there until hell froze over before he'd make her cry.
Like a net made up of the threads of her hurt and anger and his contempt, the moment stretched between them trapping Sarah. Jake reached to touch her. She slapped his hand away and pushed past him, jerking open the door. Breathing as hard as though she'd run a mile, she held the knob in her shaking hand. "Leave Nicholas. I'll watch him."
Jake nodded once, as though satisfied about something. Sarah kept the edge of the door and the edge of her anger between them as he walked out of the kitchen, his booted heels smacking on the wood of the living room.
Following him, she grabbed the car keys off the rack by the kitchen door and hurled them at him. He reached in back of him in midstride and caught the key ring as it jangled towards him. "I'll tell Nicholas he's staying, then." The screen door shut quietly behind him.
Sarah wrapped her arms around her middle and absorbed the shaking that slashed through her with Jake's departure. She didn't owe Jake anything. He was asking too much of her without even knowing it. Nicholas and his need sliced at her, but she'd function. Survival had been made up of worse moments than this. Emptying her mind, she sought control. Don 7 think. Don't think.
She'd give the boy what she could for the time being.
"Hey, sport!" Jake let the door close softly behind him as he yelled for Nicholas. Sarah puzzled him. Every time he thought he had a handle on her, she surprised him. He'd have bet the shine of tears over sea-blue eyes was real.
He knew he'd been vicious. Every time she retreated, he felt driven to slash at her. She hadn't cried, though.
The urge to comfort her startled him. He rubbed his chin hard, chasing away the imagined feel of her soft, wet skin against his palm. He wasn't interested in her pain, real or false. She'd get no sympathy from him.
4 'So, Jake, are we gonna get some worms and pop and go fishing?"
"Not right now, kid." Jake caught the flying body in his arms. "Hey. Careful, Nicholas. Warn a person before you jump on them."
"It's all right, Jake. I knew you'd catch me." Nicholas bumped Jake's chin companionably.
"Yeah, but warn me next time."
"Sure, Jake. Let's go fishing, now, okay?"
"Not right now, sport. We'll see about later."
"But, Jake—" Nicholas squirmed.
Jake explained the situation to him. For a long moment the boy clung to him, his small fist clutching Jake's collar. Powerless, Jake patted Nicholas's back. Jake wanted to leave, to take Nicholas with him and not come back. He wanted to let Sarah Jane Simpson keep her home filled with secrets and shadows. Jake swung Nicholas up on his shoulders and took long strides towards the orange VW under the porte cochere.
Absentmindedly Nicholas chewed on his fingernail.
"Stop that, sport." Looking at the painfully chewed nails, Jake winced.
"Oh yeah. I keep forgetting. It's just a bad habit I got. You got any bad habits?"
"Kid, you ask the craziest questions." Jake shook his head in frustration, thinking of several not-to-be mentioned habits. "I reckon I do. Maybe. I don't know!"
"Don't worry about it, Jake. You don't bite off your nails, anyway. I been watching."
"Good, now let's change the subject," Jake grunted.
"'Kay. I like it here, Jake. I've never been this near so much water. You gonna take me swimming while we're here? You said we'd stay while you took care of business." Nicholas thumped cheerfully on Jake's head.
How could he desert the boy now, with the whole mess still unsettled and himself the most unsettled of all? Jake's
brain told him to run like hell, but deep inside a barely heard plea cried out when he looked into the woman's pain-filled eyes.
Jake perched Nicholas on the steps from the porte coch-ere to the front porch and looked at the face that had grown so important to him. He was trapped.
"You'll be back, right, Jake?" Nicholas hid the worry.
Just as his mother, Sarah, had hid her tears.
"I said I'd never go off and leave
Like a net made up of the threads of her hurt and anger and his contempt, the moment stretched between them trapping Sarah. Jake reached to touch her. She slapped his hand away and pushed past him, jerking open the door. Breathing as hard as though she'd run a mile, she held the knob in her shaking hand. "Leave Nicholas. I'll watch him."
Jake nodded once, as though satisfied about something. Sarah kept the edge of the door and the edge of her anger between them as he walked out of the kitchen, his booted heels smacking on the wood of the living room.
Following him, she grabbed the car keys off the rack by the kitchen door and hurled them at him. He reached in back of him in midstride and caught the key ring as it jangled towards him. "I'll tell Nicholas he's staying, then." The screen door shut quietly behind him.
Sarah wrapped her arms around her middle and absorbed the shaking that slashed through her with Jake's departure. She didn't owe Jake anything. He was asking too much of her without even knowing it. Nicholas and his need sliced at her, but she'd function. Survival had been made up of worse moments than this. Emptying her mind, she sought control. Don 7 think. Don't think.
She'd give the boy what she could for the time being.
"Hey, sport!" Jake let the door close softly behind him as he yelled for Nicholas. Sarah puzzled him. Every time he thought he had a handle on her, she surprised him. He'd have bet the shine of tears over sea-blue eyes was real.
He knew he'd been vicious. Every time she retreated, he felt driven to slash at her. She hadn't cried, though.
The urge to comfort her startled him. He rubbed his chin hard, chasing away the imagined feel of her soft, wet skin against his palm. He wasn't interested in her pain, real or false. She'd get no sympathy from him.
4 'So, Jake, are we gonna get some worms and pop and go fishing?"
"Not right now, kid." Jake caught the flying body in his arms. "Hey. Careful, Nicholas. Warn a person before you jump on them."
"It's all right, Jake. I knew you'd catch me." Nicholas bumped Jake's chin companionably.
"Yeah, but warn me next time."
"Sure, Jake. Let's go fishing, now, okay?"
"Not right now, sport. We'll see about later."
"But, Jake—" Nicholas squirmed.
Jake explained the situation to him. For a long moment the boy clung to him, his small fist clutching Jake's collar. Powerless, Jake patted Nicholas's back. Jake wanted to leave, to take Nicholas with him and not come back. He wanted to let Sarah Jane Simpson keep her home filled with secrets and shadows. Jake swung Nicholas up on his shoulders and took long strides towards the orange VW under the porte cochere.
Absentmindedly Nicholas chewed on his fingernail.
"Stop that, sport." Looking at the painfully chewed nails, Jake winced.
"Oh yeah. I keep forgetting. It's just a bad habit I got. You got any bad habits?"
"Kid, you ask the craziest questions." Jake shook his head in frustration, thinking of several not-to-be mentioned habits. "I reckon I do. Maybe. I don't know!"
"Don't worry about it, Jake. You don't bite off your nails, anyway. I been watching."
"Good, now let's change the subject," Jake grunted.
"'Kay. I like it here, Jake. I've never been this near so much water. You gonna take me swimming while we're here? You said we'd stay while you took care of business." Nicholas thumped cheerfully on Jake's head.
How could he desert the boy now, with the whole mess still unsettled and himself the most unsettled of all? Jake's
brain told him to run like hell, but deep inside a barely heard plea cried out when he looked into the woman's pain-filled eyes.
Jake perched Nicholas on the steps from the porte coch-ere to the front porch and looked at the face that had grown so important to him. He was trapped.
"You'll be back, right, Jake?" Nicholas hid the worry.
Just as his mother, Sarah, had hid her tears.
"I said I'd never go off and leave
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