The Best Early Stories of F. Scott Fitzgerald by F. Scott Fitzgerald

while some newsboy told him that the war was over, and he was glad, because it meant that Peat Brothers, publishers, would get out their new edition of “Spinoza’s Improvement of the Understanding.” 3 Wars were all very well in their way, made young men self-reliant or something, but Horace felt that he could never forgive the President for allowing a brass band to play under his window on the night of the false armistice, causing him to leave three important sentences out of his thesis on “German Idealism.”
    The next year he went up to Yale to take his degree as Master of Arts.
    He was seventeen then, tall and slender, with near-sighted gray eyes and an air of keeping himself utterly detached from the mere words he let drop.
    “I never feel as though I’m talking to him,” expostulated Professor Dillinger to a sympathetic colleague. “He makes me feel as though I were talking to his representative. I always expect him to say: ‘Well, I’ll ask myself and find out.’ ”
    And then, just as nonchalantly as though Horace Tarbox had been Mr. Beef the butcher or Mr. Hat the haberdasher, life reached in, seized him, handled him, stretched him, and unrolled him like a piece of Irish lace on a Saturday-afternoon bargain-counter.
    To move in the literary fashion I should say that this was all because when way back in colonial days the hardy pioneers had come to a bald place in Connecticut and asked of each other, “Now, what shall we build here?” the hardiest one among ’em had answered: “Let’s build a town where theatrical managers can try out musical comedies!” How afterward they founded Yale College there, to try the musical comedies on, is a story every one knows. At any rate one December, “Home James” 4 opened at the Shubert, and all the students encored Marcia Meadow, who sang a song about the Blundering Blimp 5 in the first act and did a shaky, shivery, celebrated dance in the last.
    Marcia was nineteen. She didn’t have wings, but audiences agreed generally that she didn’t need them. She was a blonde by natural pigment, and she wore no paint on the streets at high noon. Outside of that she was no better than most women.
    It was Charlie Moon who promised her five thousand Pall Malls 6 if she would pay a call on Horace Tarbox, prodigy extraordinary. Charlie was a senior in Sheffield, 7 and he and Horace were first cousins. They liked and pitied each other.
    Horace had been particularly busy that night. The failure of the Frenchman Laurier to appreciate the significance of the new realists was preying on his mind. In fact, his only reaction to a low, clear-cut rap at his study was to make him speculate as to whether any rap would have actual existence without an ear there to hear it. He fancied he was verging more and more toward pragmatism. But at that moment, though he did not know it, he was verging with astounding rapidity toward something quite different.
    The rap sounded—three seconds leaked by—the rap sounded.
    “Come in,” muttered Horace automatically.
    He heard the door open and then close, but, bent over his book in the big armchair before the fire, he did not look up.
    “Leave it on the bed in the other room,” he said absently.
    “Leave what on the bed in the other room?”
    Marcia Meadow had to talk her songs, but her speaking voice was like byplay on a harp.
    “The laundry.”
    “I can’t.”
    Horace stirred impatiently in his chair.
    “Why can’t you?”
    “Why, because I haven’t got it.”
    “Hm!” he replied testily. “Suppose you go back and get it.”
    Across the fire from Horace was another easy-chair. He was accustomed to change to it in the course of an evening by way of exercise and variety. One chair he called Berkeley, 8 the other he called Hume. 9 He suddenly heard a sound as of a rustling, diaphanous form sinking into Hume. He glanced up.
    “Well,” said Marcia with the sweet smile she used in Act Two (“Oh, so the Duke liked my dancing!”),