Mooch by Dan Fante

until she left the building. No one would bother me there.
    Walking down the hall past the payroll office, the glass door suddenly swung open. It was Jimmi, her check envelope in her hand. A young male employee was holding the door, watching her pass, leering at her ass. Then, a second later, McGee came out too.
    Seeing me, uncomfortable but trying to act pleased, she shuffled up. ‘Yo mijo,’ she whispered, ‘where you been? I’ve been looking for you.’
    She pulled me a few feet down the corridor and gave mea long hug. ‘I found out I’m okay,’ she hummed. ‘My orders went through and got verified. I made quota again. I got my check.’
    Face to face with her, I was wet bread. ‘Look,’ I said, fumbling for my two Orbit checks, pointing at the numbers, grinning like an idiot, ‘I’m rich. Over two grand. Let’s drive to the beach. We’ll have dinner.’
    Her smile was a wonder. The eyes, two flawless blazing blue beads. ‘Sorry, baby,’ she whispered, pulling me closer, ‘I can’t. I’m staying. Rick’s been helping me, coaching me with my pitch. We’re going to get a bite, then go back to his office.’
    She was lying, and I knew it. My anger hissed like spit. ‘It’s Friday night, Jimmi,’ I snarled. ‘Almost six o’clock, Friday-fucking-night.’
    ‘Man, shhhh! Keep your voice down. He’s helping me. He wants to work late. Okay?’
    ‘Hey, what about this, I’ll come too. I need his fucking “help” too.’
    ‘I said no, Bruno. Okay? I tol’jou, man. I’m busy.’
    I was yelling now. ‘How fucking stupid do you think I am?! You’re sucking McGee’s dick!’
    ‘Mind jour bizniz, motherfucker!’
    I was out of control, but I couldn’t stop. ‘Answer this then: while you’re fucking him, do you whisper that you want it up the ass!!? Do you beg him to cum in your mouth?’
    She stepped back. ‘I said shut your face, man!’
    ‘Did you lick his asshole?’
    She tried to edge herself down the hall in the direction of the ladies room, but I grabbed her arm. Screaming, she pulled back, but I held on.
    The commotion brought tall McGee rumbling down thecorridor. ‘Let her go, Dante,’ he demanded, cuffing me from behind. ‘Let the woman go. Right now!’
    Freeing one hand, I shoved him off. ‘Tell the truth, asshole! I want to know! Are you fucking my whore?’
    ‘Last time, Dante. Let go!’
    ‘Lick my scrotum, gerbil shitbrain!’
    McGee’s punches came in rapid succession. By the time the throbbing started, I was sitting on the floor with my back against the hallway wall, holding my nose, blood and snot dripping down on my shirt from between my fingers.

Chapter Nine
    THE MONDAY MORNING following the trouble, I was drinking coffee, taking a break, demonstrating a quick close technique to my new teammate, Neil. A move I had learned while selling porno movies. It works like this: The mooch says, ‘Look, I don’t need any videos (or light bulbs or gizmos) right now. I’ve got a year’s supply in my storage room.’ Acting surprised, the salesman says, ‘Look Bob, I would never want to overstock you. But let me ask you this: it’s your department, you’re the boss, right?’
    The quick close works eight out of ten times. I mean, what’s the mooch going to say to that kind of question—‘No, I’m a lackey, I only clean the toilets here.’
    Out of the corner of my eye, I watched Frankie Freebase come down the stairs from a meeting in Kammegian’s office. He walked directly to my cubicle, then motioned for Neil to go back to his own desk. ‘You’re wanted upstairs in the boss’s office,’ he said, spitting the words. ‘Now!’
    ‘Okay. What for?’
    ‘Well, dicko, let’s just say that Kammegian ain’t invitin’ you up there to present you with a new Chevy SUV. Get goin’.’
    I slid my chair back and stood up.
    Frankie was leering. ‘You didn’t tell me what happened outside Payroll last Friday. Now, you’re fucked.’
    ‘It was an argument. Nothing. It