teeth.
“I’m going to touch you,” he whispered.
Adam announcing his intent was so unexpected that I stopped kissing him. His mouth moved across my neck and when his fingers ran over my shirt, my body sprang forward, arching for him.
“Zoë you’re so soft,” he breathed, tracing his skillful fingers down to my stomach where they slipped beneath the shirt and stroked my bare skin.
His tongue lapped across my neck and my hand reached out to stroke his cheek, circling my fingers around the rough stubble. I heard a low decibel hum, increasing with frequency—that’s when Adam catapulted off the sofa and yelled out.
I could still feel his lips on mine and my hand was suspended where only seconds ago it traced along his jaw and hairline. I was horrified by my willingness to yield to him.
Sex always ruins friendship, and I didn’t know that I was ready to give that up. I needed a friend and couldn’t afford to lose him. Although sex would have been nice.
“What was that?” he hissed, pushing the skin of his cheek around with his hand.
“I guess a mistake?” I threw my feet on the floor and glared at his disheveled shirt. Adam ran his hand through his hair and stared down at me like I were a freak of nature.
“Do you know what you just did to me?”
I didn’t like his accusation, or his tone. “Don’t turn this around on me, you’re the one who kissed me first. Why are you looking at me that way?”
Adam sat down and lifted my hand by the wrist, like he might have picked up a dirty dishtowel that had been soaking in urine. There was no warmth in his touch as he flipped it over stroking his finger down my palm.
I shivered and pulled it away.
“Something weird just happened with your hand. You didn’t feel that?”
I didn’t want to admit to the fact that there was something fundamentally wrong with me. I felt it since the night of my attack.
But I sure as hell didn’t want to be called out on it.
“You haven’t noticed anything odd about yourself?” he added.
“Odd,” I said defensively. “Weird. Thanks for all the compliments.”
“You’re hiding something from me and I want to know what it is.”
I was already in his debt and I didn’t like that feeling of entitlement he had over me.
Moving briskly towards the front door I pulled at the handle when Adam muscled it with his strong arm.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
“None of your business,” I spat.
When I pulled again he leaned harder and that pissed me off.
“Let go, you can’t make me stay here. You don’t own me so quit treating me like property. I have a life I need to figure out and I can’t keep hiding.”
He shouldered the door and wrapped his fingers around my wrist, pulling it away from the knob. I jerked free and scowled.
“Look you aren’t the boss of me.”
Adam didn’t budge.
“Fine,” I said, backing away from the door. “Whatever.”
I locked eyes with the back doorknob and took off in a dead run. I was halfway out on the porch when he caught my arm.
“Get back in the fucking house! I’m not letting you leave.”
I struggled, trying to pull free but he reeled me in like a fish until I was inside. I looked at him with defiant eyes and he locked his arm around my hips.
“You’re not a prisoner, that’s not what this is about. I want to help you but you have to let me, you have to trust me.” When his voice softened, I considered his sincerity.
“Did I hurt you?” I asked.
“Not exactly.”
I swallowed down my relief. “Then what was it you felt?”
“So you know what I’m talking about?”
I nodded. “I’m not really sure how to answer that. I haven’t been right since my attack, and that was…” I shook my head. “I’m protecting myself because I don’t want you to think I’m crazy. I don’t want you to judge me. I don’t want you to leave me.”
And there it was, in a neat little nutshell. Adam using words like weird or strange to describe me felt like
“I’m going to touch you,” he whispered.
Adam announcing his intent was so unexpected that I stopped kissing him. His mouth moved across my neck and when his fingers ran over my shirt, my body sprang forward, arching for him.
“Zoë you’re so soft,” he breathed, tracing his skillful fingers down to my stomach where they slipped beneath the shirt and stroked my bare skin.
His tongue lapped across my neck and my hand reached out to stroke his cheek, circling my fingers around the rough stubble. I heard a low decibel hum, increasing with frequency—that’s when Adam catapulted off the sofa and yelled out.
I could still feel his lips on mine and my hand was suspended where only seconds ago it traced along his jaw and hairline. I was horrified by my willingness to yield to him.
Sex always ruins friendship, and I didn’t know that I was ready to give that up. I needed a friend and couldn’t afford to lose him. Although sex would have been nice.
“What was that?” he hissed, pushing the skin of his cheek around with his hand.
“I guess a mistake?” I threw my feet on the floor and glared at his disheveled shirt. Adam ran his hand through his hair and stared down at me like I were a freak of nature.
“Do you know what you just did to me?”
I didn’t like his accusation, or his tone. “Don’t turn this around on me, you’re the one who kissed me first. Why are you looking at me that way?”
Adam sat down and lifted my hand by the wrist, like he might have picked up a dirty dishtowel that had been soaking in urine. There was no warmth in his touch as he flipped it over stroking his finger down my palm.
I shivered and pulled it away.
“Something weird just happened with your hand. You didn’t feel that?”
I didn’t want to admit to the fact that there was something fundamentally wrong with me. I felt it since the night of my attack.
But I sure as hell didn’t want to be called out on it.
“You haven’t noticed anything odd about yourself?” he added.
“Odd,” I said defensively. “Weird. Thanks for all the compliments.”
“You’re hiding something from me and I want to know what it is.”
I was already in his debt and I didn’t like that feeling of entitlement he had over me.
Moving briskly towards the front door I pulled at the handle when Adam muscled it with his strong arm.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
“None of your business,” I spat.
When I pulled again he leaned harder and that pissed me off.
“Let go, you can’t make me stay here. You don’t own me so quit treating me like property. I have a life I need to figure out and I can’t keep hiding.”
He shouldered the door and wrapped his fingers around my wrist, pulling it away from the knob. I jerked free and scowled.
“Look you aren’t the boss of me.”
Adam didn’t budge.
“Fine,” I said, backing away from the door. “Whatever.”
I locked eyes with the back doorknob and took off in a dead run. I was halfway out on the porch when he caught my arm.
“Get back in the fucking house! I’m not letting you leave.”
I struggled, trying to pull free but he reeled me in like a fish until I was inside. I looked at him with defiant eyes and he locked his arm around my hips.
“You’re not a prisoner, that’s not what this is about. I want to help you but you have to let me, you have to trust me.” When his voice softened, I considered his sincerity.
“Did I hurt you?” I asked.
“Not exactly.”
I swallowed down my relief. “Then what was it you felt?”
“So you know what I’m talking about?”
I nodded. “I’m not really sure how to answer that. I haven’t been right since my attack, and that was…” I shook my head. “I’m protecting myself because I don’t want you to think I’m crazy. I don’t want you to judge me. I don’t want you to leave me.”
And there it was, in a neat little nutshell. Adam using words like weird or strange to describe me felt like
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