Patience & Sarah (Little Sister's Classics) by Isabel Miller

distant waterfall or a conch shell held to the ear, and I think that faint roaring is the reason the dogs were so ungrateful. My father said nonsense, and my brother said nonsense, but I still think that was the reason.
    So I whispered enticing lies to my cows and enjoyed their sturdy warmth. Since Martha didn’t come out to do her milking, I went on and did it for her. I used to feel that I did her milking more often than not, but I must not have really, since her cows didn’t drip for me and did for her.
    When I took her milk to her, she was embarrassed but, if I may say so, I was very pleasant. “I was glad to do it,” I said, and smiled, and asked if there was any other way I might help her.
    “No, I’m managing. Edward says we’ll be losing you.”
    “Yes, if you want to call it a loss.”
    “I might just begin to.”
    “I can see now where I could have done better.”
    “I can see where you wouldn’t take the interest you would for your own,” she said.
    I thought it better not to explain that it was a different need unsatisfied that left me grudging. I wanted to, and I wanted to say I thought I understood how she could go down into the valley of pain and shadows and fear every year for Edward and his babies, now that I found someone I would do that for if need be. Nothing I wanted to say seemed advisable, so I just gave Martha a hug and smiled and went to my place and set myself to copying the map of York State.
    Around noon, Edward came to see me. He looked much as usual, very stern. He stomped around. My longing to tell my good news was a trial. To him I wanted to say, oh, Edward, I know where to get the joy that makes it easy to go on living: from kisses , Edward! But I’d learned at age four, from his shock when I tried to teach him how to get a wonderful feeling inside by moving in a certain way, that there are things one doesn’t tell Edward. So instead of recommending kisses for getting the heaviness out of his step and the downward trend out of his mouth, I smiled and said, “Good morning, Brother.”
    He said, “No, not very good. Sarah Dowling’s making it her brag that you’re her mate.”
    And after all my longing to make that brag myself, I felt my head burn in the mightiest blush of my life. My throat clamped shut and saved me from speaking while I waited for my surprise and dread to pass. The surprise did pass. I saw that I should have known Sarah would tell, being as tempted as I was, and innocent, and the most honest person in the world. But the dread remained and filled my mouth with dust. I seemed to hear all the neighbors, and all the village, wondering and mocking and scandalized, and my life made an example of. Outcast, I thought, and shut my teeth to bite back a groan.
    “Well?” Edward said.
    So I saw there was still a chance, at least with him. He was ready to consider that there had been a misunderstanding. Dear judicious Edward. I had no intention of testifying against myself. Our Constitution says we needn’t. But what would it profit Sarah and me to persuade Edward, if the village had heard or would hear?
    Nevertheless I had to try. We needed Edward’s help in order to leave.
    I succeeded in saying, “Partner, she must mean.”
    “No, something like wife she means.”
    I produced a tiny astonished laugh, in the hope of misleading him without having to tell an outright lie. “She couldn’t mean that. Who ever heard of such a thing?”
    “She’s bragging it. Her Pa was just here. Pretty riled up. And I don’t blame him. He wanted to see you. I said I’d take care of it.”
    “Take care of what? I’d be very glad to see him. And Sarah. To ask her what she could be thinking of. I think I’d better. Don’t you, really?”
    “I wouldn’t advise it. He said to keep you off his place. I said I would.”
    “I’m just bewildered. What could she be thinking of?”
    “She says the two of you are like man and woman.”
    “It’s so impossible.”
    “If it’s not