Wheel of Fortune, it’s The New Price Is Right or Sale of the Century. They have absolutely no idea what the questions asked are, but they are excited by the process and the colored lights and the money symbols flashing up at different intervals.
Then there’s the news. The 5:00 p.m. news on Channel Ten (a difficult time for them because it clashes with The New Price Is Right ), the 6:00 p.m. news on Channel Nine, the 7:00 p.m. national news, the Italian news on the Italian radio station, and if I stay awake long enough I get to watch the 10:30 p.m. Lateline on Public Broadcasting. It’s a very frustrating process because they get most of it wrong. Nonno Salvo calls out obscenities at the man whose image appears behind the newscaster’s head as she tells us the top story of the night. Nonno explains to me that the bastard pictured is a war criminal who is responsible for the deaths of a village of men in Bosnia. In actual fact, it’s Rupert Murdoch, but I don’t try to explain.
Tonight, we watch a cop show where someone gets shot dead. Nonno Salvo reassures me that the person’s not really dead. It’s just an actor. Then my nonna tells him that of course I know that.
“She has the mouth of a viper,” he tells me, twisting his bottom lip with his finger to further illustrate the point.
Ever since I can remember, my nonno and nonna have had these arguments. This one lasts a whole twenty-two minutes. It has to end because Who Wants to Be a Millionaire is just about to start and no talking is allowed during that. But I suppose they love each other to death. Every year at my nonna’s annual surprise birthday party, where she pretends she has no idea that we’re all huddled inside her kitchen, although the fifteen cars parked outside would be a certain giveaway, we go berserk when photos are taken and Nonno tries to kiss her and she acts coy. When he gets to lock lips for more than ten seconds, we scream with delight. And I always look at my mum and dad, his arms around her from behind, leaning his chin on her head, and it makes me feel very lucky.
Later, Nonna Anna tucks me into bed and smothers my forehead with kisses before she starts putting the clothes I’ve thrown around onto coat hangers. She’s in seventh heaven. Stealing one of Mia’s children away from her is like a dream come true. My dad stopped belonging to her when my mum came along. I think my father tends to forget anyone else is around when Mia enters the room. My grandmother’s disapproval of the way Mia runs the household is very vocal. I shouldn’t walk around naked in front of my brother, for example, and nor should my mother. Once in a while my father will make the trip from the bathroom to his bedroom naked, and I can’t say it’s an attractive picture, but it hasn’t traumatized me. It’s unnatural, my nonna Anna will say. Why can’t we be self-conscious like normal people? she asks.
I’ve never really been embarrassed by much. I just couldn’t be bothered doing things, that’s all, an aspect of me that Mia can’t cope with. Sometimes I think I do it even more just so she won’t win. At this moment, though, I’m willing to give in. To do anything to make her better.
Nonna Anna gives me one more kiss and turns off my bed lamp.
“Tutto a posto,” she says, shutting the closet door. Everything in its place.
But my family is split into three, and no one is in their place.
chapter 8
I LOOK FOR Luca at lunchtime to see how he’s coping at my aunt’s place. He’s looking miserable by the cafeteria, and when he sees me, his little face lights up, which makes me want to cry.
“Are you having fun?” I ask over-cheerfully.
“Mummy’s having a nervous breakdown,” he says, and I can tell he has no idea what it is.
“Have you got your lunch?” I ask, fixing up his tie and socks because the administration around here are Nazis about such things.
“That’s what Anthony says has happened to Mummy.”
“Doesn’t
Then there’s the news. The 5:00 p.m. news on Channel Ten (a difficult time for them because it clashes with The New Price Is Right ), the 6:00 p.m. news on Channel Nine, the 7:00 p.m. national news, the Italian news on the Italian radio station, and if I stay awake long enough I get to watch the 10:30 p.m. Lateline on Public Broadcasting. It’s a very frustrating process because they get most of it wrong. Nonno Salvo calls out obscenities at the man whose image appears behind the newscaster’s head as she tells us the top story of the night. Nonno explains to me that the bastard pictured is a war criminal who is responsible for the deaths of a village of men in Bosnia. In actual fact, it’s Rupert Murdoch, but I don’t try to explain.
Tonight, we watch a cop show where someone gets shot dead. Nonno Salvo reassures me that the person’s not really dead. It’s just an actor. Then my nonna tells him that of course I know that.
“She has the mouth of a viper,” he tells me, twisting his bottom lip with his finger to further illustrate the point.
Ever since I can remember, my nonno and nonna have had these arguments. This one lasts a whole twenty-two minutes. It has to end because Who Wants to Be a Millionaire is just about to start and no talking is allowed during that. But I suppose they love each other to death. Every year at my nonna’s annual surprise birthday party, where she pretends she has no idea that we’re all huddled inside her kitchen, although the fifteen cars parked outside would be a certain giveaway, we go berserk when photos are taken and Nonno tries to kiss her and she acts coy. When he gets to lock lips for more than ten seconds, we scream with delight. And I always look at my mum and dad, his arms around her from behind, leaning his chin on her head, and it makes me feel very lucky.
Later, Nonna Anna tucks me into bed and smothers my forehead with kisses before she starts putting the clothes I’ve thrown around onto coat hangers. She’s in seventh heaven. Stealing one of Mia’s children away from her is like a dream come true. My dad stopped belonging to her when my mum came along. I think my father tends to forget anyone else is around when Mia enters the room. My grandmother’s disapproval of the way Mia runs the household is very vocal. I shouldn’t walk around naked in front of my brother, for example, and nor should my mother. Once in a while my father will make the trip from the bathroom to his bedroom naked, and I can’t say it’s an attractive picture, but it hasn’t traumatized me. It’s unnatural, my nonna Anna will say. Why can’t we be self-conscious like normal people? she asks.
I’ve never really been embarrassed by much. I just couldn’t be bothered doing things, that’s all, an aspect of me that Mia can’t cope with. Sometimes I think I do it even more just so she won’t win. At this moment, though, I’m willing to give in. To do anything to make her better.
Nonna Anna gives me one more kiss and turns off my bed lamp.
“Tutto a posto,” she says, shutting the closet door. Everything in its place.
But my family is split into three, and no one is in their place.
chapter 8
I LOOK FOR Luca at lunchtime to see how he’s coping at my aunt’s place. He’s looking miserable by the cafeteria, and when he sees me, his little face lights up, which makes me want to cry.
“Are you having fun?” I ask over-cheerfully.
“Mummy’s having a nervous breakdown,” he says, and I can tell he has no idea what it is.
“Have you got your lunch?” I ask, fixing up his tie and socks because the administration around here are Nazis about such things.
“That’s what Anthony says has happened to Mummy.”
“Doesn’t
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