wine and leaned back in her chair, listening as Nell talked about the wide African skies she’d camped under, the vibrant coral reefs she’d scuba-dived, the noise and smells and bustle of her favourite market in India . . .
She was envious, she realized. She’d come here this weekend feeling as if she had the perfect life all wrapped up, but suddenly she was starting to doubt her conviction. There she’d been at lunchtime, worrying that her friends might think her smug, that they might covet her life, her husband and children. Now she wondered if they actually pitied her for taking the motherhood path while they’d flung themselves into adventures and professional triumphs instead.
She had nothing to contribute to this conversation, she thought helplessly, no adventures of her own to report. She couldn’t join in knowledgably when Lisa spoke about boardroom dramas. She couldn’t add anecdotes to Nell’s travelling stories. Her life had become so safe, so predictable, so boring in comparison! She’d been somebody’s wife, somebody’s mum for too long, lost her sparkly Josieness, lost her bottle . . .
She sipped her wine again. Still, it wasn’t too late to change things, was it? She didn’t have to spend the rest of her life like this. Now that the boys were older, maybe she and Pete could afford to be more impulsive, take a few risks? Maybe they could all go on an adventure together!
She grinned to herself. Yes. She’d suggest it. They should definitely break out of the safety chamber and go somewhere exciting before Rose was born. That way, next time she and her friends met up, she’d have tales of her own to tell again, wouldn’t she?
Chapter Four
‘Smile!’
Josie beamed into the camera and blinked in the flash that followed. She, Lisa and Nell were the only people left in the Italian restaurant now and their waiter had taken a break from pointedly sweeping up around their table to snap a photo of them with Nell’s camera.
‘Thanks. That’s one for the family album,’ Nell said, winking at him. ‘Could we have the bill, please?’
‘I’ll get this,’ Lisa said, skimming through a wedge of credit cards in a smart Mulberry wallet. ‘My treat.’
‘As if,’ Nell said, planting a twenty-pound note in the centre of the table. ‘We should be treating you, for being our hostess with the mostest tonight.’
Lisa batted away Nell’s money. ‘You two paid train fares to come to London,’ she countered. ‘So this can be my contribution.’
Besides, I’m loaded and this paltry bill is nothing to me , a nasty little voice added in Josie’s head. ‘Well, we’ll pay for the cab back,’ she said quickly, trying to shut out her uncharitable thoughts. ‘Won’t we, Nell?’
‘Cab back? We haven’t started yet,’ Lisa said in surprise. ‘I thought we were going clubbing after this!’
Josie gulped. The thought of going to a hot sweaty club now, where you had to shout over the pounding music to make yourself heard and where everyone was fifteen years younger than her (and better groomed, and in sexier clothes), and where it cost a fiver for a single drink . . . Oh God! She really really didn’t want to go clubbing! But there was no way she could say that in front of the other two. No way! If Nell had the stamina to go on somewhere too, then Josie would just have to bite the bullet and join them.
She turned to Nell, trying to keep the desperation from her eyes.
‘Do you really want to?’ Nell asked Lisa. ‘Only . . . I was kind of wondering about getting some chocolate and having a cup of tea in our PJs back at yours, Lise. Like the good old days . . .’
‘Josie? How about you?’ Lisa asked.
Josie felt a wave of relief. ‘Chocolate and PJs have my vote too,’ she said apologetically, standing up to get her coat. ‘Sorry, Lise – is that really boring of us?’
‘No! Course not!’ Lisa said. The waiter came over and she handed him her credit card. ‘Put it all on
She was envious, she realized. She’d come here this weekend feeling as if she had the perfect life all wrapped up, but suddenly she was starting to doubt her conviction. There she’d been at lunchtime, worrying that her friends might think her smug, that they might covet her life, her husband and children. Now she wondered if they actually pitied her for taking the motherhood path while they’d flung themselves into adventures and professional triumphs instead.
She had nothing to contribute to this conversation, she thought helplessly, no adventures of her own to report. She couldn’t join in knowledgably when Lisa spoke about boardroom dramas. She couldn’t add anecdotes to Nell’s travelling stories. Her life had become so safe, so predictable, so boring in comparison! She’d been somebody’s wife, somebody’s mum for too long, lost her sparkly Josieness, lost her bottle . . .
She sipped her wine again. Still, it wasn’t too late to change things, was it? She didn’t have to spend the rest of her life like this. Now that the boys were older, maybe she and Pete could afford to be more impulsive, take a few risks? Maybe they could all go on an adventure together!
She grinned to herself. Yes. She’d suggest it. They should definitely break out of the safety chamber and go somewhere exciting before Rose was born. That way, next time she and her friends met up, she’d have tales of her own to tell again, wouldn’t she?
Chapter Four
‘Smile!’
Josie beamed into the camera and blinked in the flash that followed. She, Lisa and Nell were the only people left in the Italian restaurant now and their waiter had taken a break from pointedly sweeping up around their table to snap a photo of them with Nell’s camera.
‘Thanks. That’s one for the family album,’ Nell said, winking at him. ‘Could we have the bill, please?’
‘I’ll get this,’ Lisa said, skimming through a wedge of credit cards in a smart Mulberry wallet. ‘My treat.’
‘As if,’ Nell said, planting a twenty-pound note in the centre of the table. ‘We should be treating you, for being our hostess with the mostest tonight.’
Lisa batted away Nell’s money. ‘You two paid train fares to come to London,’ she countered. ‘So this can be my contribution.’
Besides, I’m loaded and this paltry bill is nothing to me , a nasty little voice added in Josie’s head. ‘Well, we’ll pay for the cab back,’ she said quickly, trying to shut out her uncharitable thoughts. ‘Won’t we, Nell?’
‘Cab back? We haven’t started yet,’ Lisa said in surprise. ‘I thought we were going clubbing after this!’
Josie gulped. The thought of going to a hot sweaty club now, where you had to shout over the pounding music to make yourself heard and where everyone was fifteen years younger than her (and better groomed, and in sexier clothes), and where it cost a fiver for a single drink . . . Oh God! She really really didn’t want to go clubbing! But there was no way she could say that in front of the other two. No way! If Nell had the stamina to go on somewhere too, then Josie would just have to bite the bullet and join them.
She turned to Nell, trying to keep the desperation from her eyes.
‘Do you really want to?’ Nell asked Lisa. ‘Only . . . I was kind of wondering about getting some chocolate and having a cup of tea in our PJs back at yours, Lise. Like the good old days . . .’
‘Josie? How about you?’ Lisa asked.
Josie felt a wave of relief. ‘Chocolate and PJs have my vote too,’ she said apologetically, standing up to get her coat. ‘Sorry, Lise – is that really boring of us?’
‘No! Course not!’ Lisa said. The waiter came over and she handed him her credit card. ‘Put it all on
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