with such a personal thing…I
was truly touched and I didn’t want to ruin the moment.
Nor did I want to stretch it out too long.
“It’s gonna happen, sweetie,” I said with a confidence I
definitely felt. “It just takes time and that has nothing—
nothing —to do with anything resembling failure on your
part. Nina would slap you for even thinking such a thing
and you know it.” at made the corner of his mouth
twitch up. Nina was a little spitfire and she’d have his ass in
a sling if she knew he was taking on full responsibility for
conception. “When it’s ready to happen, when it’s
supposed to happen, it will. You have to believe that.”
“You really think so?”
“Absolutely. And in the meantime, stop bitching about
the pressure and just relax and enjoy the multitude of
opportunities to fuck your wife silly.”
at time, he sputtered, sending beer spittle across the
bar and making me grin. Just as he could mess me up by
using raunchy guy talk with me, I could do the same to
him. I handed him a couple napkins.
46
Starting From Scratch
“Slob.”
47
CHAPTER FIVE
I sucked so furiously on the straw in my water bottle
that I was surprised my entire skull didn't cave in. It was
the following ursday, the day before the long Memorial
Day weekend and the air was chilly. I didn’t know if the
kids were tired from their week, too cold to play, anxious
about maybe taking a family trip for the holiday weekend,
or just trying to make me pull my hair out. Whatever it
was, they were driving me mad with their lack of attention
and focus and I was trying hard not to blow a gasket in
front of the four parents who occupied the bleachers that
day. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out how moms and
dads did this every single day of their lives.
I had them set up in fielding positions, but Jordan was
sitting on his butt just behind second base, and Katie kept
wandering away from third to get a sip from her bottle of
juice that sat next to the bleachers. After her fourth
abandonment of her post, I gave up.
“All right. Bring it in,” I called, waving them toward
me at the pitcher’s mound. “Grab a seat.” When they were
all parked on their little rear ends in a horseshoe around
me, I studied them. I was hoping my hands on my hips,
coupled with my expression of quiet disapproval would
resonate and make it clear to them that I wasn’t happy
with this practice session, but a couple of their gazes began
Georgia Beers
to wander and I sighed. ey’re five and six, I had to remind
myself. ey probably don’t get body language yet. I’d have to
spell it out while reminding myself to stay positive.
“Our first official game is next Saturday,” I told them.
ey murmured and actually sounded excited about it,
which brought a little grin to my lips.
“But we’ve still got some work to do before we’re as
ready as we can be.” A couple grimaces told me how they
felt about that. “You didn’t concentrate today as much as I
would have liked. I know there’s a long weekend coming
up and you’re probably excited, but we have one more
practice, on Tuesday, and I want you to come ready to play,
okay? No fooling around.” I noticed Mikey smiling and
waving at a car that had pulled up. “Mikey? What did I
just say?”
He looked at me blankly, and pursed his lips. “Um.”
en he studied the grass.
“at’s what I thought. Max, would you tell Mikey
what I just said?”
Max sat up a little straighter, as if he’d just been given
a big responsibility. “Coach King said we have to come
here on Tuesday and contrate. No fooling around.” He
smiled at me and I couldn’t help but smile back in return,
he was so cute.
“Exactly. Got it?”
“Yeah,” Mikey said quietly, looking sheepish.
“Everybody? Got it?” I looked around at the rest of the
team as they nodded. “Good. Okay, grab me the bases and
then go. Have a
was truly touched and I didn’t want to ruin the moment.
Nor did I want to stretch it out too long.
“It’s gonna happen, sweetie,” I said with a confidence I
definitely felt. “It just takes time and that has nothing—
nothing —to do with anything resembling failure on your
part. Nina would slap you for even thinking such a thing
and you know it.” at made the corner of his mouth
twitch up. Nina was a little spitfire and she’d have his ass in
a sling if she knew he was taking on full responsibility for
conception. “When it’s ready to happen, when it’s
supposed to happen, it will. You have to believe that.”
“You really think so?”
“Absolutely. And in the meantime, stop bitching about
the pressure and just relax and enjoy the multitude of
opportunities to fuck your wife silly.”
at time, he sputtered, sending beer spittle across the
bar and making me grin. Just as he could mess me up by
using raunchy guy talk with me, I could do the same to
him. I handed him a couple napkins.
46
Starting From Scratch
“Slob.”
47
CHAPTER FIVE
I sucked so furiously on the straw in my water bottle
that I was surprised my entire skull didn't cave in. It was
the following ursday, the day before the long Memorial
Day weekend and the air was chilly. I didn’t know if the
kids were tired from their week, too cold to play, anxious
about maybe taking a family trip for the holiday weekend,
or just trying to make me pull my hair out. Whatever it
was, they were driving me mad with their lack of attention
and focus and I was trying hard not to blow a gasket in
front of the four parents who occupied the bleachers that
day. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out how moms and
dads did this every single day of their lives.
I had them set up in fielding positions, but Jordan was
sitting on his butt just behind second base, and Katie kept
wandering away from third to get a sip from her bottle of
juice that sat next to the bleachers. After her fourth
abandonment of her post, I gave up.
“All right. Bring it in,” I called, waving them toward
me at the pitcher’s mound. “Grab a seat.” When they were
all parked on their little rear ends in a horseshoe around
me, I studied them. I was hoping my hands on my hips,
coupled with my expression of quiet disapproval would
resonate and make it clear to them that I wasn’t happy
with this practice session, but a couple of their gazes began
Georgia Beers
to wander and I sighed. ey’re five and six, I had to remind
myself. ey probably don’t get body language yet. I’d have to
spell it out while reminding myself to stay positive.
“Our first official game is next Saturday,” I told them.
ey murmured and actually sounded excited about it,
which brought a little grin to my lips.
“But we’ve still got some work to do before we’re as
ready as we can be.” A couple grimaces told me how they
felt about that. “You didn’t concentrate today as much as I
would have liked. I know there’s a long weekend coming
up and you’re probably excited, but we have one more
practice, on Tuesday, and I want you to come ready to play,
okay? No fooling around.” I noticed Mikey smiling and
waving at a car that had pulled up. “Mikey? What did I
just say?”
He looked at me blankly, and pursed his lips. “Um.”
en he studied the grass.
“at’s what I thought. Max, would you tell Mikey
what I just said?”
Max sat up a little straighter, as if he’d just been given
a big responsibility. “Coach King said we have to come
here on Tuesday and contrate. No fooling around.” He
smiled at me and I couldn’t help but smile back in return,
he was so cute.
“Exactly. Got it?”
“Yeah,” Mikey said quietly, looking sheepish.
“Everybody? Got it?” I looked around at the rest of the
team as they nodded. “Good. Okay, grab me the bases and
then go. Have a
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