It's Always Darkest Before the Fridge Door Opens: Enjoying the Fruits of Middle Age by Phil Callaway, Martha O. Bolton

nerves we’re using up with each encounter, how can we possibly keep a good tab on how many we have left? That’s what the world needs. A nerve chart, like one of those gas gauges on a car that will show you exactly how many more miles you can go before you run out of gas. Think of the frustration we could save ourselves if a chart like this was in existence. Well, we’re tired of waiting for someone to come out with such a chart, so we have developed our own. . . .
    Nerve Depletion Chart
Action
Nerves Used
Telemarketer calling during dinner
4
Girl tallying your groceries, chewing a wad of gum, and talking on her cell phone
6
Inattentive waiter
3
Phone conversation with a whiner
5
Phone conversation with a braggart
8
Door-to-door salesman who won’t take no for an answer
7
Appliance calls it quits
5
Stuck between two noisy parties on camping trip
9
Noisy parties are playing rap “music”
17
Children poking each other in backseat of car
9
Son throws daughter’s iPod out car window
12
Daughter throws son out car window
30
Major car trouble (your car is at exit 136, the engine is at exit 135)
35
Man cuts in front of you on the freeway
12
Tie cut off in paper cutter
36
    The above list isn’t by any means complete, but we hope it gives you an idea of how quickly our nerves can get depleted throughout the day. It’s no wonder most of us are already on our last one by noon. Thankfully, there are other events we encounter that scientists believe can actually replace those beaten-down nerves.
    Nerve Replenishment Chart
Action
Nerves Replenished
Check in the mail
12
Someone saying thank-you
18
Encouraging word
22
Call from good friend
30
Unexpected raise or promotion
37
Someone really listening to you
24
A hearty laugh at a good clean joke
25
A repaired relationship
45
Hug from a loved one
50
Son buys daughter new iPod
78
Daughter visits son in hospital to apologize for car window incident
341
    The apostle Paul reminds us in Philippians 4:4–6 to ‘‘Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.’’ Did you notice that Paul said that we are to rejoice always ? Is he kidding? Rejoice in the middle of what I’m going through? No way!
    Yes way. How could he say that? Because he’s been in those difficult places, too. In fact, Paul was writing these words from prison, where he had every reason to be on his last nerve. Yet he chose to focus on three irrefutable truths for the weary and worn down. Three truths that can bring joy, peace, even laughter to our lives, in the midst of our circumstances.
    1. Rest in peace. Your Father is awake. Why should you be, too? He has promised that we will never have to walk through our disappointments, hurts, and frustrations alone. He will be there. So we can close our eyes at night and get the rest we need.
    2. Worry is a waste of good time. You know what they say, worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it will never take you anywhere. And what’s the cure for worry— prayer. God hears us when we bring our anxieties to him. So quit biting those fingernails. God didn’t intend for fingernails to be food.
    3. Be thankful. Joy grows best in the soil of thanksgiving. Even when you’re down to your last nerve, even when life is unfair, even when no one understands where you’re coming from, even when you’re being lied about, God has a way of sending nerve replenishers into our lives. People who counter every attack, every discouraging word, every hurt, and every disappointment. We won’t always recognize them (nerve replenishment often comes from people we don’t even know or expect anything from), but these stealth encouragers are secretly and steadily rebuilding our stock of nerves so that we’ll be able to face another day. God sends these nerve replenishers into