Man From the USSR & Other Plays by Vladimir Nabokov Page B

you?
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
    What does being careful have to do with it? I’m talking about money.
    Â 
    OLGA PAVLOVNA
    I’m particularly afraid this time. But I’m glad for you. Really, I’m very glad.
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
    Good.
(Marianna runs back in.)
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    The landlady is grouchy today—she says the phonograph is broken.
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    OLGA PAVLOVNA
    Oh, well, you’ll do it another time.
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    I told the maid to bring some coffee. She seems grouchy too.
(a knock at the door. Maid’s voice:
“Besuch für Frau Kuznetsoff. ”)
    Â 
    OLGA PAVLOVNA
Für mich?(goes out)
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    Now, kiss me—quick!
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
    No, no—please don’t rush me, madam.
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    Why “madam”? Why are you always so distant? When will you learn to be less formal with me ? You don’t want to kiss me ? Alec!
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
    Oh well, why not....
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    No, now I don’t want to.
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
    Oh, I keep forgetting to tell you—you shouldn’t use any perfume at all.
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    This is an excellent perfume. You don’t understand a thing. It’s Houbigant.
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
(sings half-voice)

And my beloved hooligan
gave me an ounce of Houbigant 4 ...
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    No, it was from a former admirer. Are you jealous?
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
    Marianna, you want to know the truth?
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    Yes, of course.
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
    All right—I’m not the least bit jealous,
(picks up the photograph and examines it again)
I’ve seen that face before.
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    He was shot by the Bolsheviks last year. In Moscow,
(pause)
And why do you call me “madam”? It’s getting unbearable! Alec, wake up!
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
    (puts down the portrait, which he has been holding, lost in thought)
Unbearable, is it? Less unbearable than “Alec.”
    Â 
    MARIANNA
(perching on the arm of his chair and changing her tone of voice)

You’re an awfully strange man. I’ve never had such a strange love affair. I can’t even understand how it happened. The way we met in the cellar. Then that crazy drunken evening with the Baron and Lyulya—It’s only been four days—yet it seems so long ago, doesn’t it? I can’t understand why I love you.... You’re an ugly little thing. But I love you. You’ve got lots of charm. I love to kiss you here ... and here....
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
    You promised me some coffee.
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    It’s coming in a minute, my darling. Tell me, what if your wife—Oh yes!—tell me, you’re not a Bolshevik, are you?
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
    A Bolshevik, madam, a real Bolshevik.
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    Cut it out—you keep kidding with me. It’s strange. You don’t appreciate one bit the fact that a refined woman like me got infatuated with you of all people. Don’t start thinking it’s love—it’s only an infatuation. When I get tired of a lover I drop him like a wilted flower. But today you are mine, today you may love me. Why don’t you say something?
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
    Forgot my lines.
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    You’re absolutely impossible! You ... you ... I simply don’t know what you are. You refuse to tell me anything about yourself. Wait, just a minute.... Darling.... Listen, Alec, why don’t you want me to move into the hotel with you? That’s the only place we meet anyway. Alec?
    Â 
    KUZNETSOFF
    Listen, Marianna Sergeyevna, let’s agree once and for all—no questions.
    Â 
    MARIANNA
    All right, all right, I won’t ask anything more. But I just don’t understand. Why?
    (voices outside the door. Then Olga Pavlovna brings in Yevghenia Vasilyevna Oshivenski, and Oshivenski himself follows. Yevghenia Vasilyevna is a plump old lady, dressed all in black, with slightly protruding eyes.)
    Â 
    OLGA PAVLOVNA
    These people want to migrate over to your room, Marianna