and Jace to let them know we’d be back. I was grateful that, instead of standing to follow, Jace simply nodded and smiled.
Once we’d reached the hallway, mom threaded her arm through mine. “I’m guessing this is about that handsome man you have in there,” she said, leaning in to whisper low enough that the guys couldn’t hear.
“How’d you know?” I asked, a little nervous that she was already aware of my conversation topic; her already knowing meant that she’d already formed an opinion.
Mom chuckled and patted my arm. “Oh, honey. It’s not hard to know love when you see it.”
I gulped. She knew even more than I’d realized. “Love?” I asked, my voice cracking.
“Well, don’t you?” she asked, directing me around the corner toward the cafeteria. “Because he is certainly in love with you.”
“How do you know?” I knew she was right, but I still had to ask.
“You can’t deny when love is there,” she said, the crinkles around her eyes deepening as she smiled. “The way that man looks at you. The way he watches you when you cross the room, how he listens to everything you say. He’s got it bad, baby.”
“You really think so?”
“I know so,” she said, coming to a stop in the middle of the hallway. She placed her hands on my shoulders, her brow creasing with concern as she studied me carefully. “The real question is, do you love him?”
I chewed at the inside of my cheek. I already knew my answer; I’d told him so, but there was still something that I couldn’t put my finger on—worry, dread, fear—something that was making me doubt the words I’d professed just an hour before. Words that seemed silly to say to my mother, a woman who had worked tirelessly for the marriage she had with my father, the love that they shared.
“Honey, if you’re not sure, you need to tell the man,” my mother said, still holding me in place.
“I told him I love him, and I meant it,” I finally said. “But I’m afraid.”
“Oh, baby, that’s the best kind of love. It’s the same love I had for your father, still have, really. And you, and your brothers. That’s the kind of love that you know, if something were to happen to that person, your heart could stop beating because it depends on them to keep going. It’s crazy and wild and it has no real rhyme or reason. It’s scary, yes, but it’s also very, very strong.”
“But I never had that with Sean,” I said, voice cracking. “Does that mean I loved him less? And isn’t it silly to feel this way after being with Jace such a short time?”
“No, baby. You didn’t love Sean less. It was just a different kind of love, one that maybe wasn’t the right kind, the kind that weathers through the storm,” my mother said, pulling me in for a hug. That was about the time the tears started, about the time that I thought my heart might break because she was right, and I knew it. I’d wanted to love Sean that way, but the truth was, I hadn’t. “And no, it’s not silly at all. I knew I loved your father from the very first time he held my hand. That love only grew from there.”
“Really?” I asked, pulling back to look at her face. I hadn’t heard this part of the story before.
She nodded and wiped the tears from my eyes. “Really. That man, he was the spontaneity to my rigid, the humor to my seriousness. He was my exact opposite, but he balanced me out. I needed some of what he had in my life. And I have a feeling that Jace is that way for you. He’s your balance.”
“Then what do I do? How do I stop worrying so much?”
My mother’s lips pulled tight in a sad frown. “You don’t. You just have to trust, and that’s not easy for women like us sometimes. We want tangible. We want facts. But love, baby, that doesn’t come with any of those things. The heart wants what it wants and it’s as simple as that.”
***
I wasn’t sure if I felt better or worse after my talk with my mother, but as I walked into the
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