She was texting or something on her phone now.
Maybe I should just go talk to her? Otherwise this trip was a waste, too. Then a woman with two little kids all bundled up came trudging up to the bus stop. She sat them on the bus bench and sat down hard herself.
I was trying to remember which buses came to this stop when I saw the bus coming up to the intersection. It had to stop for the red so I had plenty of time to read the places it went. Through the city, downtown, then a mall. That didnât help.
The bus came up to the stop, and they all got on. Then as it pulled away, I felt my whole body being pulled, like someone had tied a rope around me.
Thank God there was no fence around this yard, or I would have run right into it. I had no choice but to run. I tumbled down the little hill onto the sidewalk and sprinted after the bus. Coach would have been impressed with how fast I was running, but it wasnât like I had a choice. Finally, blessedly, I was gone. Then back in my room, puking right on the towel with perfect aim.
chapter twenty-four
Maybe youâll be surprised to hear and maybe you wonât that I did it again that night. Twice. You can bet by the end there was absolutely nothing left to come up and I was just dry heaving. And what did I learn? Nothing.
And then I tried again the next day, Monday. Skipped practice and came right home to jump into the future over and over from the privacy of my bedroom. I did see a few interesting things, I guess.
I only saw myself with him one other time, and it was in April again. I was outside my house, and all of a sudden they came out together. (He met my parents?! Whoa.) Then they got into a nice SUV. They talked or maybe made out for a couple minutesâI couldnât see into it very well from where I was crouched. And good thing, because if I had still been there when they pulled away, would I have been forced to run after the car like the bus?
What would happen, I wondered, if I had arrived in the future while they were driving? Would I have landed in the backseat? Or on the road and then gotten hit by another car? Could I die on one of these trips in the future? The idea scared me.
The other stuff was all ordinary, boring life. Nothing in January, February, or March to tell me if sheâd already met him or not. She was on her phone a lot, but that was probably how I always looked.
Oh, and I guess I was going to finally get off my butt and do a volunteer thing like my counselor always said looked good on college applications. Once after school, I saw myself walking a few dogs and then going into some animal shelter building. Unless that meant my parents let me get a dog finally, but I couldnât see that happening.
All this wasnât doing my body any favors, believe me. But I couldnât stop. I skipped school on Tuesday. Didnât even try to play sick with my parents, just made sure my mom left and then went back in my room and closed the door. It was so easy.
By now I wasnât even looking at the calendar or thinking much about the best times. I was just going into the future over and over. Sometimes I even forgot why. I saw myself (or at least my shoes) in the bathroom at church. At a cross-country meet. Out with people from school, some of them I wasnât friends with now. At the grocery store.
The last trip I could manage on Tuesday before I passed out, I watched myself sleep again. On December 20 at 12:30. I didnât even know if that was a school night or what. I think I even fell asleep myself in the future before I was pulled back to my room and collapsed on my bed.
I woke up to my dad shaking my shoulder.
âLayla, Layla!â
I had never seen that look on his face before. His eyes were wide.
âHoney, what happened? I didnât even know you were home. Did you come home sick or ⦠?â
I closed my eyes again. âI donât feel good. I just wanna sleep.â
âOK, baby girl, OK. You
Maybe I should just go talk to her? Otherwise this trip was a waste, too. Then a woman with two little kids all bundled up came trudging up to the bus stop. She sat them on the bus bench and sat down hard herself.
I was trying to remember which buses came to this stop when I saw the bus coming up to the intersection. It had to stop for the red so I had plenty of time to read the places it went. Through the city, downtown, then a mall. That didnât help.
The bus came up to the stop, and they all got on. Then as it pulled away, I felt my whole body being pulled, like someone had tied a rope around me.
Thank God there was no fence around this yard, or I would have run right into it. I had no choice but to run. I tumbled down the little hill onto the sidewalk and sprinted after the bus. Coach would have been impressed with how fast I was running, but it wasnât like I had a choice. Finally, blessedly, I was gone. Then back in my room, puking right on the towel with perfect aim.
chapter twenty-four
Maybe youâll be surprised to hear and maybe you wonât that I did it again that night. Twice. You can bet by the end there was absolutely nothing left to come up and I was just dry heaving. And what did I learn? Nothing.
And then I tried again the next day, Monday. Skipped practice and came right home to jump into the future over and over from the privacy of my bedroom. I did see a few interesting things, I guess.
I only saw myself with him one other time, and it was in April again. I was outside my house, and all of a sudden they came out together. (He met my parents?! Whoa.) Then they got into a nice SUV. They talked or maybe made out for a couple minutesâI couldnât see into it very well from where I was crouched. And good thing, because if I had still been there when they pulled away, would I have been forced to run after the car like the bus?
What would happen, I wondered, if I had arrived in the future while they were driving? Would I have landed in the backseat? Or on the road and then gotten hit by another car? Could I die on one of these trips in the future? The idea scared me.
The other stuff was all ordinary, boring life. Nothing in January, February, or March to tell me if sheâd already met him or not. She was on her phone a lot, but that was probably how I always looked.
Oh, and I guess I was going to finally get off my butt and do a volunteer thing like my counselor always said looked good on college applications. Once after school, I saw myself walking a few dogs and then going into some animal shelter building. Unless that meant my parents let me get a dog finally, but I couldnât see that happening.
All this wasnât doing my body any favors, believe me. But I couldnât stop. I skipped school on Tuesday. Didnât even try to play sick with my parents, just made sure my mom left and then went back in my room and closed the door. It was so easy.
By now I wasnât even looking at the calendar or thinking much about the best times. I was just going into the future over and over. Sometimes I even forgot why. I saw myself (or at least my shoes) in the bathroom at church. At a cross-country meet. Out with people from school, some of them I wasnât friends with now. At the grocery store.
The last trip I could manage on Tuesday before I passed out, I watched myself sleep again. On December 20 at 12:30. I didnât even know if that was a school night or what. I think I even fell asleep myself in the future before I was pulled back to my room and collapsed on my bed.
I woke up to my dad shaking my shoulder.
âLayla, Layla!â
I had never seen that look on his face before. His eyes were wide.
âHoney, what happened? I didnât even know you were home. Did you come home sick or ⦠?â
I closed my eyes again. âI donât feel good. I just wanna sleep.â
âOK, baby girl, OK. You
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