Slow Sex: The Path to Fulfilling and Sustainable Sexuality by Diana Richardson Page B

scratch the vagina or penis) makes a two-pronged fork with the first two fingers of both hands. Place one finger fork (try the left hand) firmly at the base of the penis and hold the fingers there to stabilize the penis. Place the forked fingers of the other hand (the right) directly on either side and behind the rim encircling the head of the penis. Squeeze the fingers together so that you have a gentle, yet firm grip on the penis. And then pull the penis toward your vagina. When the head arrives at the entrance of the vagina you can push it a little way into the vagina. Pull the fingers back a little, then take another gentle grip on the penis, and walk or feed the penis even farther into the vagina. And then repeat the walking or feeding movement until you have pushed the whole length of the penis into you. Naturally, to do the insertion in one smooth, seamless move will take practice, so at first you may manage to get only the head, or a couple of inches, inside you. This is an excellent start and in time, when you get the knack of putting a relaxed penis into your vagina, doing so becomes second nature.

    Fig. 4.8. Woman’s finger position holding penis for soft insertion
     
    It is important to note that woman must keep her vagina relaxed and wide as she inserts the penis. Often her head is raised to look between the legs at what her hands are doing, but this move of the head tightens the abdominal muscles and the vagina. Once the fingers are in position, then woman should lie back and relax before she begins to insert the penis. When the insertion is complete and genitals are connected, wrap your legs around each other and bring your pelvises firmly together.
    Bringing the bodies together in this limited-excitement way opens up all kinds of other possibilities during the sexual exchange. Just leave it up to the genitals, supported by your consciousness, and they will know how to communicate in a way that may even surprise you. It is important not to expect anything like what you have known before, and to share in words what you are feeling within. For instance, when a man hears from his partner that she can feel energy radiating from his soft relaxed penis, that is a great relief to him. Discovering that the penis has certain qualities, even if he himself cannot feel them, is very reassuring and relaxing. And instead of worrying about erection and performance, he can relax the anus and buttocks and fall back into his body and pelvis to become aware of himself from the inside out.
    SPONTANEOUS ERECTION
     
    The possibility of spontaneous erection through magnetic intelligence is built in to the genitals. The opposite forces have an effect on each other, and the penis has the capacity to wind up inside the vagina in a snakelike coiling, probing way, without any stimulation or excitement. A spontaneous erection is a by-product of the magnetic attraction and requires no effort—it happens. You can’t expect a spontaneous erection, because it’s spontaneous. It transpires when there is a constellation of invisible factors, such as when a man and woman are innocently in their bodies and merged with the inner cellular experience. Spontaneous erection is more likely when love is in the air, or where there is an element of polarization in the field, such as when man anchors his awareness in the root of the penis, the perineum, and woman connects internally with her vagina, widening and receiving.
    Man will easily be able to feel the difference between spontaneous erection and intentional erection. One will feel inwardly potent and does not need movement or stimulation to maintain, while the other will feel more hollow and disconnected from the inside and is easily lost.
    QUALITY IS BASED ON SLOWNESS ARISING FROM CONSCIOUSNESS
     
    In exploring the vagina, you can again and again ask yourself a relative question: How slow is slow? It can become like a Zen koan. The answer depends on how conscious and aware you are willing to