aid and clear thinking had saved him from bleeding out on the floor.
Now she sputtered a little as she tried not to sob against his shoulder. “That’s the problem. I’m so thankful I was there to back you up, and I’m proud that I saved you, but the thought of having to draw my gun again … to use it … gives me the creeps. I could do it if I had to—I know that—but the fact is that I walk around with a little ball of dread in my gut all the time, even here in Eternity Springs where the crime rate is next to nothing. I don’t want to live this way, Zach.”
“Then you shouldn’t.”
“That’s what my counselor said, but this is my career. I wanted to be a cop, and the bottom line is that I can’t cut it. That makes me feel lousy.”
“That’s bull,” Zach fired back. “The bottom line is that you did your job when it counted most.”
“But that’s before the little ball of dread. I can’t be counted on to be there the next time. I don’t trust myself.”
Zach let out a snort of derision. He’d taken a life in the line of duty before, so he could relate to what she was feeling, but he also knew his sister. He stepped back and held her upper arms, waiting until she met his gaze to say, “Well, that’s just silly. I understand leaving if you’re not happy. That’s no way to go through life. But don’t do it because you don’t believe in yourself, Gabi. There’s not a doubt in my mind that you wouldn’t perform under fire or in any sort of emergency. Frankly, if I had any doubt at all, I wouldn’t have put you back on the job.”
She let out a long sigh. “I wish I could be as certain. But even if I were, I don’t think I’d want to stay. Something has changed in me since the shooting, Zach. It makes me sad, but the uniform doesn’t suit me.”
“Tell that to all the male tourists who get whiplash watching you stroll around town.”
“I said it didn’t suit me, not that it didn’t look good on me.” She sniffed pridefully, then grinned for an instant before becoming serious once more. “I feel like I’m at a crossroads. It’s time for me to turn in a different direction.”
A thought occurred to Zach, and his heart gave a little lurch. “Will you stay in Eternity Springs?”
“Definitely. I’m going to ask Mom if I can work with her at the B&B. She’s going to need help whether she’ll admit it or not.”
“True.” Zach wondered, though, if having Gabi as Maggie’s helper was a good idea. He’d never forget the argument they’d had over how to scramble eggs when he was convalescing. Those were two hardheaded women.
“So, you and I are okay? You don’t think I’m a coward?”
Zach grinned. “You and I are just fine, and I think it takes an exceedingly brave person to want to work with our mother.”
Ruefully, Gabi shrugged. “Maybe I’m just crazy.”
“Maybe.”
They discussed resignation-related procedures for a few minutes, then Gabi departed. Watching her go, Zach experienced a vague sense of unease. He knew the woman well as a deputy and a friend. He knew her less well as a sister. Was the idea of working with their mother a good thing for Gabi and Maggie, or a bad thing for them both? Adult children working with parents faced a peculiar set of challenges. For that matter, parents working with adult children did, too. And Maggie was still trying to figure out widowhood.
Yikes. Maybe he should try to talk to them, caution them. Better yet, get Savannah to do it. She was tight with both Gabi and Maggie.
No, he’d better stay out of it. When did an attempt to mediate with two women ever work out for a man?
Nevertheless, in the wake of Gabi’s announcement, he felt the need to share his concern with someone who had a better grasp on the effect of this development on his newfound family. Since this was still his day off, he figured he could multitask.
Twenty minutes later, he pulled his pickup into the drive at the house that would be his
Now she sputtered a little as she tried not to sob against his shoulder. “That’s the problem. I’m so thankful I was there to back you up, and I’m proud that I saved you, but the thought of having to draw my gun again … to use it … gives me the creeps. I could do it if I had to—I know that—but the fact is that I walk around with a little ball of dread in my gut all the time, even here in Eternity Springs where the crime rate is next to nothing. I don’t want to live this way, Zach.”
“Then you shouldn’t.”
“That’s what my counselor said, but this is my career. I wanted to be a cop, and the bottom line is that I can’t cut it. That makes me feel lousy.”
“That’s bull,” Zach fired back. “The bottom line is that you did your job when it counted most.”
“But that’s before the little ball of dread. I can’t be counted on to be there the next time. I don’t trust myself.”
Zach let out a snort of derision. He’d taken a life in the line of duty before, so he could relate to what she was feeling, but he also knew his sister. He stepped back and held her upper arms, waiting until she met his gaze to say, “Well, that’s just silly. I understand leaving if you’re not happy. That’s no way to go through life. But don’t do it because you don’t believe in yourself, Gabi. There’s not a doubt in my mind that you wouldn’t perform under fire or in any sort of emergency. Frankly, if I had any doubt at all, I wouldn’t have put you back on the job.”
She let out a long sigh. “I wish I could be as certain. But even if I were, I don’t think I’d want to stay. Something has changed in me since the shooting, Zach. It makes me sad, but the uniform doesn’t suit me.”
“Tell that to all the male tourists who get whiplash watching you stroll around town.”
“I said it didn’t suit me, not that it didn’t look good on me.” She sniffed pridefully, then grinned for an instant before becoming serious once more. “I feel like I’m at a crossroads. It’s time for me to turn in a different direction.”
A thought occurred to Zach, and his heart gave a little lurch. “Will you stay in Eternity Springs?”
“Definitely. I’m going to ask Mom if I can work with her at the B&B. She’s going to need help whether she’ll admit it or not.”
“True.” Zach wondered, though, if having Gabi as Maggie’s helper was a good idea. He’d never forget the argument they’d had over how to scramble eggs when he was convalescing. Those were two hardheaded women.
“So, you and I are okay? You don’t think I’m a coward?”
Zach grinned. “You and I are just fine, and I think it takes an exceedingly brave person to want to work with our mother.”
Ruefully, Gabi shrugged. “Maybe I’m just crazy.”
“Maybe.”
They discussed resignation-related procedures for a few minutes, then Gabi departed. Watching her go, Zach experienced a vague sense of unease. He knew the woman well as a deputy and a friend. He knew her less well as a sister. Was the idea of working with their mother a good thing for Gabi and Maggie, or a bad thing for them both? Adult children working with parents faced a peculiar set of challenges. For that matter, parents working with adult children did, too. And Maggie was still trying to figure out widowhood.
Yikes. Maybe he should try to talk to them, caution them. Better yet, get Savannah to do it. She was tight with both Gabi and Maggie.
No, he’d better stay out of it. When did an attempt to mediate with two women ever work out for a man?
Nevertheless, in the wake of Gabi’s announcement, he felt the need to share his concern with someone who had a better grasp on the effect of this development on his newfound family. Since this was still his day off, he figured he could multitask.
Twenty minutes later, he pulled his pickup into the drive at the house that would be his
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