conference,” whispered Edgar as he pulled Ellen aside. “I want those fire ants. Maybe we can trade him!”
Ellen twisted Edgar’s ear. “Oh, I know you, Brother. You’d have lots of ideas for what
we
could do with nasty, biting fire ants, but at the first chance you’d dump them under
my
bedcovers! Well, I’ll have none of that.”
With one last twist, Ellen let go of her brother’s ear and turned back to Von Barlow.
“Maybe we have exactly what you need, Doctor.”
His face lit up. “Oh yes, you very well may! I just can’t believe all the fabulous animals you have here! This may be the greatest day of my career!”
Edgar and Ellen smirked and kicked at each other.
“So you might be interested in some of our rare, exotic creatures?” Ellen asked.
“Interested?” the zoologist replied. “Why I’m downright
obsessed
with these fantastic creatures! Just
look
at them! I’ve seen all kinds of beasts, but I have never, I repeat,
never,
come across anything like these! All new species! Never seen before! However did you get them? Oh, never mind how you got them! They’re incredible!”
“They are?” said Edgar.
“Of course they are! These animals will make me famous! The board of directors will erect a huge new building at the zoo! The Von Barlow Hall of Rare and Exotic Species! Zoologists from all over the world will come to see them, and they’ll say ‘That Von Barlow, he’s the best there is!’ ‘Von Barlow Is Our Hero,’ I can see the headlines now! I’ll be promoted to Executive Zookeeper, awarded honorary degrees and titles….”
He could barely contain himself, giggling and dancing and skipping in front of the cart.
“Well, Dr. Von Barlow, which of our amazing species would you like?” asked Ellen, eager to finally make her first sale.
“Which?” retorted the zoologist. “
Which?
Why, I don’t want some of these creatures, I want all of them!”
“You want…
all of them
?” the twins repeated.
“Every last one!” boomed Von Barlow, picking
up a dazed Fuddleflinger and giving it a great big hug. But as he swung the Fuddleflinger about, the muzzle on its snout loosened and fell off, and everyone froze as it let out a halfhearted “Woof.”
“Oh, my!” said the zoologist, “That sounded…just like….”
Edgar and Ellen glanced at each other. All their hard work would be for naught if Dr. Von Barlow figured out that the Fuddleflinger was just a beagle puppy in disguise.
The zoologist stammered, “Just like…like a…
Troeuilompe!
That’s it! Have you ever heard of one? I always have a hard time with French pronunciation. I was fortunate enough to receive a recording of its wild call through my membership in the Animal-of-the-Month Club. I wonder if the Fuddleflinger species is related.”
He laughed and playfully woofed along with the animal.
Relieved, Edgar displayed his happiest expression, which, coincidentally, was also his creepiest. Things were going well.
Ellen sauntered down the side of the cart, adding up the value of each exotic animal.
“Well, Dr. Von Barlow,” she said, “we have a greatmany rare beasts here, and you know that
rare
means
valuable
. But since you’re willing to keep the collection together—and we’ll miss them so, the adorable little things—I’m sure we can make some concessions.”
She scratched her chin, pulled on her pigtails, and said “hmm” a lot as she mulled things over.
“I’m sure you’ll agree, Doctor, that for all of these magnificent creatures, a nice round figure of twenty-five thousand dollars is a generous selling price.”
The Fuddleflinger yelped as Dr. Von Barlow dropped it to the ground.
“
Sell? Twenty-five thousand dollars?
Oh, no, my dear! No, no,
no
! I’m afraid you just don’t understand! Nod’s Limbs Zoo is a public zoo. You don’t
sell
animals to us, you
donate
them!”
“Donate?!”
howled Edgar. “You mean, give them to you for
no money
? Why would we want to do
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