Sebastian had said he was shooting a movie here in Savannah, and it didn’t take a rocket scientist, or in my case a computer nerd, to find out the name of the movie and get a location map for where they would be filming. So here I was, sneaking around like the paparazzi. Approaching slowly I saw a film crew standing around a long folding table and chatting. Over to my left, I saw a crowd of locals standing around watching the action. I couldn’t risk Sebastian seeing me, so I walked over behind the group and tried to squeeze my not-so-skinny ass behind a tree.
I didn’t have to wait very long before I saw Sebastian standing in the doorway of a trailer near the set. He was dressed in a period costume, which was appropriate since the title of his movie was The Colony . My heart skipped a beat as he stepped out into the bright Georgia sunshine He was breathtakingly beautiful, and I was overwhelmed with feelings of loss. He was fiddling with his massive billowing sleeve as a lady rushed over to him. I moved a little from the tree so that I could watch as the lady covered his face with more makeup. After she walked away, someone yelled his name, and he glanced over at the group in front of me. He seemed to hesitate, and for a second I thought he saw me. I quickly jumped back behind the tree and turned to face the other way. Please don’t see me… please don’t see me , I thought as I slightly freaked out. I listened as a few girls called out his name, and I closed my eyes and held my breath as I heard him speaking to them.
Damn, I miss him , I thought as my heart threatened to explode. I have to get out of here. This was a mistake. I stood behind that tree for what seemed like an eternity before I heard someone from across the road call out his name. I gave it a few minutes, and then I peeked out from around the tree. Sebastian was nowhere to be seen. I gathered up my courage, and all that was left of my shattered heart, and walked down the street, away from Sebastian.
I managed to make it back to my apartment before I really let myself feel the pain. The man of my dreams, my friend, was here in Savannah, and I wouldn’t be able to see him or talk to him. I spent the rest of the afternoon holed up in my apartment, lying on the sofa trying to get past this heartbreak. But nothing was working. I couldn’t get him out of my head. How had I allowed myself to mess up this badly?
By that night I was miserable and starving. I had just placed my online order for some Chinese soup, and now I was aimlessly looking around the Internet. I felt lost. Ever since New York, I hadn’t been able to go on Sebastian’s fan page. I tried once, but all it did was remind me of how things used to be, and frankly, it hurt too much. Patricia and Celeste had both tried to contact me, but I had ignored all messages. It took too much energy to answer them.
The ringing of the doorbell jarred me out of my self-imposed seclusion. Grabbing my cash to pay the deliveryman, I walked to the door. When I opened it, I did a double take. Sebastian was standing right there in the doorway.
“Hey, Ashley. May I come in?” he asked in a quiet voice.
Without speaking a word, I slowly backed up, giving him room to come inside. Sebastian walked in and looked around at my kitchen, covered in take-out boxes, and my living room, covered in trash and blankets from when I had tried to sleep on the sofa. Looking back at me, he said, “Are you okay?”
Finally I found my voice, “Yeah, I’m fine… can’t you tell?”
Sebastian looked at me, sincerity in his eyes. “Ashley, I came to talk. Is now a good time?”
“Depends on what you want to talk about,” I said, my voice shaking.
“I want to talk about us,” he responded.
I have to admit, my heart started doing that thing again. The one where I felt like I couldn’t breathe because it was pounding out of my chest, yet anxiety was squeezing it back in.
“Okay, let’s go into the living room,” I
I didn’t have to wait very long before I saw Sebastian standing in the doorway of a trailer near the set. He was dressed in a period costume, which was appropriate since the title of his movie was The Colony . My heart skipped a beat as he stepped out into the bright Georgia sunshine He was breathtakingly beautiful, and I was overwhelmed with feelings of loss. He was fiddling with his massive billowing sleeve as a lady rushed over to him. I moved a little from the tree so that I could watch as the lady covered his face with more makeup. After she walked away, someone yelled his name, and he glanced over at the group in front of me. He seemed to hesitate, and for a second I thought he saw me. I quickly jumped back behind the tree and turned to face the other way. Please don’t see me… please don’t see me , I thought as I slightly freaked out. I listened as a few girls called out his name, and I closed my eyes and held my breath as I heard him speaking to them.
Damn, I miss him , I thought as my heart threatened to explode. I have to get out of here. This was a mistake. I stood behind that tree for what seemed like an eternity before I heard someone from across the road call out his name. I gave it a few minutes, and then I peeked out from around the tree. Sebastian was nowhere to be seen. I gathered up my courage, and all that was left of my shattered heart, and walked down the street, away from Sebastian.
I managed to make it back to my apartment before I really let myself feel the pain. The man of my dreams, my friend, was here in Savannah, and I wouldn’t be able to see him or talk to him. I spent the rest of the afternoon holed up in my apartment, lying on the sofa trying to get past this heartbreak. But nothing was working. I couldn’t get him out of my head. How had I allowed myself to mess up this badly?
By that night I was miserable and starving. I had just placed my online order for some Chinese soup, and now I was aimlessly looking around the Internet. I felt lost. Ever since New York, I hadn’t been able to go on Sebastian’s fan page. I tried once, but all it did was remind me of how things used to be, and frankly, it hurt too much. Patricia and Celeste had both tried to contact me, but I had ignored all messages. It took too much energy to answer them.
The ringing of the doorbell jarred me out of my self-imposed seclusion. Grabbing my cash to pay the deliveryman, I walked to the door. When I opened it, I did a double take. Sebastian was standing right there in the doorway.
“Hey, Ashley. May I come in?” he asked in a quiet voice.
Without speaking a word, I slowly backed up, giving him room to come inside. Sebastian walked in and looked around at my kitchen, covered in take-out boxes, and my living room, covered in trash and blankets from when I had tried to sleep on the sofa. Looking back at me, he said, “Are you okay?”
Finally I found my voice, “Yeah, I’m fine… can’t you tell?”
Sebastian looked at me, sincerity in his eyes. “Ashley, I came to talk. Is now a good time?”
“Depends on what you want to talk about,” I said, my voice shaking.
“I want to talk about us,” he responded.
I have to admit, my heart started doing that thing again. The one where I felt like I couldn’t breathe because it was pounding out of my chest, yet anxiety was squeezing it back in.
“Okay, let’s go into the living room,” I
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