as though the air there might not be as thin.
She heaved a deep breath. “I can’t do this.” She knew her eyes were wide with fear.
Evan sat back on his heels and set his hands on his knees. “It’s okay,” he murmured, smiling at her.
“No. Really. It’s not.” She shook her head, gripped the arms of the chair so tight her fingers ached.
“I didn’t mean to pressure you.” He stood and took a step back. “I’m sorry.”
“No. I’m sorry. Sorry Fate dragged you into my nightmare. This isn’t fair to you. You should go. Find a woman who will make a better mate. Someone whole. Someone not damaged.” She fought the tears that welled up in the corners of her eyes. Do not cry.
“Oh, baby, you are so much more than damaged and unwhole. You just need more time to work through years of abuse.” He rubbed his neck as he spoke, clearly uncomfortable.
She shook her head. “Please, just go. I’m not ready for this. It’s too overwhelming. I can’t face mating anyone. It’s not on my long list of things to do and that list is very long. Please. Let it be. I understand it’ll be hard, but the less time we spend together, the easier it will be to separate. Find another mate. Claim someone else and forget about me.” She ducked her head, letting her hair fall around her face, hoping it would hide her feelings, her emotions, her…self.
Evan stood and backed away. She didn’t look up, but she sensed his distance as it grew with each step. It hurt. Her chest felt like it was being crushed by weights. Each step he took increased the pressure. You told him to go. Insisted .
She breathed shallowly, not wanting to miss a moment of his presence. She’d never feel again in her life what she’d felt for the two minutes she’d stared into his eyes. His scent would linger in the room, but it would dissipate over time.
She needed to hold strong. She was no good for him. He was a nice man. He deserved better than what she could ever offer under the best of scenarios.
The door to the basement snicked shut as he disappeared at the top of the steps. She jumped in her seat, lifted her face. He was gone. She sucked in a lungful of oxygen and let the tears fall down her face. A sob escaped.
It was for the best. She knew that. But it still hurt. And the pain would linger for a long time.
Chapter Nine
T wo months later…
“ Evan? Where are you? I’ve been trying to reach you forever.” Josh sounded rushed and frantic through the phone. Was something wrong with Ashley?
“I had to leave town to follow a lead.”
“Just like that? I thought you weren’t traveling anymore. You left without a word. You’ve been gone for weeks.”
“Listen, Josh. It was too hard. I couldn’t stay in St. Louis. It’s a big city, but not big enough for both Ashley and I to occupy if we’re to deny our mating.” He’d grown to agree with her, strengthening his resolve each day. She was right. It would be impossible to try and make something work between them. There were other fish in the sea. He’d find one…eventually.
Josh took a deep breath. “You don’t seriously believe you can walk away, do you?”
“She gave me no choice.”
“She’s confused,” Josh shouted. “And this isn’t helping. Now she’s worse.”
Evan sank down onto the mattress of his hotel room, his shoulders slumping. He didn’t need to hear all that.
“Please, come home. Come over and we can talk. She needs you, even if she won’t admit it.”
“I can’t right now. I’m in the middle of a case.” Never mind he was chasing his tail trying to locate Damon Parkfield. And never mind every lead he followed up on led to nowhere. Whatever that bastard was up to, Evan grew more impatient with each passing day.
If he couldn’t be with Ashley, the least he could do was spend his days seeking justice on her behalf.
“Why do I think there’s something you aren’t telling me?”
Evan squeezed his eyes shut. Because there are lots of
She heaved a deep breath. “I can’t do this.” She knew her eyes were wide with fear.
Evan sat back on his heels and set his hands on his knees. “It’s okay,” he murmured, smiling at her.
“No. Really. It’s not.” She shook her head, gripped the arms of the chair so tight her fingers ached.
“I didn’t mean to pressure you.” He stood and took a step back. “I’m sorry.”
“No. I’m sorry. Sorry Fate dragged you into my nightmare. This isn’t fair to you. You should go. Find a woman who will make a better mate. Someone whole. Someone not damaged.” She fought the tears that welled up in the corners of her eyes. Do not cry.
“Oh, baby, you are so much more than damaged and unwhole. You just need more time to work through years of abuse.” He rubbed his neck as he spoke, clearly uncomfortable.
She shook her head. “Please, just go. I’m not ready for this. It’s too overwhelming. I can’t face mating anyone. It’s not on my long list of things to do and that list is very long. Please. Let it be. I understand it’ll be hard, but the less time we spend together, the easier it will be to separate. Find another mate. Claim someone else and forget about me.” She ducked her head, letting her hair fall around her face, hoping it would hide her feelings, her emotions, her…self.
Evan stood and backed away. She didn’t look up, but she sensed his distance as it grew with each step. It hurt. Her chest felt like it was being crushed by weights. Each step he took increased the pressure. You told him to go. Insisted .
She breathed shallowly, not wanting to miss a moment of his presence. She’d never feel again in her life what she’d felt for the two minutes she’d stared into his eyes. His scent would linger in the room, but it would dissipate over time.
She needed to hold strong. She was no good for him. He was a nice man. He deserved better than what she could ever offer under the best of scenarios.
The door to the basement snicked shut as he disappeared at the top of the steps. She jumped in her seat, lifted her face. He was gone. She sucked in a lungful of oxygen and let the tears fall down her face. A sob escaped.
It was for the best. She knew that. But it still hurt. And the pain would linger for a long time.
Chapter Nine
T wo months later…
“ Evan? Where are you? I’ve been trying to reach you forever.” Josh sounded rushed and frantic through the phone. Was something wrong with Ashley?
“I had to leave town to follow a lead.”
“Just like that? I thought you weren’t traveling anymore. You left without a word. You’ve been gone for weeks.”
“Listen, Josh. It was too hard. I couldn’t stay in St. Louis. It’s a big city, but not big enough for both Ashley and I to occupy if we’re to deny our mating.” He’d grown to agree with her, strengthening his resolve each day. She was right. It would be impossible to try and make something work between them. There were other fish in the sea. He’d find one…eventually.
Josh took a deep breath. “You don’t seriously believe you can walk away, do you?”
“She gave me no choice.”
“She’s confused,” Josh shouted. “And this isn’t helping. Now she’s worse.”
Evan sank down onto the mattress of his hotel room, his shoulders slumping. He didn’t need to hear all that.
“Please, come home. Come over and we can talk. She needs you, even if she won’t admit it.”
“I can’t right now. I’m in the middle of a case.” Never mind he was chasing his tail trying to locate Damon Parkfield. And never mind every lead he followed up on led to nowhere. Whatever that bastard was up to, Evan grew more impatient with each passing day.
If he couldn’t be with Ashley, the least he could do was spend his days seeking justice on her behalf.
“Why do I think there’s something you aren’t telling me?”
Evan squeezed his eyes shut. Because there are lots of
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