he spoke, the signs dissipated, their puns expended, and coursed into his open bag.
“N puns,” she groaned. “And I fell for it.”
“Such things aren’t necessarily obvious, until a person gets the key.”
“Now their villages are gone, too,” she said. “I hope we didn’t wipe out a lot of innocent people.”
“They were illusion, to help set up their puns.” He glanced back. “Except for the first sign, which it seems was just a sign.”
“It’s changed,” she said.
“So it is,” he agreed, surprised. For now it said WELCOME TO V.
“I will collect these,” she said, opening her pun bag. New direction signs had appeared, and she read each off in turn. As she did, the signs dissipated and floated obedienly into her bag. “V Ear makes a person turn away. V Toe prohibits things. V Ickle—” She paused, not getting it immediately.
“Vehicle,” Bryce said. “You can ride in it.”
“Thank you. And V Gan will avoid all meat.”
They waited, but the sign did not dissipate, and its village did not disappear. That was curious.
“Go on to the next,” Bryce suggested.
But the next sign said N. “I thought we already handled that letter.”
“Maybe it’s the town of N in the V section,” Bryce suggested. “V N.”
“Or N V,” she said. “Envy!”
Now the sign dissipated.
They had cleaned up all the puns except V Gan. Had they gotten it wrong?
“Could it be a real town, not a pun illusion?” Bryce asked.
“Why don’t we go see.” They walked down the path to the village. It did indeed seem real.
There were even people in it. An ordinary man and a lovely woman were sunning themselves in deck chairs near an outlying house. “Oh my gosh,” Mindy breathed.
“A problem?”
“Not exactly. I recognize them. They’re famous in Xanth. I will have to introduce you.”
“As you wish.” He had met so many people he doubted he would long remember two more.
Mindy forged ahead with unusual energy. “Hello!” she called. “I am Melinda, Mindy for short. A servant at Caprice Castle. Maybe you remember me.”
The two looked at her, then at each other. “Maybe we do, Melinda,” the man said.
“Mindy,” the woman agreed.
“This is Bryce, recently from Mundania,” Mindy said. “So I, as a former Mundane, am showing him around. We are collecting puns for storage in Caprice Castle.”
“How do you do, Bryce,” the man said. “I am Bink.” Mindy, evidently flustered, had forgotten to introduce them to Bryce. Just how important were they?
“And I am Chameleon,” the woman said. “In my pretty phase.”
“You certainly are pretty,” Bryce said.
The dogs, bored with this, settled down for a nap.
Bink smiled. “My wife is a woman of cycles. In the course of each month she gradually shifts from lovely and stupid to ugly and intelligent, passing through average in each respect. Today she is beautiful, but not much for dialogue.”
“You like me better this way than when I’m smart,” Chameleon said accusingly.
“I like you every way,” Bink said, taking her hand and squeezing it. “In different ways.”
“But you manage to keep your hands off me when I’m smart.”
“We have been through this before, dear.”
“Oh, have we? I’m sorry. I don’t remember.”
“Bryce was an old man in Mundania,” Mindy said. “Now he’s young. Maybe you could help him adjust.”
“Ah,” Bink said. “How old were you, Bryce?”
“Eighty,” Bryce said. “Now I seem to be twenty-one.”
“He’s part of a Demon contest,” Mindy said. “He has to compete for the hand of Princess Harmony. He is not easy with that.”
“Ah, I see,” Bink said. “Let me reassure you, Bryce. Age is no barrier.”
“But she’s only sixteen!” Bryce said. “I have granddaughters older than that.”
Bink smiled. “So do I.”
“He is the Princess Harmony’s great-grandfather,” Mindy said.
“But he can’t be over thirty-five, if that.”
“Thirty-four,” Bink
“N puns,” she groaned. “And I fell for it.”
“Such things aren’t necessarily obvious, until a person gets the key.”
“Now their villages are gone, too,” she said. “I hope we didn’t wipe out a lot of innocent people.”
“They were illusion, to help set up their puns.” He glanced back. “Except for the first sign, which it seems was just a sign.”
“It’s changed,” she said.
“So it is,” he agreed, surprised. For now it said WELCOME TO V.
“I will collect these,” she said, opening her pun bag. New direction signs had appeared, and she read each off in turn. As she did, the signs dissipated and floated obedienly into her bag. “V Ear makes a person turn away. V Toe prohibits things. V Ickle—” She paused, not getting it immediately.
“Vehicle,” Bryce said. “You can ride in it.”
“Thank you. And V Gan will avoid all meat.”
They waited, but the sign did not dissipate, and its village did not disappear. That was curious.
“Go on to the next,” Bryce suggested.
But the next sign said N. “I thought we already handled that letter.”
“Maybe it’s the town of N in the V section,” Bryce suggested. “V N.”
“Or N V,” she said. “Envy!”
Now the sign dissipated.
They had cleaned up all the puns except V Gan. Had they gotten it wrong?
“Could it be a real town, not a pun illusion?” Bryce asked.
“Why don’t we go see.” They walked down the path to the village. It did indeed seem real.
There were even people in it. An ordinary man and a lovely woman were sunning themselves in deck chairs near an outlying house. “Oh my gosh,” Mindy breathed.
“A problem?”
“Not exactly. I recognize them. They’re famous in Xanth. I will have to introduce you.”
“As you wish.” He had met so many people he doubted he would long remember two more.
Mindy forged ahead with unusual energy. “Hello!” she called. “I am Melinda, Mindy for short. A servant at Caprice Castle. Maybe you remember me.”
The two looked at her, then at each other. “Maybe we do, Melinda,” the man said.
“Mindy,” the woman agreed.
“This is Bryce, recently from Mundania,” Mindy said. “So I, as a former Mundane, am showing him around. We are collecting puns for storage in Caprice Castle.”
“How do you do, Bryce,” the man said. “I am Bink.” Mindy, evidently flustered, had forgotten to introduce them to Bryce. Just how important were they?
“And I am Chameleon,” the woman said. “In my pretty phase.”
“You certainly are pretty,” Bryce said.
The dogs, bored with this, settled down for a nap.
Bink smiled. “My wife is a woman of cycles. In the course of each month she gradually shifts from lovely and stupid to ugly and intelligent, passing through average in each respect. Today she is beautiful, but not much for dialogue.”
“You like me better this way than when I’m smart,” Chameleon said accusingly.
“I like you every way,” Bink said, taking her hand and squeezing it. “In different ways.”
“But you manage to keep your hands off me when I’m smart.”
“We have been through this before, dear.”
“Oh, have we? I’m sorry. I don’t remember.”
“Bryce was an old man in Mundania,” Mindy said. “Now he’s young. Maybe you could help him adjust.”
“Ah,” Bink said. “How old were you, Bryce?”
“Eighty,” Bryce said. “Now I seem to be twenty-one.”
“He’s part of a Demon contest,” Mindy said. “He has to compete for the hand of Princess Harmony. He is not easy with that.”
“Ah, I see,” Bink said. “Let me reassure you, Bryce. Age is no barrier.”
“But she’s only sixteen!” Bryce said. “I have granddaughters older than that.”
Bink smiled. “So do I.”
“He is the Princess Harmony’s great-grandfather,” Mindy said.
“But he can’t be over thirty-five, if that.”
“Thirty-four,” Bink
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