Last Call by David Lee

’54 I think?
    wasn’t it a heart attackt back then?
    Yes sir
    You’re Lucy Beth Strachioner now aren’t you?
    married to Jimmy Don Strachioner who works
    up to Brown Brothers as a oiler, don’t he?
    secretary to the Principal down to the high school I believe?
    do I got that right?
    Jimmy Don he’s not a member of the Church is he?
    Yes sir and no sir, he’s a Baptist
    that’s exactly right
    Well what is it I can do for you today Miss Lucy Beth?
    Elder Ezell
    this is the hardest story of my life so far to tell
    and I don’t know rightly how to do it
    so I’ll just start before the beginning actually was
    It was dinnertime yesterday
    all the kids out to eat and drag main
    I had some time before the afternoon bell rang
    thought I’d run some errands go to the Post Office maybe the bank
    I went out to the parking lot to get in my car and do them
    but it wouldn’t start
    It wouldn’t run at all
    I went back to see if anybody could help
    but the whole building was empty and the phone system down
    the only thing I could do was walk home to see if Jimmy Don
    could come help me get it running if he was there
    that’s over half a mile
    when I got home it looked like nobody else was
    then I heard this noise from the back
    when I went to see he was there Jimmy Don
    and this high school girl with a terrible terrible reputation
    in our bed naked as the day they were born
    coupleating right in front of me
    I was so shocked I didn’t know what to do
    I have no idea what I said or did but I threw them both out
    and told Jimmy Don he shouldn’t never come back again
    but he finally did that night anyway
    he tried to explain it all away
    I didn’t let him
    I got the facts and the matter of it is
    he and that Kim Pierce child
    Walter and Mary Dell Pierce’s girl
    Yes sir, that one
    they’ve been carrying on that way
    ever since Charles Huffman’s homemade Halloween
    Horror Show back in October in our house right in my bed
    I seen her there that night selling tickets said Johnny Bert Ezell
    He said he was sorry and would try to make it up to me
    I told him to pack up his clothes go find somewhere else to live
    with his little high school extracurricular activity
    whose tardys I’d changed every one to unexcused absences
    now that I knew what she’d been doing all these months
    during 5th period Homemaking Class
    he said he didn’t have anywhere to go
    besides she’d already told him it was over between them
    she’d even got her boyfriend to understand
    and forgive her concubinal behavior
    so why wouldn’t I do the same thing for him
    as my Christian duty to be a subservient wife
    he slept on the couch by himself last night
    I know divorce is not appreciated by the Church of Christ
    but what am I supposed to do?
    I feel wronged
    dirty
    forsaken
    cheated upon
    adultered
    and mocked in the eyes of my community
    he won’t agree to go before his church or mine
    and beg forgiveness
    he says it is none of anybody’s business
    it is my duty as his wife to get over it and get on with our lives
    just the way it used to be
    I do not believe I can do this, Elder Ezell
    I believe I have to end either my marriage
    or my life
    I am so ashamed and embarrassed
    filled with anger and even hatred
    I don’t know what to do
    I don’t even know if I can go back to work
    I don’t know if I can attend church services
    I am so ashamed of it all
    that’s why I came to you
    Do you think you can kindly help me any?
    3
    Lucy Beth
    when a car won’t start
    the first thing I’d do was check the fuel gauge
    turn on the key and if the line don’t come up
    it’s probley out of gas and that’s your problem
    if there’s gas I’d raise the hood
    and look over the front down to the fuel filter
    if the glass bowl is empty it’s probley a clogged intake line
    if it isn’t see if it’s cloudy or has foreign matter