Season of Blessing by Beverly LaHaye Page A

trying to be Mark’s father, but Mark doesn’t appreciate it much. He’s having trouble adjusting to coming home to a different family, and all of a sudden having to do what Steve says. I’m in the middle, you know, like I’m being torn in two.”
    â€œNobody said it was going to be easy.” Sylvia set her fork down. “Marriage never is. And a blended family is a lot harder than a normal marriage.”
    â€œTell me about it.” Cathy took a bite, shaking her head. “The thing is, Steve expects me to make my kids act just the way he wants them to, but then he overlooks the things that Tracy does. Don’t get me wrong, she’s not bad. But occasionally he needs to call her down, or punish her even. But he doesn’t even notice it. It goes right past him. Yet he notices everything my kids do. He knows how Mark has changed and he knows what a struggle he’s going through since he got out of jail. He knows that Mark is trying to decide exactly where he fits back into this world. It’s not easy for him. But he just doesn’t seem to understand that I need to give Mark a little more time. And he got his feelings hurt last night when I asked him to go a little easier. I don’t know why it has to be so hard. Why can’t we just love each other’s kids the same?”
    â€œBecause you’re not really Tracy’s mother and he’s not really your kids’ father.”
    Cathy studied her potato. “I wish there was some magic key to having a happy second marriage, but if there is, I don’t know what it is.”
    â€œOh, there is one.” Sylvia dug into her salad. “It’s the same key to having a successful first marriage.”
    Cathy set her fork down and leaned back. “Okay, hit me with it.”
    Sylvia smiled. “It’s easy. Die to yourself.”
    Cathy’s eyes narrowed. “Die to myself?”
    â€œThat’s right. Die to yourself. As soon as you and Steve each figure that out, your marriage will be a success.”
    â€œWell, what does that mean?” Cathy asked. “How do you die to yourself?”
    â€œYou decide that the other person’s needs are more important than your own. If there’s ever a question between your doing what you want and your doing what he wants, you do what he wants.”
    â€œWait a minute. That doesn’t sound like happiness. It just sounds like a lot of sacrifice.”
    â€œWell, sure, it’s sacrifice. That’s what marriage is about.”
    Cathy opened a pack of butter and dropped the square onto her plate.
    â€œAll right, sacrifice, maybe. But it’s not supposed to be martyrdom. I mean, how far do you go in fulfilling his needs? Do you not eat or sleep or buy anything for yourself?”
    Sylvia dabbed at her mouth with her napkin. “Cathy, you know better than that. I’m not talking about lying down like a doormat and inviting him to walk all over you. The fact is, you married a man who is not going to do that anyway. But he is the head of your household, biblically speaking, and when there’s a question of your will against his will, you need to let him win.”
    â€œWhat if he’s wrong?”
    â€œWell, you pray for him every day,” Sylvia said. “You pray that God will guide him, that he’ll have a heart that’s fertile and teachable, and that he’ll listen to God’s prompting.”
    Cathy crossed her arms and tipped her head. “That didn’t answer my question. I asked you what if he’s wrong? How do I submit to him…” Her voice was rising, and she looked around, wondering if anyone had heard. Quickly, she lowered it. “How do I submit to him if he’s flat wrong?”
    â€œEasy.” Sylvia took a drink of her iced tea and brought her eyes back to Cathy. “Watch Brenda. She’s been submitting to David for years, and he’s often wrong. Most of