I’ve got to go," she said, standing up to gather her things.
"No, please don’t go. I didn’t mean to upset you, Mrs. Childers. I just need to know what you know. Please, have another drink with me. I promise I won’t push you."
She smiled at me.
It made my heart beat faster.
"Okay, but just one, then I really do have to go." Mrs. Childers reclaimed her seat and ordered. "Bring me another Hennessy Martini."
"With a twist," I said and smiled. And she smiled back. "So tell me about yourself. Your sister tells me y’all are from Philly. How’d you get to New York?"
"I wanted to get out of Philly." She let out a little giggle. "Had to really. Our parents were really tough on us. Never let us go anywhere, do anything. It was like being on lock down. One by one, they drove us all out of the house. When Jake graduated from high school, he just never came home that night. No one knew where he was or what happened to him, he was just gone. About six months later he came to my school to let me know that he was all right and that he was going to a small college in Pennsylvania. He told me where, and he made me promise that I wouldn’t tell our parents. Jake said they didn’t have a son anymore."
"Kinda cold."
"They deserved it. They’re dead to me now. Two years later, I left too. I hated to leave Chéz, but she was too young for me to try to take care of both of us. So I did what I had to, to get enough money to get up here."
"What did you have to do?"
"That doesn’t matter. I’m not proud of what happened. That was a long time ago. It’s in the past and that’s where it will stay."
"How’d you get hooked up with Chilly?"
"You really want to hear this, huh? — Okay. So I caught the first thing smokin’ and came here. When I got off the bus at Port Authority, Chilly was the first person I met. I was young, barely seventeen. I’d never been anywhere and he offered me the world. See my father was the type of guy who was always waitin’ on some big deal or another he was tryin’ to put together. But it never happened. He was always this close to movin’ us up out the projects and into a nice house in the suburbs. He hated livin’ in the projects. Said it wasn’t a safe place to rise the three of us. That’s why they were so hard on us. Especially me. He didn’t want me to get involved with the wrong kind of guys. Well look at me now daddy," she said and raised her glass. "Anyway, Chilly was different. If Chilly said he was gonna do something he got up and made it happen. I liked that. He was nice at first, then." Her eyes dropped into her drink. "That war started and changed everything. Power changed him. I was just his showpiece, his toy. Something to show off to his boyz. But that was all show. Then the beatings started."
"Why don’t you leave him? Get away, go somewhere, start a new life for yourself."
"Sure. Just like that."
"Leave New York.
"I have, a few times, but he always finds me. Brings me back," she said matter of factly. "Or he gives me a reason to come back."
"How does he do that?"
"He hurts the things that are important to me."
"Chésará and Jake."
"Once I thought it was over. I went to Kansas City. I didn’t tell anybody where I was going. I got a job as a teller in a bank. They were even talking about promoting me to customer service. You know, sit at a desk, open accounts, that kinda stuff. I had been there for six months when he found me. I told him I was happy and I wasn’t coming back. Usually he — yells, he grabs, shakes me, hits me. But I was ready for that. He was going to have to kill me. But he said okay and left. But it wasn’t over."
"I didn’t think so."
"The next day Chéz called me crying. She said Chilly brought Jake to her apartment and he had a gun to Jake’s head. He told her that if I didn’t say I was coming back right now, he was going to kill both of them while I listened. I said no. Then I heard the gun go off. Then Chéz screamed and said
"No, please don’t go. I didn’t mean to upset you, Mrs. Childers. I just need to know what you know. Please, have another drink with me. I promise I won’t push you."
She smiled at me.
It made my heart beat faster.
"Okay, but just one, then I really do have to go." Mrs. Childers reclaimed her seat and ordered. "Bring me another Hennessy Martini."
"With a twist," I said and smiled. And she smiled back. "So tell me about yourself. Your sister tells me y’all are from Philly. How’d you get to New York?"
"I wanted to get out of Philly." She let out a little giggle. "Had to really. Our parents were really tough on us. Never let us go anywhere, do anything. It was like being on lock down. One by one, they drove us all out of the house. When Jake graduated from high school, he just never came home that night. No one knew where he was or what happened to him, he was just gone. About six months later he came to my school to let me know that he was all right and that he was going to a small college in Pennsylvania. He told me where, and he made me promise that I wouldn’t tell our parents. Jake said they didn’t have a son anymore."
"Kinda cold."
"They deserved it. They’re dead to me now. Two years later, I left too. I hated to leave Chéz, but she was too young for me to try to take care of both of us. So I did what I had to, to get enough money to get up here."
"What did you have to do?"
"That doesn’t matter. I’m not proud of what happened. That was a long time ago. It’s in the past and that’s where it will stay."
"How’d you get hooked up with Chilly?"
"You really want to hear this, huh? — Okay. So I caught the first thing smokin’ and came here. When I got off the bus at Port Authority, Chilly was the first person I met. I was young, barely seventeen. I’d never been anywhere and he offered me the world. See my father was the type of guy who was always waitin’ on some big deal or another he was tryin’ to put together. But it never happened. He was always this close to movin’ us up out the projects and into a nice house in the suburbs. He hated livin’ in the projects. Said it wasn’t a safe place to rise the three of us. That’s why they were so hard on us. Especially me. He didn’t want me to get involved with the wrong kind of guys. Well look at me now daddy," she said and raised her glass. "Anyway, Chilly was different. If Chilly said he was gonna do something he got up and made it happen. I liked that. He was nice at first, then." Her eyes dropped into her drink. "That war started and changed everything. Power changed him. I was just his showpiece, his toy. Something to show off to his boyz. But that was all show. Then the beatings started."
"Why don’t you leave him? Get away, go somewhere, start a new life for yourself."
"Sure. Just like that."
"Leave New York.
"I have, a few times, but he always finds me. Brings me back," she said matter of factly. "Or he gives me a reason to come back."
"How does he do that?"
"He hurts the things that are important to me."
"Chésará and Jake."
"Once I thought it was over. I went to Kansas City. I didn’t tell anybody where I was going. I got a job as a teller in a bank. They were even talking about promoting me to customer service. You know, sit at a desk, open accounts, that kinda stuff. I had been there for six months when he found me. I told him I was happy and I wasn’t coming back. Usually he — yells, he grabs, shakes me, hits me. But I was ready for that. He was going to have to kill me. But he said okay and left. But it wasn’t over."
"I didn’t think so."
"The next day Chéz called me crying. She said Chilly brought Jake to her apartment and he had a gun to Jake’s head. He told her that if I didn’t say I was coming back right now, he was going to kill both of them while I listened. I said no. Then I heard the gun go off. Then Chéz screamed and said
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