what caused today's anger,
surprise and uncertainty?”
Oh, no!
“Did you feel everything that happened to me this
morning?”
“Aha.”
“And whycouldn’t I feel anything about you ?”
I wondered, putting my hands on my hips.
“I don’t know. Maybe you just didn’t have time to think
of me this morning,” he shrugged.
“Are you sayingthat as soon as you start to
think about me you can feel everything that I feel at that moment?”
“Eileen, I don’t know how it works. But I think, yes.
Let’s check it out.”
“How do you propose we try this?”
“Think about me. Try to feel what I feel at this very
moment. I’ll turn around, so you can’t read my emotions on my face.”
“Okay,” I nodded. “Let’sgive it a try.”
And then he turned away.
At first I just stared at his back, but felt nothing.
Then I closed my eyes and imagined... Him, kissing me yesterday. It confused me
even more. I felt my own pleasure, and tension.
“Christian, I can’t do this,” I said, giving up.
“Can you at least say what you feel? And I'll decide
whether it is right or not.”
“This is ridiculous! I feel only my own emotions.”
“What are they?” asked Christian without turning around.
“Well, the inexplicable joy, a sort of excitement and
inner peace.”
Looking up, I saw quite clearly, his smiling face.
“Eileen, you’ve just described everything that I feel at
the moment.”
“But, I don’t understand. I was sure there were my feelings.”
Christian raised my chin a little, our eyes were exactly
opposite each others’.
“Maybe our feelings are the same, and you can’t
determine where yours end and my own begin,” he said.
His touch caused a soft pulsing on my shoulder, I saw
the golden lines, shining with millions of colors coming from his hands to my
face. It felt so good. I stopped breathing and felt Christian’s fingers
caressing the line of my chin. He was standing so close, I could barely think
straight. Our proximity was playing funny tricks with my mind, making my body
tremble, imagining all the spicy pictures of us in each other’s arms in my
head. I swallowed I took a step back quickly. All the shining disappeared.
“See?” said softly Christian. “Our feelings are the
same.”
“I think we shouldn’t rush things,” I began hesitantly,
berating myself for the words that I didn’t want to say, but still willing to
make some kind of clarity in everything.
“And now you feel remorse and determination to do
something,” he admitted.
“Ah, please, don’t put me in an awkward situation! I
really don’t know what else to say. We both need time to sort all this out.”
I walked closer to him, took his hand and said without
paying attention to the beautiful golden light, instantly illuminating our
hands:
“I’m really glad that you're near, Christian. I felt
safe with you and yesterday you helped me a lot. But my life has turned upside
down just in two days! Give me a little time to recover,” looking hopefully
into his incredible emerald eyes, I said.
“As long as you need,” he replied softly, kissing me like
yesterday on the cheek before leaving.
Chapter 8. The
history of the founding families ( Eileen)
Going to my first lesson with Evan, I just couldn’t stop
thinking about Christian. This time I really felt everything. A mix of
frustration and resentment from my last words took most of him. Trying to focus
on his feelings as best as possible, I could discern a thin ray of hope from
which the entire range of his emotions instantly lit up with warm golden light.
This warmth passed to me, greatly improving my gloomy mood.
“Weird,” I thought, but the warmth seemed to be not just
a feeling...
“Eileen!” called Evan, adjusting to my steps. “Ready for
the first lecture?
“Does it really matter?” I asked, still thinking about
Christian.
“Of course!” he said
surprise and uncertainty?”
Oh, no!
“Did you feel everything that happened to me this
morning?”
“Aha.”
“And whycouldn’t I feel anything about you ?”
I wondered, putting my hands on my hips.
“I don’t know. Maybe you just didn’t have time to think
of me this morning,” he shrugged.
“Are you sayingthat as soon as you start to
think about me you can feel everything that I feel at that moment?”
“Eileen, I don’t know how it works. But I think, yes.
Let’s check it out.”
“How do you propose we try this?”
“Think about me. Try to feel what I feel at this very
moment. I’ll turn around, so you can’t read my emotions on my face.”
“Okay,” I nodded. “Let’sgive it a try.”
And then he turned away.
At first I just stared at his back, but felt nothing.
Then I closed my eyes and imagined... Him, kissing me yesterday. It confused me
even more. I felt my own pleasure, and tension.
“Christian, I can’t do this,” I said, giving up.
“Can you at least say what you feel? And I'll decide
whether it is right or not.”
“This is ridiculous! I feel only my own emotions.”
“What are they?” asked Christian without turning around.
“Well, the inexplicable joy, a sort of excitement and
inner peace.”
Looking up, I saw quite clearly, his smiling face.
“Eileen, you’ve just described everything that I feel at
the moment.”
“But, I don’t understand. I was sure there were my feelings.”
Christian raised my chin a little, our eyes were exactly
opposite each others’.
“Maybe our feelings are the same, and you can’t
determine where yours end and my own begin,” he said.
His touch caused a soft pulsing on my shoulder, I saw
the golden lines, shining with millions of colors coming from his hands to my
face. It felt so good. I stopped breathing and felt Christian’s fingers
caressing the line of my chin. He was standing so close, I could barely think
straight. Our proximity was playing funny tricks with my mind, making my body
tremble, imagining all the spicy pictures of us in each other’s arms in my
head. I swallowed I took a step back quickly. All the shining disappeared.
“See?” said softly Christian. “Our feelings are the
same.”
“I think we shouldn’t rush things,” I began hesitantly,
berating myself for the words that I didn’t want to say, but still willing to
make some kind of clarity in everything.
“And now you feel remorse and determination to do
something,” he admitted.
“Ah, please, don’t put me in an awkward situation! I
really don’t know what else to say. We both need time to sort all this out.”
I walked closer to him, took his hand and said without
paying attention to the beautiful golden light, instantly illuminating our
hands:
“I’m really glad that you're near, Christian. I felt
safe with you and yesterday you helped me a lot. But my life has turned upside
down just in two days! Give me a little time to recover,” looking hopefully
into his incredible emerald eyes, I said.
“As long as you need,” he replied softly, kissing me like
yesterday on the cheek before leaving.
Chapter 8. The
history of the founding families ( Eileen)
Going to my first lesson with Evan, I just couldn’t stop
thinking about Christian. This time I really felt everything. A mix of
frustration and resentment from my last words took most of him. Trying to focus
on his feelings as best as possible, I could discern a thin ray of hope from
which the entire range of his emotions instantly lit up with warm golden light.
This warmth passed to me, greatly improving my gloomy mood.
“Weird,” I thought, but the warmth seemed to be not just
a feeling...
“Eileen!” called Evan, adjusting to my steps. “Ready for
the first lecture?
“Does it really matter?” I asked, still thinking about
Christian.
“Of course!” he said
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