for over two hundred years. It is my reputation alone
that is keeping Hayden from being burned to the ground, but that
won’t last much longer. We need to be in power again, because we
aren’t getting any respect, and some of his best fighting men have
left. Soon, other younger vampires or hunters will find out that
Devlin’s much weaker now than he was, and come for him. He’s got a
lot of enemies. I’m good, but not good enough to fight off crowds
looking to kill him by myself. And if he dies, I’ll—”
Lash abruptly stopped talking, then went to
the door and opened it. “I’m a killer, Sun. I’m going to Hell when
I die,” he hissed sadly. “Maybe saving your life will take away one
less beating I’m scheduled for.”
Then he was gone.
* * * *
The next few days passed in a haze. I got
better almost immediately, the wounds healing without leaving scars
by nightfall, as Lash said they would. But the memories remained. I
had dreams every night of what had happened to me, and the worst
was that I remembered how good it had felt, being with him, and
part of me wanted it again, wanted that pure euphoric rush. I knew
it must be the drug he’d given me, and worried it was addictive. Had Devlin been counting on that, planning on my
wanting him so much I’d let him do anything to me he
wanted?
Frightened of that possibility, I packed my
bags that night, paid up all my outstanding bills, and told my boss
I was quitting Hotcakes. I got a ride from a stranger to the bus
terminal, and went to the counter. Sure enough, there was a ticket
waiting for me in my name, paid for, that would take me anywhere in
the United States. I cashed it in, grateful but uneasy at my debt
to Lash. Without his help, I wouldn’t have had enough money to get
away, as I’d had to forfeit not only my apartment’s deposit but
also fork over an additional few months rent for canceling the
lease almost a full year early. While I could have just left in the
night without paying anything, that was too shitty. My landlord had
watched out for me for years, made sure I was never robbed or
bothered, and I couldn’t do that to him. I’d had to sign my beater
car over to him to cover that bill, though. In return, he’d said
he’d make sure all the other bills that came addressed to me were
paid, until the value of the car was used up. That was fair enough
for me.
After years of staying in one place, I was
suddenly adrift with almost no money, the only certainty that I
needed to leave town. All my carefree loner idealism was reduced to
the fact that I had no family and no real friends to turn to, no
one I could call to come and get me, no one I could hide with, or
even spend a night on their couch.
I have no one. My life isn’t carefree,
it’s empty.
That cold truth messed me up, to put it
mildly. In my highly emotional state, I decided to go back to
Montana. I knew it was a mistake, almost before the destination
left my mouth at the ticket center. But I wanted to be near my
mother, even if only to have the comfort of being near her final
resting place. Besides, how much worse could my father be, now that
I’d met the devil himself?
Chapter
Seven
The bus ride was long, hot, and dusty, like
I’d dreaded. About halfway there, I reconsidered, but I had no
money for changing my mind. So I kept going. Finally, I found
myself in Janesville.
I got off the bus, and went first to the
cemetery. My mother’s grave was overgrown with weeds. Saddened, I
spent a few hours pulling them out, scratching my hands on briars,
and cursing my father, who couldn’t be bothered to come here once
in a while to honor her after all he’d done to her. But he’d never
respected her in life. Why should I expect him to do it when she
was dead?
When I was done, I stole a small bouquet off
a new grave five rows over that had a ton of other flowers. Fuck them. No one would miss this one. God
damn it, I had no money for flowers, but I wasn’t leaving
that is keeping Hayden from being burned to the ground, but that
won’t last much longer. We need to be in power again, because we
aren’t getting any respect, and some of his best fighting men have
left. Soon, other younger vampires or hunters will find out that
Devlin’s much weaker now than he was, and come for him. He’s got a
lot of enemies. I’m good, but not good enough to fight off crowds
looking to kill him by myself. And if he dies, I’ll—”
Lash abruptly stopped talking, then went to
the door and opened it. “I’m a killer, Sun. I’m going to Hell when
I die,” he hissed sadly. “Maybe saving your life will take away one
less beating I’m scheduled for.”
Then he was gone.
* * * *
The next few days passed in a haze. I got
better almost immediately, the wounds healing without leaving scars
by nightfall, as Lash said they would. But the memories remained. I
had dreams every night of what had happened to me, and the worst
was that I remembered how good it had felt, being with him, and
part of me wanted it again, wanted that pure euphoric rush. I knew
it must be the drug he’d given me, and worried it was addictive. Had Devlin been counting on that, planning on my
wanting him so much I’d let him do anything to me he
wanted?
Frightened of that possibility, I packed my
bags that night, paid up all my outstanding bills, and told my boss
I was quitting Hotcakes. I got a ride from a stranger to the bus
terminal, and went to the counter. Sure enough, there was a ticket
waiting for me in my name, paid for, that would take me anywhere in
the United States. I cashed it in, grateful but uneasy at my debt
to Lash. Without his help, I wouldn’t have had enough money to get
away, as I’d had to forfeit not only my apartment’s deposit but
also fork over an additional few months rent for canceling the
lease almost a full year early. While I could have just left in the
night without paying anything, that was too shitty. My landlord had
watched out for me for years, made sure I was never robbed or
bothered, and I couldn’t do that to him. I’d had to sign my beater
car over to him to cover that bill, though. In return, he’d said
he’d make sure all the other bills that came addressed to me were
paid, until the value of the car was used up. That was fair enough
for me.
After years of staying in one place, I was
suddenly adrift with almost no money, the only certainty that I
needed to leave town. All my carefree loner idealism was reduced to
the fact that I had no family and no real friends to turn to, no
one I could call to come and get me, no one I could hide with, or
even spend a night on their couch.
I have no one. My life isn’t carefree,
it’s empty.
That cold truth messed me up, to put it
mildly. In my highly emotional state, I decided to go back to
Montana. I knew it was a mistake, almost before the destination
left my mouth at the ticket center. But I wanted to be near my
mother, even if only to have the comfort of being near her final
resting place. Besides, how much worse could my father be, now that
I’d met the devil himself?
Chapter
Seven
The bus ride was long, hot, and dusty, like
I’d dreaded. About halfway there, I reconsidered, but I had no
money for changing my mind. So I kept going. Finally, I found
myself in Janesville.
I got off the bus, and went first to the
cemetery. My mother’s grave was overgrown with weeds. Saddened, I
spent a few hours pulling them out, scratching my hands on briars,
and cursing my father, who couldn’t be bothered to come here once
in a while to honor her after all he’d done to her. But he’d never
respected her in life. Why should I expect him to do it when she
was dead?
When I was done, I stole a small bouquet off
a new grave five rows over that had a ton of other flowers. Fuck them. No one would miss this one. God
damn it, I had no money for flowers, but I wasn’t leaving
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