    “Yes,” Hannah shook her head and followed.
    Melanie stopped off and ordered two draft Stellas. The man behind the bar, who obviously knew her, promised to bring them over and they scooted into the small booth with burgandy seats. Hannah put her laptop and purse to the side.
    “Thank you so much for coming with me.  I love being with Charlie, but other than my PD classes, he’s the only social life I’ve had.”
    “And I’m sure the definition of how you’ve been spending your time isn’t exactly social!” She laughed.
    Hannah felt the color rise in her cheeks. This woman was the same age a Charlie.  Why was she allowing her to make her feel like a teenager caught having sex? She was a grown woman, independent and single, there was no reason she couldn’t have as much sex as she liked - with whomever she liked.
    “I am so happy you came to town, Hannah. To be honest, I’d almost given up hope that Charles might find a way to get a real life. He’s been living for other people so long, I thought maybe he’d forgotten he had his own needs to consider.”
    “You’re talking about Nadia?” she asked.
    “Ah...Nadia. Yes, I am.”
    The bartender brought over their drinks and Hannah took a large sip from the tall glass filled with beer. 
    “I need to know everything. Charlie’s told me some of it, but I think there are things he doesn’t really get from his perspective.”
    “Like what?” Melanie raised a finger and called out to the bartender, “Mike, send over some fries when you get a chance.” She looked at Hannah, eyebrows raised, “You good with that?”
    “Yeah, fries are always good.” She smiled. She liked Melanie a lot. If she ended up in New York, they might really become friends. The thought took her by surprise: If she ended up in New York. Was she really considering changing her whole life for a man?
    “So, he told me about the marriage being one of friendship - not love or sex,” she started.
    “That’s absolutely true, at least from Charlie’s perspective,” Melanie said.
    “See! That’s what I mean.  He mentioned that Nadia has no idea I’m here because she gets insecure about the thought of him with other women, but I think it’s got to be more than just insecurity. How could she not be in love with him?”
    “Are you, Hannah? In love with him?”
    Hannah almost choked on her beer. How should she answer that? Did she even know?
    “It’s OK. You can hold off on your answer. Let’s talk more about Nadia, because I think you’re absolutely right in assuming they have very different ideas of what’s going on. You know that she became a citizen a few years ago? They

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