how? She was to blame and now she knew that only repairing the damage wasn’t going to be easy if she had such a chance.
She spent a few seconds staring at the name of the tune, the artist debating to delete that too, delete everything that reminded her of him. She found the tune. Only, her heart stung. She stared the artist, the name of the tune and hit play. The beat started and her heart stop beating… Deepest Blue by Deepest Blue.
Suddenly her mind became invaded with visions of that night. The very night of his eighteenth birthday party came flooding back. Memories struck her down the way he held her tight, the way their bodies connected feeling his breath on her face, the warmth that generated her energy, his kindness that blew her away. She felt like a girl having some serious fun with the opposite sex, although he to her at the time had been weird, interacting with men, boys. She lacked confidence, at times had been uncomfortable, but Calvin welcomed her making her feel extra special.
How that night he took her into his arms, swung her around she had never laughed and smiled so much. She found the alcohol made her giggly, certain the drink had relaxed her and delighted she’d attend the party, deciding to screw it she was going to have a good night including having her first sexual experience.
His smile, sublime. His touch, delicate. His appearance, astonishing. She would admit at the time she expected him to act like a typical rich boy, only no…his kindness was so considerate so embracing, enduring. A genuine guy, a man who cherished, stole her heart, and left her tender wishing for more. He was her deepest blue. If temptation had ever come back her way, and he’d come back to find her, visited her house she would have gone with him again, she would have captivated every living, breathing second of him.
She doesn’t regret having sex with him, if anything she had been enchanted, after hearing so many wonderful things about the Edwards, about their son from her parents, only ended in her misfortune leaving her expecting his baby and then saw no choice but to give him away.
Her stomach churned being reminded of the very day she had to walk away from her son, leaving him behind. She felt sick to the core. Her tummy tightened and jerked. Quickly she placed her hand over her mouth. She dashed out the room into the bathroom where she quickly lowered to her knees to hit the toilet basin. She vomited violently. She held her long hair back whilst she wrenched her guts up. The foul taste took over her mouth making her tummy ultra-sensitive. She kneeled over the toilet as more came up, with visions remembering how she looked back at the house to where her son was, after her time living with the family was over. She’d lied to the couple telling them she had her parents to go to. Maybe it had been wrong of her to expect her parents to allow her back into the family unit, anything at the time was worth a try, being in the desperate state she was. She had nothing…nothing at all. Only, her mum slammed the door on her face, leaving her homeless. Her heart had been cut up enough without adding further anguish.
She sobbed her heart out. Surges of tears flooded down her cheeks dripping off her chin onto her clothes. She felt vile, mouth filled with the foul taste of vomit. How her heart churned. The things she had tried so hard to stomach yet…deep in her guts, she had lost everything that had been important to her.
Suddenly, she could feel hands on her hair where she had it pulled back, tangling their fingers with her own. She paused wondering who the hell had come to see her. Why would anyone wish to see her? She had done nothing but failed everyone she’d come into contact with.
“It’s okay, Sophie, let it up.”
Sophie widened her eyes she knew that voice. Calvin.
Tears flooded her eyes. She did not believe he’d somehow come back. Why was he back?
Her stomach in agony. She leaned back over the toilet.
She spent a few seconds staring at the name of the tune, the artist debating to delete that too, delete everything that reminded her of him. She found the tune. Only, her heart stung. She stared the artist, the name of the tune and hit play. The beat started and her heart stop beating… Deepest Blue by Deepest Blue.
Suddenly her mind became invaded with visions of that night. The very night of his eighteenth birthday party came flooding back. Memories struck her down the way he held her tight, the way their bodies connected feeling his breath on her face, the warmth that generated her energy, his kindness that blew her away. She felt like a girl having some serious fun with the opposite sex, although he to her at the time had been weird, interacting with men, boys. She lacked confidence, at times had been uncomfortable, but Calvin welcomed her making her feel extra special.
How that night he took her into his arms, swung her around she had never laughed and smiled so much. She found the alcohol made her giggly, certain the drink had relaxed her and delighted she’d attend the party, deciding to screw it she was going to have a good night including having her first sexual experience.
His smile, sublime. His touch, delicate. His appearance, astonishing. She would admit at the time she expected him to act like a typical rich boy, only no…his kindness was so considerate so embracing, enduring. A genuine guy, a man who cherished, stole her heart, and left her tender wishing for more. He was her deepest blue. If temptation had ever come back her way, and he’d come back to find her, visited her house she would have gone with him again, she would have captivated every living, breathing second of him.
She doesn’t regret having sex with him, if anything she had been enchanted, after hearing so many wonderful things about the Edwards, about their son from her parents, only ended in her misfortune leaving her expecting his baby and then saw no choice but to give him away.
Her stomach churned being reminded of the very day she had to walk away from her son, leaving him behind. She felt sick to the core. Her tummy tightened and jerked. Quickly she placed her hand over her mouth. She dashed out the room into the bathroom where she quickly lowered to her knees to hit the toilet basin. She vomited violently. She held her long hair back whilst she wrenched her guts up. The foul taste took over her mouth making her tummy ultra-sensitive. She kneeled over the toilet as more came up, with visions remembering how she looked back at the house to where her son was, after her time living with the family was over. She’d lied to the couple telling them she had her parents to go to. Maybe it had been wrong of her to expect her parents to allow her back into the family unit, anything at the time was worth a try, being in the desperate state she was. She had nothing…nothing at all. Only, her mum slammed the door on her face, leaving her homeless. Her heart had been cut up enough without adding further anguish.
She sobbed her heart out. Surges of tears flooded down her cheeks dripping off her chin onto her clothes. She felt vile, mouth filled with the foul taste of vomit. How her heart churned. The things she had tried so hard to stomach yet…deep in her guts, she had lost everything that had been important to her.
Suddenly, she could feel hands on her hair where she had it pulled back, tangling their fingers with her own. She paused wondering who the hell had come to see her. Why would anyone wish to see her? She had done nothing but failed everyone she’d come into contact with.
“It’s okay, Sophie, let it up.”
Sophie widened her eyes she knew that voice. Calvin.
Tears flooded her eyes. She did not believe he’d somehow come back. Why was he back?
Her stomach in agony. She leaned back over the toilet.
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