year. We had to
fix our family, he said.
All I
heard was no work, no money, and no scholarship.
No way
was that gonna happen.
Claiming
his spiritual awakening exhausted him, he released us to take a nap. As soon as
his bedroom door shut, I grabbed Mom's hand and stalked to my room, leaving the
door open a crack.
"What're
we going to do?" Fear made her voice loud and shrill.
I peeked
through the crack before guiding her to the edge of the bed. "Shh, keep
your voice down, okay? Everything's gonna be fine." I didn't believe it for
a second. "I'm going to Jake's, tell him we need to move in now."
"Jesus,
what the hell's going on?" Her voice was still shaky, but the hysteria
calmed a few decibels at the mention of Jake's name.
"Don't
know and don't care. If he wakes up, just tell him I went for another run."
Determination
settled on Mom's face. "Don't be too long. He'll get suspicious."
"I
won't." I kissed her cheek then went to pop out the window screen.
∞ ∞ ∞
An hour
later, the plan was set. It wouldn't go down until the end of the week, and so
having to fake family togetherness was a must–didn't want the bastard to get
curious.
I inched
open the front door, trying not to make any noise.
The
effort wasn't necessary.
Dad
glanced up from kissing Mom's neck–his usual rank breath the reason for her
wrinkled nose and green cheeks, no doubt–and shot me a yellow-toothed grin. "How
was the run?"
I looked
at Mom, who kept her eyes focused on mine. "Ah, hi, yeah, it was good."
"You're
gonna have to cut back on that, too, until we get this house in order."
Those words had my skin prickling.
"Yeah,
sure." I gave Mom a nod. "I'm kind of hungry."
"Good
idea, peanut." He let Mom get up. "Why don't you make us something
nice, Jacie, to celebrate?" He slapped her butt and went to the front
door. His hands shook, and a line of sweat traced the middle of his old T-shirt–side
effects of a raging alcoholic going cold turkey. "I'm gonna sit outside,
get some fresh air."
After an
air kiss, he went out on the cement blocks. The front door stayed open. He
rocked back and forth with his head resting on arms folded across his knees.
Sobriety
and Dad weren't pals.
∞ ∞ ∞
We made
sloppy joes and macaroni and cheese–the closest thing we had to a nice dinner.
Our barren cupboards and empty fridge hadn't caught up with Dad's new outlook.
In a few days, we wouldn't have to worry about it. He could starve for all I
cared.
In a
rushed whisper, I explained the plan. Some of the things we had to do, her
having to play devoted wife being the major negative, would be hard. But Mom
was a trooper. "I've been faking it for years," she said. "A few
more days won't hurt."
Once we
cleaned up dinner, the three of us settled in the living room. Dad held Mom in
his seat, and I sat in hers. After two hours of watching M*A*S*H reruns
off the cable he'd stolen from our neighbor's feed, he'd had enough family
time.
"I'm
going to bed." He wobbled to his feet and pushed Mom from his lap. "Come
on, Jacie. Let's go."
Fear
clamped around Mom's face, but she made an effort to suppress it, lifting her
chin. "Okay, let me say goodnight."
His
right hand curled into a fist. "Hurry up. I'd like to remember what it's
like going to bed with my wife."
Like it
was her fault he'd spent the last twelve years in a drunken, abusive
stupor…
He went
into their room as Mom pulled me up, hugging me close.
"Just
five more days," I said.
She
kissed my cheek. "Piece of cake."
One last
squeeze and reluctant steps took her to the bedroom door. With a sigh shaking
her thin body, she disappeared through the entry.
Had to
give her credit, going in there would've been my hard limit.
∞ ∞ ∞
The heat
from a shower relaxed me while I ran through the plan. We'd wait until Friday.
I'd go to school as usual, and Jake would pick Mom up at the trailer park entrance
at three. With a little help from sleeping pills Jake was gonna get,
fix our family, he said.
All I
heard was no work, no money, and no scholarship.
No way
was that gonna happen.
Claiming
his spiritual awakening exhausted him, he released us to take a nap. As soon as
his bedroom door shut, I grabbed Mom's hand and stalked to my room, leaving the
door open a crack.
"What're
we going to do?" Fear made her voice loud and shrill.
I peeked
through the crack before guiding her to the edge of the bed. "Shh, keep
your voice down, okay? Everything's gonna be fine." I didn't believe it for
a second. "I'm going to Jake's, tell him we need to move in now."
"Jesus,
what the hell's going on?" Her voice was still shaky, but the hysteria
calmed a few decibels at the mention of Jake's name.
"Don't
know and don't care. If he wakes up, just tell him I went for another run."
Determination
settled on Mom's face. "Don't be too long. He'll get suspicious."
"I
won't." I kissed her cheek then went to pop out the window screen.
∞ ∞ ∞
An hour
later, the plan was set. It wouldn't go down until the end of the week, and so
having to fake family togetherness was a must–didn't want the bastard to get
curious.
I inched
open the front door, trying not to make any noise.
The
effort wasn't necessary.
Dad
glanced up from kissing Mom's neck–his usual rank breath the reason for her
wrinkled nose and green cheeks, no doubt–and shot me a yellow-toothed grin. "How
was the run?"
I looked
at Mom, who kept her eyes focused on mine. "Ah, hi, yeah, it was good."
"You're
gonna have to cut back on that, too, until we get this house in order."
Those words had my skin prickling.
"Yeah,
sure." I gave Mom a nod. "I'm kind of hungry."
"Good
idea, peanut." He let Mom get up. "Why don't you make us something
nice, Jacie, to celebrate?" He slapped her butt and went to the front
door. His hands shook, and a line of sweat traced the middle of his old T-shirt–side
effects of a raging alcoholic going cold turkey. "I'm gonna sit outside,
get some fresh air."
After an
air kiss, he went out on the cement blocks. The front door stayed open. He
rocked back and forth with his head resting on arms folded across his knees.
Sobriety
and Dad weren't pals.
∞ ∞ ∞
We made
sloppy joes and macaroni and cheese–the closest thing we had to a nice dinner.
Our barren cupboards and empty fridge hadn't caught up with Dad's new outlook.
In a few days, we wouldn't have to worry about it. He could starve for all I
cared.
In a
rushed whisper, I explained the plan. Some of the things we had to do, her
having to play devoted wife being the major negative, would be hard. But Mom
was a trooper. "I've been faking it for years," she said. "A few
more days won't hurt."
Once we
cleaned up dinner, the three of us settled in the living room. Dad held Mom in
his seat, and I sat in hers. After two hours of watching M*A*S*H reruns
off the cable he'd stolen from our neighbor's feed, he'd had enough family
time.
"I'm
going to bed." He wobbled to his feet and pushed Mom from his lap. "Come
on, Jacie. Let's go."
Fear
clamped around Mom's face, but she made an effort to suppress it, lifting her
chin. "Okay, let me say goodnight."
His
right hand curled into a fist. "Hurry up. I'd like to remember what it's
like going to bed with my wife."
Like it
was her fault he'd spent the last twelve years in a drunken, abusive
stupor…
He went
into their room as Mom pulled me up, hugging me close.
"Just
five more days," I said.
She
kissed my cheek. "Piece of cake."
One last
squeeze and reluctant steps took her to the bedroom door. With a sigh shaking
her thin body, she disappeared through the entry.
Had to
give her credit, going in there would've been my hard limit.
∞ ∞ ∞
The heat
from a shower relaxed me while I ran through the plan. We'd wait until Friday.
I'd go to school as usual, and Jake would pick Mom up at the trailer park entrance
at three. With a little help from sleeping pills Jake was gonna get,
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