Lost in Love by Susane Colasanti

stay awake the rest of the night, staring at the darkness, playing scenarios over and over in my mind that would result in my sister being alive today. When my mom rushed in that time I screamed, I was so frustrated and sleep deprived that I finally told her what was going on.
    But I never should have told her. She would not drop it. She kept having these whispered conversations with my dad. They kept throwing me worried looks all the time. I’m like the last person you need to walk on eggshells around. People like being with me. They like my positive energy. They like that I have an optimistic attitude no matter how bad things get. My bright outlook inspires them to be positive, too. Brooke even said that being around me was like a shot of sunshine. So it was infuriating to have the peoplewho were supposed to love me more than anyone suddenly treat me like a different person. I couldn’t stand to be around them for another minute. I had to get out of there.
    Moving into a new place was supposed to give me a fresh start that would make the nightmares go away. I kept telling my mom that I didn’t need counseling. Or a support group. Or medication. I kept telling her that the annual Remembrance Walk was enough.
    But maybe I was wrong.
    There were times when I thought my brother, Marnix, should have gotten help. He basically locked himself in his room for all of high school. When my parents tried to talk to him, he’d yell at them and slam his door. Marnix slammed his door in my face lots of times, too. I know my parents are relieved that he’s away at college now. It’s hard to live with someone who shuts you out. Especially if they’re family.
    I’m not slamming doors in people’s faces. But am I shutting my mom out when I should be letting her in?

EIGHT
DARCY
    LOGAN WANTED TO TAKE ME out tonight. But there was no way I would desert Sadie in her moment of need. So I threw down some girl-time plans. I told Logan we could go out tomorrow night instead. Then I told Sadie to get ready to love the nightlife. Hoes over bros.
    This girl in my art history class is friends with a bouncer who works at the hottest new club. A bouncer who happens to be on tonight. She totally hooked me up. After dropping her name and working my charms, the bouncer let us in but made us swear not to drink or his ass would be grass. We’d never be let in here again if we crossed the adult beverage line. And I intend to crash this place more than once. So we scored a table and I ordered us virgin mojitos to enjoy while we watch everyone else making fools of their drunk selves.
    The DJ is on fire. He’s been laying down some sweet tracks that are making everyone rock to the beat. The dance floor is packed. Summer Fun Darcy would love this place if she were still on the prowl for boy adventures.
    â€œWhat’s in this?” Sadie asks after she takes the first sip of her drink.
    â€œGinger ale. Mint. Lime juice. Um . . . and sugar?”
    â€œThis is delicious.”
    â€œYay. So you’re happy to be out?”
    Sadie smiles. “Well, we haven’t seen anyone freak out yet. You promised a freakout.”
    â€œOh, there’ll be freaking out. Just you wait.”
    â€œMaybe some girl will even throw a drink in her boyfriend’s face.”
    â€œNice one.” I told Sadie all about how I threw that drink in Logan’s face after he dumped me. The day after he dumped me, to be exact. At Urth Caffe, which was our place. He was laughing with his friends like nothing catastrophic went down the day before. Like he wasn’t even a little bit sorry for ripping us apart. So yeah. I picked up his drink and threw it in his face. It was a badass move I’ve never regretted for a second.
    â€œDo you think it would make me feel better if I threw a drink in Austin’s face?” Sadie ponders.
    â€œI know I’d feel better. And you’d get to diss him publicly. We could track