that smile that has my legs feeling like jelly.
“And you’re going to stay here, in a country you don’t know, for a girl you met two days ago while I undergo whatever it is they are going to tell me I need?” I shake my head.
“Yeah. I’ll find a place to stay, I’ve always wanted to travel, visit England.”
“This isn’t travelling Carter, this is hospital visits and sickness and who knows what else. This isn’t a holiday.”
“I know,” he takes my hand and squeezes it. “Which is why I’m not letting you do this alone. Let me be here Carmen, please?”
“If I tell you no, will you leave?”
“No.”
“So whatever I say, your mind is made up?”
“Pretty much, yeah. It will just be a whole lot easier if you’re on board with this.” he grins.
“Then I guess we need to find you a place to stay right? And me too, I cannot live with my parents any longer than I have to.”
“It’ll be okay, you know?” he whispers, leaning forward to wipe a tear from my cheek.
“I hope you’re right.” I whisper back.
H ow can this be happening?
Is this happening?
I look over at Carmen and realise it is. How can someone who looks so healthy, so well, be battling cancer right now? And how the hell can she still be smiling? Still be so strong? I sit there with everything just going around and around in my head. When I asked her what was wrong this morning, that was the very last thing I expected her to say, and she doesn’t want to tell anyone? Not Josie or Megan, she wants to do it alone. Like hell is she going to battle this thing alone. No one should have to do that and Carmen certainly isn’t going to. I’m sure she can sense the tension that feels like it’s rolling off me.
C alm down, Carter, this isn’t about you.
“Do you want to pick something to listen to?”
“What happened to my car, my music?”
“Well,” she grins. “I guess I’ve subjected you to an hour and a half of my music and I’m feeling generous, so do you want to pick or not?”
“What do you have?”
“Well, in the glove box there’s a CD wallet, flick through and see if there is anything you like, if not, then you can find a radio station you like.”
I pick out the CD wallet and start to flick through, Carmen has a lot of music. Of course she does, she’s a dancer. Joss Stone, Beyonce, NSYNC, One Direction, Sara Bareilles, Justin Timberlake, The Weekend, Sam Smith. Not my music choices at all. I decide I’m safer with the radio, then I remember Jack gave me his lead so I can play my phone in the car.
“Jack gave me a lead so I can connect my phone in the car, can I do that?” I ask cheekily.
“Sure you can.”
I delve around in my bag until I find the lead, then connect it. I bring up my music and press play, Champagne Supernova, one of my favourite Oasis songs of all time begins and Carmen smiles.
“You’re full of surprises, Carter, you know that?”
“Am I?”
“You’re from Chicago and your favourite band is Oasis. You’re about to give up travelling to… Yes. You’re full of surprises.”
“I mean what I said, I’m not leaving you to go through whatever you’re going to have to go through alone, no way.”
“Can we talk about this another time? Get Wednesday over with before we start making big decisions that will change both our lives forever?”
“Whatever happens on Wednesday, both our lives are about to change,” I tell her, reaching over to take her hand. “And whatever they tell you, Carmen, I’m going to be here.”
“Thank you, I really mean it, thank you Carter. I’ve never met anyone like you, you’re pretty special you know?” she smiles.
“If you say so,” I shrug a little uncomfortable. “So when are we stopping? This road trip is seriously lacking in snacks.”
“Are you hungry already?” she laughs.
“One thing you need to learn about me, I’m always hungry. Like, all the time.”
“We only had breakfast a little while ago.”
“A
“And you’re going to stay here, in a country you don’t know, for a girl you met two days ago while I undergo whatever it is they are going to tell me I need?” I shake my head.
“Yeah. I’ll find a place to stay, I’ve always wanted to travel, visit England.”
“This isn’t travelling Carter, this is hospital visits and sickness and who knows what else. This isn’t a holiday.”
“I know,” he takes my hand and squeezes it. “Which is why I’m not letting you do this alone. Let me be here Carmen, please?”
“If I tell you no, will you leave?”
“No.”
“So whatever I say, your mind is made up?”
“Pretty much, yeah. It will just be a whole lot easier if you’re on board with this.” he grins.
“Then I guess we need to find you a place to stay right? And me too, I cannot live with my parents any longer than I have to.”
“It’ll be okay, you know?” he whispers, leaning forward to wipe a tear from my cheek.
“I hope you’re right.” I whisper back.
H ow can this be happening?
Is this happening?
I look over at Carmen and realise it is. How can someone who looks so healthy, so well, be battling cancer right now? And how the hell can she still be smiling? Still be so strong? I sit there with everything just going around and around in my head. When I asked her what was wrong this morning, that was the very last thing I expected her to say, and she doesn’t want to tell anyone? Not Josie or Megan, she wants to do it alone. Like hell is she going to battle this thing alone. No one should have to do that and Carmen certainly isn’t going to. I’m sure she can sense the tension that feels like it’s rolling off me.
C alm down, Carter, this isn’t about you.
“Do you want to pick something to listen to?”
“What happened to my car, my music?”
“Well,” she grins. “I guess I’ve subjected you to an hour and a half of my music and I’m feeling generous, so do you want to pick or not?”
“What do you have?”
“Well, in the glove box there’s a CD wallet, flick through and see if there is anything you like, if not, then you can find a radio station you like.”
I pick out the CD wallet and start to flick through, Carmen has a lot of music. Of course she does, she’s a dancer. Joss Stone, Beyonce, NSYNC, One Direction, Sara Bareilles, Justin Timberlake, The Weekend, Sam Smith. Not my music choices at all. I decide I’m safer with the radio, then I remember Jack gave me his lead so I can play my phone in the car.
“Jack gave me a lead so I can connect my phone in the car, can I do that?” I ask cheekily.
“Sure you can.”
I delve around in my bag until I find the lead, then connect it. I bring up my music and press play, Champagne Supernova, one of my favourite Oasis songs of all time begins and Carmen smiles.
“You’re full of surprises, Carter, you know that?”
“Am I?”
“You’re from Chicago and your favourite band is Oasis. You’re about to give up travelling to… Yes. You’re full of surprises.”
“I mean what I said, I’m not leaving you to go through whatever you’re going to have to go through alone, no way.”
“Can we talk about this another time? Get Wednesday over with before we start making big decisions that will change both our lives forever?”
“Whatever happens on Wednesday, both our lives are about to change,” I tell her, reaching over to take her hand. “And whatever they tell you, Carmen, I’m going to be here.”
“Thank you, I really mean it, thank you Carter. I’ve never met anyone like you, you’re pretty special you know?” she smiles.
“If you say so,” I shrug a little uncomfortable. “So when are we stopping? This road trip is seriously lacking in snacks.”
“Are you hungry already?” she laughs.
“One thing you need to learn about me, I’m always hungry. Like, all the time.”
“We only had breakfast a little while ago.”
“A
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