turned away and began deliberately shoving the little brush inside each vial of Cover-Up and carefully screwing closed each cap.
"Remember when my mother called us the Gold Dust Twins?" I asked.
"Your mother was a doll, but she saw things no one else did."
"Must run in the family. Remember Great Aunt Lillian? How she used you in her séances?"
"Did you bring my gift?" He repeated his question quietly but firmly.
"I brought it, but I still don't think..."
"What you think is inconsequential at this late date, Cuz."
"It's not that late."
"Be real for once. Nothing is working anymore."
"Nothing?"
"Oh, Dr. Jekyll says he recently discovered a T cell, and my Billy Reuben is about the same as that of an Arctic sardine." He turned to me. "But do let's face facts. I spike a fever to a hundred and four every other day. And it's already passed the brain-blood barrier and damaged my cerebral cortex. I can't remember anything anymore. Orkney's taken to using little yellow glue-on notes on things like salad forks and needle cases so we won't be too embarrassed."
"It's age, my own memory is—"
"Shut up and listen, Rog. My boats are burned," he said, carefully enunciating. "And I'm a big enough girl to realize it's time for a final Viking do. Shields inverted! Flames to the top of the mast! Floating out in Long Island Sound!"
I half sat, half collapsed on the toilet.
"Oh, come on! Don't be like that!" Alistair said brightly. "We've planned this for weeks. Don't spoil it."
"I can't believe it's... over."
"Look on the bright side, Cuz. You'll soon be the last queen left in New York who necked at Le Jardin with the son of a President in Office."
"I never did that."
"You did too! Stephen Ford. Was it Jack Ford? One of the Ford boys."
"Not me," I declared.
"It was. A big beefy blond. Remember? Fran Lebowitz was at the next table, and as we entered, you said, 'Don't let her see me,' even though she wouldn't have known you from King Kong. Ultraviolet came over to her table with Jack or Steve or Whomever Ford in tow, and he sat down next to you while she joined Fran, and next thing I knew you two were gone. I later found you in the men's room lounge pressed into the wallpaper doing the heaviest fully clothed petting act I've seen outside of Tijuana."
I remembered the incident, and the boy, but I still disbelieved him about it being one of President Ford's sons.
"If it is true," and I stopped him from interjecting, "who'll be around to remind me?"
"You'll remind yourself. You'll sit yourself down with magnums of Dom Perignon and write your memoirs."
"I never did anything, and what I did I'll need you to remember."
"It would be fun if I remained as a tiny voice. Who was that pretty boy in Ovid? Tithonus? He became Aurora's lover, and she managed to get him eternal life, but she forgot to ask for eternal youth too and he shriveled away to the size of a cricket."
"Tennyson," I said; "'The woods decay, the woods decay and fall.' Don't take them, Alistair!"
"Of course I'm going to take them. And you know what? I found these clever little things." He pulled out a little plastic packet of flesh-colored patches the size of a nickel. "Anti-Lupe Velez Syndrome patches," he said. "I place one on each pulse point on the back of my neck, and these'll keep me from getting nauseated and looking like shit when they find the body."
"Does the White— Does Orkney know about this?"
"He'll go to sleep in his usual sublime ignorance and awaken to what I trust will be only a tiny iota less ignorance tomorrow morning."
"What if something goes wrong? Shouldn't he know?"
"Be real, Cuz. He's one of those Vermont WASPs who cut open their bellies to keep their babies warm in winter. He'd never approve of me escaping from one second of earthly suffering."
"Wally too. We've argued over this all week."
"Really! I'd think he'd want to see me out of the way!"
"He's conflicted," I temporized.
"Neither of them have suffered as you and I have, Cuz.
"Remember when my mother called us the Gold Dust Twins?" I asked.
"Your mother was a doll, but she saw things no one else did."
"Must run in the family. Remember Great Aunt Lillian? How she used you in her séances?"
"Did you bring my gift?" He repeated his question quietly but firmly.
"I brought it, but I still don't think..."
"What you think is inconsequential at this late date, Cuz."
"It's not that late."
"Be real for once. Nothing is working anymore."
"Nothing?"
"Oh, Dr. Jekyll says he recently discovered a T cell, and my Billy Reuben is about the same as that of an Arctic sardine." He turned to me. "But do let's face facts. I spike a fever to a hundred and four every other day. And it's already passed the brain-blood barrier and damaged my cerebral cortex. I can't remember anything anymore. Orkney's taken to using little yellow glue-on notes on things like salad forks and needle cases so we won't be too embarrassed."
"It's age, my own memory is—"
"Shut up and listen, Rog. My boats are burned," he said, carefully enunciating. "And I'm a big enough girl to realize it's time for a final Viking do. Shields inverted! Flames to the top of the mast! Floating out in Long Island Sound!"
I half sat, half collapsed on the toilet.
"Oh, come on! Don't be like that!" Alistair said brightly. "We've planned this for weeks. Don't spoil it."
"I can't believe it's... over."
"Look on the bright side, Cuz. You'll soon be the last queen left in New York who necked at Le Jardin with the son of a President in Office."
"I never did that."
"You did too! Stephen Ford. Was it Jack Ford? One of the Ford boys."
"Not me," I declared.
"It was. A big beefy blond. Remember? Fran Lebowitz was at the next table, and as we entered, you said, 'Don't let her see me,' even though she wouldn't have known you from King Kong. Ultraviolet came over to her table with Jack or Steve or Whomever Ford in tow, and he sat down next to you while she joined Fran, and next thing I knew you two were gone. I later found you in the men's room lounge pressed into the wallpaper doing the heaviest fully clothed petting act I've seen outside of Tijuana."
I remembered the incident, and the boy, but I still disbelieved him about it being one of President Ford's sons.
"If it is true," and I stopped him from interjecting, "who'll be around to remind me?"
"You'll remind yourself. You'll sit yourself down with magnums of Dom Perignon and write your memoirs."
"I never did anything, and what I did I'll need you to remember."
"It would be fun if I remained as a tiny voice. Who was that pretty boy in Ovid? Tithonus? He became Aurora's lover, and she managed to get him eternal life, but she forgot to ask for eternal youth too and he shriveled away to the size of a cricket."
"Tennyson," I said; "'The woods decay, the woods decay and fall.' Don't take them, Alistair!"
"Of course I'm going to take them. And you know what? I found these clever little things." He pulled out a little plastic packet of flesh-colored patches the size of a nickel. "Anti-Lupe Velez Syndrome patches," he said. "I place one on each pulse point on the back of my neck, and these'll keep me from getting nauseated and looking like shit when they find the body."
"Does the White— Does Orkney know about this?"
"He'll go to sleep in his usual sublime ignorance and awaken to what I trust will be only a tiny iota less ignorance tomorrow morning."
"What if something goes wrong? Shouldn't he know?"
"Be real, Cuz. He's one of those Vermont WASPs who cut open their bellies to keep their babies warm in winter. He'd never approve of me escaping from one second of earthly suffering."
"Wally too. We've argued over this all week."
"Really! I'd think he'd want to see me out of the way!"
"He's conflicted," I temporized.
"Neither of them have suffered as you and I have, Cuz.
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