like that was an
insane risk. You could have drowned in that water if she had passed out. There
could have been a complication. She could have orphaned her children.”
“What stopped you?”
“I’ve seen a lot of abused kids in
my day, and Diana was barely holding herself together, but she took care of her
children. I visited her often over the next few days. The kids were clean, well
fed, and well loved. She was always putting Gabe back into his clothes, pulling
the twins into her lap, and helping them read passages out of The Odyssey. So
I gave Diana a chance to explain. She told me everything.”
“Oh.”
Dr. Lee’s frown digs deep into his
face. “Don’t get that bleating sheep look.” His aura flicks, and I tense.
“Diana was a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside a block of stubborn bigger than
the moon. She was the perfect hero, but that made her a lousy mother. Cold.
Driven. A Charybdis that sucked her children down into the depths of her
vendetta.”
“You don’t approve.”
“Of course not. Diana loved those
boys and their sister, but she put them on a path of pain. A path that will
lead them each into an early grave.” Dr. Lee’s gravelly voice is filled with
bitter notes.
“It was their choice,” I object
meekly. “Diana let them choose.”
“No,” Dr. Lee shakes his head. “She
didn’t do it on purpose, but there never was a choice.”
“I thought you were her friend.”
“I was.” His damn eyes won’t
flinch. “Caring about her, caring about her children is…” He stops, and his
eyes drift past me to the locked closet on the other side of the hall, “…the
burden of my life.” He sighs and presses two fingers against his left temple.
“Diana got cancer. Wouldn’t stop for one minute to get the chemo she needed.
Kept fighting the good fight until it killed her. Tammy’s dead, Tarren’s
broken, and Gabe will get there soon enough.”
“Don’t say that.”
“And now you.” Dr. Lee’s voice
softens. “The one who got away didn’t get very far at all.” His energy
brightens along the edges, pale yellows of frustration. “You were born twenty
years ago today. Happy birthday Maya.”
I am getting to my feet, but I sit
back down. I put my face in my hands, close my eyes, and stare into the hazy
black. My birthday is November 23rd, the day when Karen and Henry formally
adopted me. Of course they wouldn’t have known the real date.
“Tarren and Gabe brought you over
here tonight so you could learn who you are. Where you came from.” Tones of
gentleness sneak into Dr. Lee’s voice.
It’s a funny thing for him to say.
How can I ever know who I am when I’m two completely different beings locked in
constant conflict? How can I know where I came from when I spent my whole life
coming from somewhere else? Being someone else? And there’s still Grand’s
burning fingerprints smeared across my DNA. The double helixes of my personhood
zipper up his evil with Diana’s heroism, if she was even a hero at all. It is
all too big, too much, too slippery.
I get up to my feet, shaky. “Let’s,
uh, get back out there.”
The doctor stands up, and I hear
all the little pops and cracks of his joints, the sigh of pain that he keeps
tight lips over. He takes slow steps toward me and slips his arm through my
elbow. I brace myself against the touch of his energy.
“You be good to those boys,
especially Tarren. They have so little left.” Dr. Lee’s voice is rough as
gravel. He leans against me as we start to walk. He weighs almost nothing.
I should look him in the eye and
say, “I will,” all choked with emotion. But I don’t. I gaze down and bite my
lip.
“I’ll…I’ll try,” I say, because,
let’s be honest here, I can barely hold myself together, much less go around
spreading joy and love throughout the land. I am a danger. An albatross. The
dead kind. The kind that sinks ships.
Chapter 7
“Home sweet home,” Gabe crows as
Tarren pulls the SUV
insane risk. You could have drowned in that water if she had passed out. There
could have been a complication. She could have orphaned her children.”
“What stopped you?”
“I’ve seen a lot of abused kids in
my day, and Diana was barely holding herself together, but she took care of her
children. I visited her often over the next few days. The kids were clean, well
fed, and well loved. She was always putting Gabe back into his clothes, pulling
the twins into her lap, and helping them read passages out of The Odyssey. So
I gave Diana a chance to explain. She told me everything.”
“Oh.”
Dr. Lee’s frown digs deep into his
face. “Don’t get that bleating sheep look.” His aura flicks, and I tense.
“Diana was a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside a block of stubborn bigger than
the moon. She was the perfect hero, but that made her a lousy mother. Cold.
Driven. A Charybdis that sucked her children down into the depths of her
vendetta.”
“You don’t approve.”
“Of course not. Diana loved those
boys and their sister, but she put them on a path of pain. A path that will
lead them each into an early grave.” Dr. Lee’s gravelly voice is filled with
bitter notes.
“It was their choice,” I object
meekly. “Diana let them choose.”
“No,” Dr. Lee shakes his head. “She
didn’t do it on purpose, but there never was a choice.”
“I thought you were her friend.”
“I was.” His damn eyes won’t
flinch. “Caring about her, caring about her children is…” He stops, and his
eyes drift past me to the locked closet on the other side of the hall, “…the
burden of my life.” He sighs and presses two fingers against his left temple.
“Diana got cancer. Wouldn’t stop for one minute to get the chemo she needed.
Kept fighting the good fight until it killed her. Tammy’s dead, Tarren’s
broken, and Gabe will get there soon enough.”
“Don’t say that.”
“And now you.” Dr. Lee’s voice
softens. “The one who got away didn’t get very far at all.” His energy
brightens along the edges, pale yellows of frustration. “You were born twenty
years ago today. Happy birthday Maya.”
I am getting to my feet, but I sit
back down. I put my face in my hands, close my eyes, and stare into the hazy
black. My birthday is November 23rd, the day when Karen and Henry formally
adopted me. Of course they wouldn’t have known the real date.
“Tarren and Gabe brought you over
here tonight so you could learn who you are. Where you came from.” Tones of
gentleness sneak into Dr. Lee’s voice.
It’s a funny thing for him to say.
How can I ever know who I am when I’m two completely different beings locked in
constant conflict? How can I know where I came from when I spent my whole life
coming from somewhere else? Being someone else? And there’s still Grand’s
burning fingerprints smeared across my DNA. The double helixes of my personhood
zipper up his evil with Diana’s heroism, if she was even a hero at all. It is
all too big, too much, too slippery.
I get up to my feet, shaky. “Let’s,
uh, get back out there.”
The doctor stands up, and I hear
all the little pops and cracks of his joints, the sigh of pain that he keeps
tight lips over. He takes slow steps toward me and slips his arm through my
elbow. I brace myself against the touch of his energy.
“You be good to those boys,
especially Tarren. They have so little left.” Dr. Lee’s voice is rough as
gravel. He leans against me as we start to walk. He weighs almost nothing.
I should look him in the eye and
say, “I will,” all choked with emotion. But I don’t. I gaze down and bite my
lip.
“I’ll…I’ll try,” I say, because,
let’s be honest here, I can barely hold myself together, much less go around
spreading joy and love throughout the land. I am a danger. An albatross. The
dead kind. The kind that sinks ships.
Chapter 7
“Home sweet home,” Gabe crows as
Tarren pulls the SUV
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