RockMySenses by Lisa Carlisle

“Start from the beginning, Nike, and
tell me everything.”
    “I don’t know if you’ll understand it. It was an
overwhelming compulsion to be with this woman.”
    “Of course I understand.” He squeezed my hand and then
turned to face me. “Sexually?”
    “Yes.” I nodded, averting my eyes to focus on a crack in the
sidewalk. “And drink from her.”
    Michel ran his hand over his stubble. “You felt a thirst.”
    It didn’t sound like a question, but I answered. “It was
awful. I couldn’t control it. My teeth became fangs again and—” Taking a deep
breath, I admitted, “I bit her.”
    “Nike.” He blinked and kept his eyes closed for an agonizing
second.
    I’m not sure he knew what else to say. Ever since I’d been
bitten by one of Michel’s enemies, I’d experienced symptoms. Sunlight bothered
me, but it didn’t burn me like it did him. It wouldn’t kill me.
    Michel had bitten many humans in his long history as a
vampire, but as far as he knew, they didn’t experience the symptoms I had. He’d
never brought anyone over. Since I hadn’t been drained of blood and forced to
drink any of his enemy’s blood, I wasn’t converted. I remained human as far as
we could discern. So why did I have these symptoms? Ones that had come on
quickly then abated, but were now growing in intensity again.
    We’d traveled much of Europe after I’d been bitten, to keep
me from hurting loved ones and to search for answers, which we did not find. My
reaction was uncommon. Some even suggested it was all in my head as a way to
identify with Michel.
    That didn’t explain how I’d grown fangs.
    Jackasses.
    “Did you drain her?” he asked.
    “No!” I replied. “I didn’t kill her.”
    “So you were able to control your thirst?” He appeared
relieved.
    “Um, not exactly.” The guilt returned.
    Michel furrowed his brows, waiting for me to elaborate.
    “Danton stopped me,” I said.
    “The gargoyle?” His eyes widened.
    “Yes.”
    “Ah,” He nodded. “He’s taken on shifts as a bouncer at Vamps
in human form. Mostly to protect Tracy, I think.”
    “Well, he protected another woman too. From me.” I pointed
at my chest. “ I’m the threat. A gargoyle you brought here had to
protect someone from me.” I slumped my shoulders. “Can you believe it? Me ?”
    “Nike, the thirst is difficult to control, but not
impossible. You’ll learn to manage it.”
    “But I’m not a vampire. Not like you, at least.” I threw my
hands up. “What the fuck am I?”
    “A wonderful woman whom I love and will do anything to
protect.”
    “I’m turning into a monster.” The thirst started as a tickle
in the back of my throat months ago, but grew stronger with time.
    “Never,” he said. “Don’t ever think that.”
    “It’s true,” I said, grabbing a lock of my hair and twisting
it around my finger. “If Danton didn’t stop me, I don’t know what would have
happened.”
    “You would have quenched the thirst and stopped.”
    I gave him a flat stare. “I could have killed her.”
    “You wouldn’t have.” He ran his fingers through my auburn
hair, watching it fall through his fingers. “I know you would have found a way
to stop.”
    Unconvinced, I shook my head. “I kissed her too. And touched
her. Everywhere.”
    “The desire for sex and blood is so close for vampires,
they’re almost intertwined. It’s difficult to have one without craving the
other.”
    “You’ve never bitten me.”
    His eyes took on a faraway gaze. “I’ve wanted to. So badly.”
    I raised my hands and dropped them. “Why don’t you? What
does it matter at this point? I’m already tainted.”
    “Don’t talk like that, Nike. You will always be pure and
wholesome to me. Whatever is going on, we’ll figure it out.”
    God, I loved him. His endless love and devotion was
something I never thought I’d find. I shook my head. “We’ve searched so long
already and found nothing. I’m afraid the only answer is I’m some